The Sand Man

The Sand Man

“Well, I don’t think I’ve ever watched a grown man fall face first into sand.”

“It’s soft sand.”

“But you were wet and now you look like The Sand Man out to put the world to sleep.”

"Keeping up with those girls exhausted me. I’m sixty-five, not thirty-five. I’ll just lie back down here and put myself to sleep."

"You're fantastic. I’m thinking fifty watching you body surf, but I know your youngest is forty-two."

"Umm, mostly that was belly-flopping ... maybe I should go rinse, brushing this off is a pain."

"Well I'm impressed anyway. I’m exhausted and I'll only be thirty-three in December. Give me the towel, I’ll help.”

"Thanks, Evelyn. Is it safe to open my eyes?”

“Just a sec ... there, I got it off your face and eyebrows.”

"How are you and the girls doing? You seem down today."

"The girls are okay, I’m not. Their father was killed in Pakistan the day Claire was born. A hell of a birthday gift ... her eighth birthday is next week."

"I didn’t know, I’m sorry. We’ve been here five hours and they look pretty tired. Maybe we should feed them and get them home.”

“Yes. Thank you.”

~

“There, all tucked in and asleep. They almost couldn’t finish the hamburgers, but they did drink all their shakes. I'll call you tomorrow. I have an great idea for Claire’s birthday. I know a professional clown."

"Thank you for helping me carry them in, I am beat. We can talk about the clown tomorrow."

"Would a goodnight kiss on the cheek be appropriate?"

"I think a real goodnight kiss would be more appropriate right now."

~

“Umm ... thank you. That was unexpected and totally wonderful.”

“Well, it’s been two months since we met and we’ve been out a dozen times. I waited two weeks then had to ask you out first. Why?”

“Well ... I’m a little slow ... I’m old.”

“After today you can’t play The Old Card with me. Especially after that kiss. That curled my toes.”

“My wife loved kissing, I got a lot of practice.”

“Thank you ... Paige? ... right?”

“Yes. You’re pretty good too.”

“Pretty good? I’ve never had complaints before.”

“Complain... What? That was not a complaint! That was wonderful. I’m a little slow.”

“Little? I have to ask for the first date and wait two months before I have to ask for the first kiss? That’s not Slow, it’s Petrified.”

“I’ve never been able to ask for a date first. I have no trouble asking now.”
“What about kissing?”

“Kiss me, and take a deep breath, it’ll be a while before your next one.”

~

“Okay, That problems solved. What about sex?

“I ... uhh ... I’m not ...”

“Go get your toothbrush and whatever else you need. Do you like pancakes for breakfast?”

“What? But...”

“Go. And don’t take too long.”

“But...”

“Now! God, what’s next?”

“Nothing, you’ve uncaged the beast.”

“I can hardly wait ...Go!”

“What about ...”

“They already love you too. Now go!”

“Yes, dear.”