Didn't See It Coming

In front of a well known club in Los Angeles, I was fighting with a bouncer who neither cared for my shit nor wanted to deal with it. Of course, it wasn't really “fighting” as much as it was some dude, who had just been thrown out on his ass, drunkenly yelling at a man twice his size. But in my intoxicated mind it was a fight -- one that I "won" with a comeback so slurred no one could understand and so stupid I won't repeat it here. After that I sauntered off with what was left of my "swag" (oh God), thinking that the snickering behind me was directed at the bouncer.

I stumbled off into the streets of L.A., looking for a new place to drink and dance. I smiled at girls who simply ignored me, and patted complete strangers on the shoulder because I thought I recognized them from my chem class. Eventually, I found myself waiting in a long line to another club with bright lights and loud music, and pretty girls and stupid boys. It wasn't until I was almost in that I noticed the most beautiful woman I'd ever seen.

Of all the black cars on the street that night, I saw hers, and through the rolled down window I saw her face shining brighter than the neon signs that lit up the street, staring at me. She sat in the driver’s seat in a dress as black as night, her close lipped smile was everything I ever wanted and her eyes seemed to beg me to come to her; I couldn’t stop staring. Then someone shouted, "Hey asshole!" and shoved in front of me, and for a second she was out of my line of sight. I don't know if it was the beer or the beauty, but I decided right then and there that I would never lose her again and hopped right into traffic to get to her. I nearly got run over, but I made it to her and that was all that mattered.

I leaned against the car door and opened my mouth to say something stupid. Luckily, she put her finger over her lips and motioned me to get into the passenger’s seat, which quickly shut me up. I ran excitedly to the other side of the car like a toddler who was just told they were going to McDonald’s and took my seat beside her. We drove off and I didn't even ask where we were going because, you know, I was going with her and it didn’t really matter. She was beautiful, the way her face seemed to change in a cycle as we passed under street light after street light, the way her hands and arms twirled around the wheel as the car turned, the way she glanced ever so often at me through the corner of her eyes.

We finally came to a stop in a place I knew well: my dinky apartment building. She held my hand and took me to my own home, guiding me as if I had no idea where it was, like I'd get lost without her guidance, which was probably true with the state I was in. She seemed to glide up the stairs as we avoided the elevator and took the long way up to my apartment, her steps so light and soft they didn’t even echo in the empty corridor.

Her hand barely touched the doorknob as she opened the door to my apartment without a key, something I probably should have questioned but brushed off instead. She floated across my apartment, entered my room and sat on my bed, barely compressing the mattress, and I followed in a trance. I went to her and she pulled me down to meet her face to face, and we kissed and fell on the bed with my arms racing to undress her.

We fucked. It was gentle, magical, pure euphoric pleasure, with no ulterior motives, no drawbacks, no complications. It ended just when it should have, with both of us pleased and tired, with nothing left undone that should have been done and nothing done that was not for the good of both of us. And I lay, staring at my ceiling, curious as to what just happened, and she lay too, thinking about God knows what.

Then I did something that might have been regrettable if I was any other man and if she was any other woman. I broke the silence and told the cheesiest joke a human could make, some pun about Star Wars, and this thing she did with her legs while we were at it. But before I could regret drinking one too many and letting myself talk to a beautiful girl, she laughed.

"I missed that about you." She said through the laughter. She hit me on the chest jokingly, and let her hand rest there as her laughter calmed down.

I looked at her and gave her a blank stare, my mind full of thoughts racing so fast they might as well have not been there because there was no way I was going to catch them. When it finally hit me, it was like nothing I had ever felt before in my life. I opened my mouth to speak to her but she put her finger over my lips and shook her head.

“You’ve really let yourself go, huh? You shouldn’t; I know you’re better than this.”

I opened my mouth to speak again but she shushed me and closed her eyes and I decided that I might as well join her if she wasn’t going to let me do anything else.

I woke up that morning alone. There was no black dress on my bedroom floor, no black car parked in front of my apartment, no her. So I decided to listen to what she had said, she was always right, anyway. I’d get away from the party life, focus more on school, and go back to being the man I was before the love of my life died last year.