My Truth

I can’t believe I’m here again
I promised I wouldn’t cry
Feel like there’s nothing left to gain
But I hold that thought inside

I fight so hard
Every hour of every day
But it feels so useless
No trophy I can raise

I’m so sorry I can’t be who you’re telling me to be
I never knew I had a choice
To do something other than agree
In silence I stand waiting like your loyal devotee
But now I’ve found myself falling on my knees
Praying please someone please help me

You’ve done so much to me
Physically and emotionally
And yet, somehow, I’m the one
Who’s constantly feeling guilty

You never apologized
You left me to pick up the pieces
To put my life back together
While my hope just decreases

I’m so sorry I can’t be who you’re telling me to be
I never knew I had a choice
To do something other than agree
In silence I stand waiting like your loyal devotee
But now I’ve found myself falling on my knees
Praying please someone please help me

Even after all of this, I don’t hate you
They tell me to leave but I just can’t
My whole life has been centered around
Those toxic words you won’t recant

I can’t believe I’m saying this
But, unfortunately, it’s the truth
It doesn’t bring me bliss
But maybe there are symptoms it will sooth

I’m so sorry I can’t be who you’re telling me to be
I never knew I had a choice
To do something other than agree
In silence I stand waiting like your loyal devotee
But now I’ve found myself falling on my knees
Praying please someone please help me

I’m still fighting
I don’t want this to be goodbye
But my hope is slipping
And I wonder if life is better in the sky