We Could Open A Pizza Place, Ralph!

“Come on, Phil, nobody’s home. It’ll be easy pickings, lots of bushes in the back yard and an alley.”

“Whatever, Ralph. Can’t we get somethin’ to eat before we do it? I’m really hungry.”

“I just bought you a burger, fries and a shake an hour ago.”

“I know, but I’m Really hungry.”

“No! Well do this and if you don’t screw anything up, maybe after.”

“Thank you, Ralph, we can go to that new chicken place.”

“I said Maybe, Phil. Now quiet until we’re inside.”

“”Why was the door unlocked, Ralph? No alarm either. What’s up?”

“Quiet. I need to think.”

“You think good, Ralph.”

”Hello, can I help you?”

“Holy Shit! Who are you? And where did you come from?”

“I’m, Cletus, and I’m the ... house keeper I guess. I keep the house safe.”

“Not any longer, fleet...whatever. This piece’ll punch an eight inch hole out your back.”

“Watch.”

“Holy crap, Ralph, his hand went through the banister. “

“Then he’s not a problem. He’s a ghost and can’t touch us.”

“Ralph?”

“What? ... what the hell, you stabbed me! How’d you do that?

“I can materialize any or all of me, if it happens to be a finger nail and my hand happens to be in your chest it‘s fatal. I’ve done it before, but I’d prefer you step into the back yard, I hate dragging bodies. Reminds me of the Civil War.”

“Civil war?”

“Yep! Born ‘n Missouri ’n 31, that’s 1831, joined the north and was dragging a body at Antietam when some dirty reb shot me. Wasn’t even carryin’ a gun. Rotten bastard.”

“We’d better go, ca’mon, Phil.”

“I’d change careers if I were you.. I read your ID’s and I’ll report you if you come back.”

“We could open a Pizza place, Ralph!”