The Call

The Call  (ASR) Contest entry for Dialogue 500. January 2019 #2179080 by Chris Breva

Prompt: JANUARY PROMPT/ You get a call from a dead relative.

363 words

"Hello?"

"Hi big brother! Guess who this is?"

"I know the voice but the owner is dead."

"Yeah. I'm dead but God is allowing me to call you. He seen your struggles and wants you to know that you will be victorious this year. You've been struggling for a long time. Now victory is in sight. Hold on tight and prepare for the ride of your life! You were always telling me that God would provide me with the victory. I didn't believe you for a long time. Then one day I happened upon one of the journals you kept a long time ago. I believe you called it, uh, a prayer journal? Well I read that journal and was convinced that you sincerely meant what you were saying. Nobody else was suppose to read that journal and you wrote some really juicy stuff in it. So I, uh, I knew you weren't lying in it. You could fool almost anybody but, uh, it's hard to fool yourself. So either you were lying to yourself or you sincerely believed the garbage you put in your journal. That journal led me to become a Christian. I died just a few days later."

"Yeah right! First I get a call from somebody impersonating my dead brother and then they try to tell me that you were a believer? I'll tell you what I believe. I believe your full of something very smelly and that this phone call is some sick prank! Do you honestly expect me to believe that my brother is calling me from the grave? What did you do? Did you dial one eight hundred now dead to call me? Do you think I believe that for one second? Do you think I'm crazy?"

"There's no doubt you're crazy! You've always been crazy! But since you don't believe God I'll tell you what. You're going to be mute for two days so you'll learn to keep your big mouth shut! Don't even try to answer. Mute people can't talk! You know the old saying "deaf and dumb?" Well you're as dumb as a post right now! I won't be calling you again! Bye!"