Heartbroken Betrayal

I can't believe he left me here. It's so cold that it hurts. My body aches more and more with every beat of my heart. I really loved him. Sometimes it hurts so much that I just wish I could stop breathing, so that my heart would stop beating and I won't have to feel anything anymore. It hurts enough to keep me awake though, it keeps me pacing back and forth, from wall to wall. I have long since swallowed my hunger and ignored my throbbing headache. I don't want to breathe. Breathing is just another reminder that all of this is real.

My head spins, but the small room doesn't spin with it. I've been fighting with myself over the past couple of hours about whether or not I should just let go. This has caused me too much pain in such a short amount of time. I can't believe he would do this to me. How could someone be so cruel?

I'm slowly forgetting though. I have forgotten the way he looks when he's playing Minecraft at 2 A.M. with sleep deprived eyes. I have forgotten the way his snoring would resonate throughout the house. I feel like an ocean tide is gently pulling me away from the only island I've ever known: him. It doesn't matter how hard I try to hold on to him, the tide always pulls me back into the ocean. The island sand is slipping through my hands and I lose a little bit more of the memories I share with him.
I've always hated having cold hands. I shove my hands deeper into my pockets and slowly slide down the wall until I'm in a sitting position on the floor. I lean my head against the wall and close my eyes. I prepare to do something I haven't done in a long, long time. I prepare myself to pray.

Hey, God. It's me. I know we don't really talk that much anymore, and half of the time I pretend you don't exist, but I'm about to die pretty soon because my idiot brother locked me in the McDonald's freezer. So, I would really appreciate it if you could just overlook the whole "I renounce my faith, and become an Atheist phase" when you're deciding my eternal placement.