Phantasmic: Roach Problem

Phantasmic

by Kirby Ray

"Roach Problems"

PAGE 1:

(Panel) 1: Open on a heavy traffic jam. Cars are lined up bumper to bumper, and the drivers (the ones we can make out, at least) are furious. What we can see of the roadside shows a number of trees, behind which are stores.

SFX1: HONK!

SFX2: HOOONK!!

SFX3: HOOOOONK!!!

RADIO: This traffic report is brought to you by Clown Cuisine, home of the one and only Fried Laughing Fish.

RADIO2: It's a busy Monday morning here in San Disco, and the streets are packed! We've got a fender-bender on 18th St. that's making a bottle-neck--

2: Cut to the inside of one of the cars. The DRIVER is a heavy-set man in a button-down shirt, with a receding hairline, who is pressing down on his horn as hard as he can.

SFX: HOOONK!!

DRIVER: Come on, come on...I've got a meeting to get to!

RADIO: --a burst water main in the middle of Park Road--

3: Suddenly, the DRIVER relaxes his hand and peers out of his window. His eyes are wide with shock as he watches this spectacle fly by him.

DRIVER (small): Oh geez...

RADIO: --and if you happen to be near the intersection of Pine and Johnston, be careful--

4: Outside, a pick-up truck flies over the traffic jam. Other drivers are popping their heads out to see what's going on, and many are fleeing from their cars.

RADIO: --because we've got word that there's a super scuffle going down!

DRIVER (small): Ohgeezohgeezohgeez...

5: Cut back inside the car. The DRIVER is fumbling with his seatbelt with one hand while his other hand is reaching for his briefcase in the other seat. He tries to get the seatbelt out, but it's stuck.

DRIVER: C'mon, don't do this to me...not now...

6: The DRIVER turns to his windshield and sees a car flying right towards him. As he gawks, a BLACK GLOVED HAND reaches through his door.

DRIVER (big): Oh--

7: The GLOVED HAND glows white and claps down on the DRIVER's shoulder.

PAGE 2:

1: Splash panel. A white aura surrounds the DRIVER as he is phased through his car in the nick of time. His rescuer is PHANTASMIC, the star of our story. He is a lanky teenager about 16 years old. His costume is very civilian in appearance, like he could wear it out on the streets after he finishes here. A white, short-sleeved hoodie with a zipper that ends at the middle of his chest; a sleeveless turtleneck with a reverse clerical collar (white with a black square in the center); white jogging pants with black seams running up the inside; white Converse high-tops; black gloves that end at the wrist; reverse domino mask (white mask with black lenses).

DRIVER (big): --GEEZ!

PH: Gotcha!

PAGE 3:

1: PHANTASMIC phases through the next car over, DRIVER in hand, as glass and metal fly out from the crash behind them. On the way through, he grabs the OTHER DRIVER, a woman in exercise gear and her hair in a ponytail.

OTHER DRIVER: Hey, what--

PH: Coming through, sorry!

DRIVER: My...my car...

2. When they pass through the other side, PHANTASMIC and the DRIVERS touch down on the sidewalk. The DRIVERS are discombobulated, but PHANTASMIC is amped with excitement.

OD: --was that?

DRIVER (small): Not again...

PH: Sorry about that--I thought you might want to get out of the splash zone before anything happened. Glass hurts a little more than water, or so I've been told.

3. PHANTASMIC turns back towards the action as more people run away. The DRIVER is shaking his head, and the OTHER DRIVER focuses on the retreating hero.

PH: All right, back to work. You folks get somewhere safe--The Cleaners can help you out with your car, sir.

DRIVER (small): This is just what I need...

OD: Wait! They'll need a name. Who are you?

4. PHANTASMIC turns around, flashes an old-school Superman wink and smile.

PH: Tell 'em you were saved by--

OFF-PANEL: Marineman!

5: Pan up, and we see MARINEMAN rocketing through the sky, leaving a trail of mist behind him. Combine the best elements of Superman and Aquaman, and then imagine he was played by Dean Cain. He wears a blue suit of chain mail on top, with a large golden M on a black diamond in the middle of his chest; dark blue chain mail leggings; golden boots; a black belt with a golden trident buckle; a flowing black cape with yellow lining inside. He has a determined look on his face, but he is not scowling like Batman--he wants to get the job done and put a stop to the trouble going down.

PHANTASMIC looks up in admiration, as do the civilians. They know that the day is safe, now that MARINEMAN is here!

