Shafted

Once upon a time in a little place called Fortitude Valley, a nice young raver was going about his business in a haze of X and happiness, when he was accosted by two beautiful women. They didn't speak English, but by their mini skirts and sparkles, he assumed they were looking for a good time.

He gestured for them to follow, as he was sure the club he was headed for was the one they were to have a dance to start the night off.

As they arrived, the doorman was kind and gentle and said they could enter.

The nice young raver was feeling rather chipper at his entrance to the club, as it was very unusual for him to be with such lovely young foreigners, who dressed like European hookers. He was meeting his friends there to plan out their night of drug-taking and the like, and his mood became even more chipper when his friends all came over to say hello...and he felt that at last, he was getting the respect he so richly deserved.

The DJ was cranking out some loopy hard house tunes and the friends, along with their new acquaintances, were all having a fat time.

”FULLY SICK!!!” was one comment that caused the crowd to lift and scream.

Soon, the nice young raver was beginning to feel a little tired and needed to go to the restroom to substance abuse his little brains out. He was followed by the lovely young foreigners, as they too were suffering from lack of effect from the substances they had consumed earlier that evening.

”Oh no, you can’t come in here." said the nice young raver. "The kind and gentle doorman will see and evict us from this banging club.”

The lovely young foreigners looked downcast, and the nice young raver felt glum that he couldn't share some of the substances he had secreted upon his person. Then, he came up with an excellent plan. As the lovely young foreigners couldn't speak the local language, he used his very best hand signals and mouthed in a foreign accent that they could take his small bag of substances and use some for themselves.

Huge smiles became the answer to his suggestion, and the lovely young foreigners quickly disappeared into the lady's restroom.

Happy as can be to offer these lovely young foreigners some of his substances, he waited outside the restroom for their hasty return. But, some time had lapsed, and the nice young raver was beginning to worry.

But then they appeared, looking as sprightly as ever, and the nice young raver was sure that at night's end, one of these lovely young foreigners was to accompany him home for a day of shenanigans at his humble abode. All he had to do now was recover his substances, that were surely left over for his own tiredness to be rectified.

But, it seemed there was some sort of misunderstanding. The lovely young foreigners looked blankly at the nice young raver when he tried to convey to them that he too was feeling a little tired and needed some of the substances that surely they had left over for him…but alas, it was not to be. The lovely young foreigners had misunderstood what the nice young raver had said, and used the entire bag of substances, leaving nothing for the nice young raver to use for himself.

Oh well, at least he was still to have his way with one of the lovely young foreigners in the day ahead. But, as he turned to find them, he was surprised to see they had already left the banging club, disappearing into the smog of a lovely pre-dawn morn, in the beautiful Fortitude Valley.