to the first guy i fell in love with..

I wish I didn’t have to love you... You brought me so much happiness, I forgot how it was to be sad... How could you just disappear and appear again like nothing happened?? I missed you while you were gone.. I really did... And I cannot forget you cause you have given me so many things to remember you from... I see you everywhere, every place we ever went to. And I yearned to hear your voice.. I yearned to touch you again, to feel your warmth.. I yearned for that sweet scent, the one you wear on your collar...
My mind is a mess, cause it always worries about you. You never talked to me anymore. You never text, or call.. You never emailed me, or not even a pop chat on Facebook.. How are you? Are you well??? I wish you were happy in whatever it is that you're doing there.
Is it love when you miss someone? Is it love when you always want them near? Is it love when you would want to talk to them or even just hear them say goodnight? Is it love when you're sad because you just feel like he’s ignoring you? Or maybe you are suffocating him.

I can’t help but remember how inseparable we once was.. How you text me even if you're busy studying. How you carry my bag even if its heavy how you look at me with wide eyes open as I walk towards you... How we spend the whole night just going someplace to sit and talk about things. How I listen to your stories and know you bit by bit. How I fell in love with your charm, humor and innocence. You have earned me. All of me... I don’t even belong to myself anymore cause I am all yours.
I love you so much...