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The not-as-epicly-long/ abridged version- 97 lines, 432 words (vs 165 and 855) |
The Sock Monster is a large, sneaky fellow. He takes socks- but only one per pair- and then goes to put them in his lair. He comes at night to take your sock, if you have not properly put it away. Or if you sleep with socks on your unblanketed feet, he yanks one off with a practiced pull. He puts it on his head of horns, and you'll never know until morning, when you wake up with both feet bare. But what happens to the other sock, might you ask? Especially if there's two to take. One sock goes with Mr. Monster, and the other, well, it ends up on the floor, or on the bed, so you think you kicked them off after falling asleep last night. His friends help, too, by going to different rooms. When you drop a sock behind the washer or while you do the laundry, the Sock Monster sees it, and will be there, w a i t i n g .... watching 👀 .... until everyone is gone. he goes there and snatches it away, back to that hidden sock lair. The Sock Monster isn't scared of anyone. If Daddy fell asleep watching TV, you can bet his sock will be missing tomorrow morning. One on the ground, and one, who knows where it went? I suppose, only the Sock Monster and his friends will know. Mommy will scold Daddy in the morning, but when she's not looking, Mr. Sock Monster messes up the laundry, too. A missing sock here, a missing sock there. She never notices, until everything is done. And then she says, "How annoying!" when maybe one, or three, have slipped away, never, ever, to be found again. His absolute favorite place, though, has to be the Laundromat, where people trust their clothes to be safe, but he is behind the machines, w a i t i n g .... once more. watching you turn your back .... watching you leave. 👀 But, you must understand, these missing socks not only make up his mysterious lair, but they are everywhere in his hair, and they feed the monsters of Monsterland. For, you see, these missing socks have feelings too, and after parting with their other half, they get sadder and sadder until the day comes when their sadness is so sad, the ends of their sad faces connect, and they turn into a doughnut! It is these doughnuts that Monsters, like the Bogeyman, or the Monster Under Your Bed and the Abominable Snowman eat, to stay alive and that is also why monsters are all quite fat! |