RANDOM VOICE: All right, Marineman!

RV2: You got this, man! You got this!

RV3: I love you, Marineman!

MM: I love you too, ma'am, but you need to get to safety--

PAGE 4:

1. Cut to the scene of the crime, where we meet the culprit--LIGERTOOTH. He looks like a hairier Sabretooth: a tan and black-striped one-piece, without sleeves; no boots or gloves. He has fur-covered arms that end in clawed hands, and furry clawed feet. He has a long, dirty mane of hair, and whiskers so thick, his face is hard to make out. What can be seen best is his fang-filled mouth.

LIGERTOOTH is smashing anything within reach, which in this case, happens to be a number of superheroes. SHIELD BEARER, a Captain America type who has two large, triangular, badge-shaped shields covering his forearms; RAINBOW RING, a young woman with Green Lantern like abilities, who has a ring emblem on her chest; BALLER, a super-athlete decked out in futuristic lacrosse gear; CAKE QUEEN, a stout woman in a chef's uniform and domino mask, who wields a staff topped with a Twinkie; RATMAN, a Batman type with a similar costume, minus the cape; PIGEON, RATMAN's sidekick, a Robin type in a gray tunic and purple leotard with a black cape.

SHIELD BEARER is protecting himself with his shields; RAINBOW RING is shooting black lasers at LIGERTOOTH; BALLER is catching rubble in his lacrosse stick; CAKE QUEEN is making it rain cupcakes; RATMAN is scurrying around LIGERTOOTH, while PIGEON throws white goo bombs from a telephone pole.

CAP: --Ligertooth can be a handful!

LT: WHY AM I?! WHAT AM I?! HOW AM I?!

SB: I don't know if cupcakes are going to work, Queenie!

CQ: Nonsense! Nothing cures a bad mood quite like a sweet or three!

RR: Stop trying to make him happy, or my depress beams aren't going to work!

BL: I don't care if he's happy or depressed--someone needs to take him out before he does any more damage!

PG: Ratman and I are on it, Baller! Right, RM?

RM: (Mutters--word balloon should be filled with some sort of scribble)

2. Pan up to the sky, where three more superheroes are flying high above. KID PEGASUS, a teenage female winged centaur with a bow and magic arrows; THE CLOUD, a gaseous heroine whose lower body resembles a cloud; BEAT, a young man who resembles a DJ, who hovers in the air thanks to visible sound waves.

KP: We can take care of him from up here, right guys?

TC: Yes, up here...further from the fighting...

BEAT: At least you can phase through anything he throws, Cloud. Some of us don't have that privilege.

TC: I wouldn't call it a 'privilege', Beat.

3. Back on the ground, SHIELDBEARER blocks a blow from Ligertooth while punching him in the gut. He glances up at the air support with frustration. THE CLOUD and BEAT reply by throwing water balls and concussive sound waves, respectively, at LIGERTOOTH

SB: Less talking, more fighting!

TC & B (same): Yes, sir.

4. Suddenly, a giant sphere of water entraps LIGERTOOTH from the neck down. BALLER, RAINBOW RING, and PIGEON cheer, while RATMAN sulks nearby.

BL: Nice shot!

RR: Couldn't have done it better myself...maybe.

PG: You did it, Cloud!

RM: (Angry scribble again)

5. Cut back to CLOUD, who is nothing short of confused.

TC: Um...that wasn't me.

MM (off-panel): I know, Cloud...

6. MARINEMAN arrives on the scene, his hand glowing bright blue. The gathered heroes are appreciative and happy to see him, except for RATMAN, who hates everyone. The flying heroes lower towards the ground.

MM: ...that was me. I thought you all could use a hand wrapping things up here.

BEAT: I ain't gonna complain.

CQ: That's sweet of you, Marineman! Sweeter than a cupcake, you are.

PAGE 5:

1. MARINEMAN walks by everyone, giving them a friendly smile as he goes. He doesn't want to seem rude, even though there is a berserk LIGERTOOTH just outside the panel.

MM: Not as sweet as your cakes, Miss Queen.

SB: Glad you could drop by, sir. We were barely keeping up with him.

MM: Nonsense, lieutenant. I could hear you from a few miles away--you were doing a great job of containing ol' Liger.

PG: Hi! Hi, Marineman!

MM: Hey, Pigeon! Nice shots with those goo bombs!

PG: Thanks!

RM: (Angry scribbles)

MM: Nice to see you too, chum.

