Don’t Throw Things In The House

“GOD DA—, uhhh, DARN it! Why did you do that? You know you’re not supposed to throw things in the house.”

“Sorry grampa, I was playing catch with the dog.”

“Catch? You mean the dog was throwing the ball back? Make her do it again so I can see.”

“She didn’t throwing it back she bringed it back then I throw it again.”

“Wasn’t. And brings.”

“What grampa?”

“Wasn’t throwing it back. Didn’t doesn’t work there. And she brings it back.”

“My fiends at school say that.”

“Well, your friends are wrong too.”

“But Ricky’s 8 and he’s in the 4th grade already and he says it.”

“Okay, I’m 75 and have 3 degrees, one a masters in physics. I guess you could say I’m in the, uhhh— 20th grade.”

“Wow! I din’t know grades went that high.”

“Didn’t. Din’t isn’t a word.”

“But Ricky says—“

“Ricky’s wrong there too. Come here and check out my screen. Look what you made me do.”

“Wow! What does @#sft/=**([it } mean?”

“It’s garbage. When that ball fell on my keyboard that’s what happened. Your lucky it didn’t break something, I’d have been really piss—, upset then. This iPad cost me $1,200.”

“I’m sorry grampa, I won’t do it again.”

“That’s Okay Oliver, Just please be careful. And don’t throw things in the house. Take Vega outside and throw it for her.”

“Okay, c’mon Vega, outside! Oops.”

“DAM—, DANG it Oliver, I just asked you not to do that.”

“Sorry grampa. C’mon Vega, let’s go outside.”

“Oliver?”

“Yes grampa?”

“I love you buddy. Give me a hug.”

“I love you too grampa. You hug hard. C’MON VEGA, WOO HOO HOO! OFF TO THE MOON!”

“DAM—, DANG IT OLIVER, DO NOT SLAM DOORS IS ANOTHER RULE!”

“Sorry grampa—“

“Oh well, you’ve gotta love them.”