Left tongue, Right tongue

This new suit was awesome.
It is detecting my sweat and quietly air conditioning my skin there.
My Dad swore I would thank him for it after this first interview and he was right.
I can't imagine what I would look like right now if I were wearing my old dumb suit.
*PSSST*
"You will do great. Don't forget to turn off your phone."
I can't help but grin since I clearly forgot to turn it off and spend a half second replying.
"Thanks Dad! Turning it off now. I'll let you know how it went after."
Then shut down the phone and realized that my interviewer was looking at my funny.
"Did you just send a text?" She asks.
"Sorry yes. My Dad sent me a text reminding me to turn off my phone and I told him I was doing it now." I said with embarrassment.
"I saw your head shake a bit and realized you might be typing faster than any one I have ever seen." She said still in awe.
I didn't really know what she meant, but accepted that I was probably faster than average given how long I had been typing that way.
"The next part of the interview involves you demonstrating your abilities with the split tongue interface system that will be required as part of your job due to speed increases in workflow." She says clearly having given this speech many time before.
"I will need you to accept the following terms and set your local puter to download mode so we can install some testing software." She continued.
I signed on the line and set my local computer to download acceptance mode as well as she instructed and everything seemed to be moving well until she frowned and looked puzzled.
"Something wrong?" I ask her.
"It says that the current version is higher than our version, but that is impossible." She tells me.
"Oh, I am probably running a pre-release version of one or more of the programs you are trying to install." I say to try to smooth it over.
"But our software is the latest and most updated possible. We get it before the public." She says still confused.
"I guess we haven't covered that part yet. I wrote some of the software such as the typing program that most people are using if they have tongue input." I say.
"You can't be more than eighteen years old." She says in clear disbelief.
"As of this past weekend actually. I've been working on this stuff since I was twelve and my invented it for paralyzed people at first." I said.
"It became so useful that our whole family was using it with mouth guard type wireless sensors to interact with the computers around us." I went on.
"I complained about the arrangement of the letters of the standard keyboard layout we were using and my Dad suggested I make something better." I finished.
"Welcome to the company." Is her reply once she had realized the connotations behind everything I said.