2. MARINEMAN comes face to face with LIGERTOOTH, who is struggling to get out of the bubble he is trapped in.

MM: Now, Ligertooth...let's you and me have a talk.

LT: Rip! Tear! Cut to shreds!

RR: Good luck with that, chief. The best we could get out of him were existential questions.

MM: Well, Rainbow Ring, there's no harm in trying to talk now.

3. When MARINEMAN addresses LIGERTOOTH, the giant calms down some.

MM: Vic? Vic, I need you to relax, buddy.

LT: Snikt and--huh? Wait...Marineman?

MM: Hey, Vic. You look like you're having a bad day.

LT: What do ya mean?

4. MARINEMAN gestures out to the damage in the road, and LIGERTOOTH looks surprised at how it got there.

LT: Oh...

MM: It's not pretty, Vic. Have you been taking your cholinesterase like the doctor said?

5. Cut back to MARINEMAN and LIGERTOOTH, who now looks ashamed.

LT: No...it's got the worst kind of aftertaste.

MM: Aftertaste or not, Vic, you need to take them. We want your memory to get better, right? So we don't have mornings like this?

LT (small): ...okay.

6. Cut back to PHANTASMIC and OTHER DRIVER, who are looking on in amazement as MARINEMAN handles the situation.

PH: Man, that's why the dude needs to be made a saint. I wouldn't be able to talk down a guy like that--best I could do is get snarky on him.

OD: I know, right? He's just about the nicest guy ever to do that.

PAGE 6:

1. PHANTASMIC and OTHER DRIVER grin as they share anecdotes with each other, while the first DRIVER is talking on his phone.

OD: Did you see that bit last week when Bloodsucker was draining power in the city--

PH: --and Marineman brought him a pizza to ease his hunger? Classic.

OD: So classic.

DRIVER (small): Incredible Insurance? I need some help...

2. As PHANTASMIC talks with OTHER DRIVER, he feels something vibrate in his pocket.

PH: Or how about when he got Thickhead to leave town just by playing catch with him?

OD: That was beautiful. I swear, I had tears in my eyes when I watched it on the news.

PH: Yeah, it was--hang on.

3. Close up on Phantasmic's hand as he pulls out his phone. The screen lights up with a message from WILL.

TEXT: Dude, first bell rang. Get here b4 Simpson kills you.

PH (off-panel): Dang it.

4. PHANTASMIC tucks his phone back in his pocket as OTHER DRIVER looks on.

OD: Something wrong?

PH: Nah--just have some place to be. You going to be all right till clean up gets here?

OD: I think they've got things covered from here, thanks.

PH: No problem.

5: PHANTASMIC lifts up into the air while OTHER DRIVER watches.

PH: Take it easy!

OD: Hey, I never got that name!

PH: Oh yeah...when the Cleaners get here, tell 'em you were saved by--

PAGE 7:

1. He can fly! PHANTASMIC shoots up into the air with a broad grin on his face.

PH: --PHANTASMIC!

2. OTHER DRIVER smiles as she watches the young hero fly away.

OD: Sweet hoodie.

3. PHANTASMIC flies through the air, leaving behind a faint trail of white energy. He flies with his arms streamlined above his head like a swimmer. Behind him, we can see the silhouettes of other super-beings, some big and some small.

4. Cut to the exterior of ST. LUCIA HIGH SCHOOL, our hero's alma mater. It is a relatively small campus, relying more on height than width and length. The entire school is contained to one building--students do not need to go outside to get to their next class. It is built on a slight slope, so that one section of the school has a lower floor while another has upper floors. When viewed from the street, the left side of the school (one third of the building) has a first floor and a 'basement' for locker rooms, storage, and a pool; the right side of the school (two thirds) has three floors for the offices, cafeteria, library, and classrooms. The only other building on campus is a one-story chapel, advertised by a cross adorning the side of the structure and stained glass windows.

PHANTASMIC is rocketing towards the top floor of the school, where his first class is waiting.

5. Profile shot of SLHS as PHANTASMIC phases through the walls and into a bathroom stall. He strips off his coat when he touches down on the floor, and exits the stall a changed man. Gone is the superhero--in his place is MICHAEL MENG, a Chinese-American boy of 16. He has a mop of black hair and a lanky body. He is wearing a school uniform consisting of a navy polo shirt and khaki pants, with white sneakers.

6. MICHAEL races among the various students trying to get to class. He knows he's on the verge of being late, and like many of us, he counts down in his head how much time he's got left before the final bell rings.

MM (thought-bubble): 10...9...8...7...

7. MICHAEL dashes towards a classroom labeled 'Room 314: Mrs. Simpson', just on the verge of closing.

MM (tb): 6...5...4...3...

PAGE 8:

1. He makes it in the nick of time! MICHAEL makes it in the classroom just before the bell rings and he pumps his fists in victory. The teacher, MRS. SIMPSON, is standing on the other side of the door--she is none too pleased that MICHAEL almost missed the bell again. MRS. SIMPSON is an older woman in her late 40s with a large build--she towers over MICHAEL. Her black hair is done back in a fierce bun. Her clothes are rather plain: black slacks and a red blouse.

MM (tb): 2...1...YES!

SFX: DING-DING-DING-DING, DING-DING-DING-DING!

MS: Nice of you to join us on time today, Mr. Meng.

2. MICHAEL flashes a grin at his teacher as he makes his way back to his seat. Of the students we can see, some are entertained and others are bored out of their minds. MRS. SIMPSON scowls as she shuts the door.

MM: Sorry, Mrs. Simpson. Got caught in traffic. You know, that whole Ligertooth thing?

MS: Oh, I know. I also know that everyone else who was there managed to get here well in advance.

MM: What can I say? I'm a swimmer, not a runner.

3. MRS. SIMPSON glowers as MICHAEL retreats to his seat. The door is completely shut, and SIMPSON throws the lock.

MS: Just find your seat, Mr. Meng, and get your books from Mr. Prince.

MM: Yes, ma'am.

4. There is a knock on the door and the door handle jiggles--someone is trying to get in. MRS. SIMPSON notices this with disapproval.

MS: At least you're not the last person to get here, Mr. Meng.

5. MICHAEL takes his seat between WILL PRINCE, his best friend, and GEORGIA SPITERI, the secret identity of KID PEGASUS. WILL looks like a young Christian Bale--handsome, gaunt face, with finely combed hair. He's wearing a white polo shirt underneath a red hoodie and khaki pants. GEORGIA, the human part of her, has olive skin and dark brown hair. She is wearing glasses, a white, short-sleeved button-up blouse that reaches all the way to her horse body. The horse part of her is milky white, but covered by a set of black pants that reach all over her save for her tail and the bottom half of her legs.

WILL hands MICHAEL his book bag while GEORGIA scribbles in her notebook.

MM: 'Sup, Will. Thanks for the heads up.

WP: No problem, man. Figured you were busy with things.

MM: Yeah...gridlock like crazy. Hey Georgia.

GS: Hey Mike.

6. MICHAEL fishes for his notebook while he glances at GEORGIA. Somehow, no one recognizes the resident centaur is also KID PEGASUS. When he compliments her, she gives him a slight grin.

MM: You get some new glasses?

GS: Sure did.

MM: They look nice.

GS: Thanks!

MS (offpanel): Congratulations, Mr. Rogers--

PAGE 9

1. Cut to MRS. SIMPSON up front, as she berates a tardy student--FREDDY ROGERS. He is a white boy the same age as MICHAEL and his classmates (16/17), has unkempt brown hair, and dressed very sloppily. His uniform shirt is untucked, his pants have various stains, and both are ill-fitting. When MRS. SIMPSON talks down to him, FREDDY rolls his eyes.

MS: --you're late again. Care to explain why?

FR: Locker trouble, I guess.

MS: You "guess"?

FR: Yeah, I think that's what it was. Or maybe it was car trouble.

2. MRS. SIMPSON gestures to FREDDY's awful uniform, which he barely registers.

MS: And your uniform! I don't think there's a single part of the code that you aren't breaking!

FR: No cargo pants, no short shorts, no halter tops, no flip-flops...

3. Close up on teacher and student. SIMPSON is at her boiling point, and FREDDY has a smug look about him.

MS: You must really want to go to the office, Mr. Rogers.

FR: Beats being here, where I already know everything.

4. Staring contest! SIMPSON glares, FREDDY has half-lid eyes.

5. SIMPSON points to a desk and snarls while FREDDY makes his way across the room.

MS: Take your seat, Rogers. I'll be seeing you at lunch.

FR (small): Whatever.

MS: Excuse me

FR: I said "Whatever".

MS: That's what I thought. See me after school as well.

6. Cut back to MICHAEL, WILL, and GEORGIA. WILL is chuckling at the exchange, while MICHAEL and GEORGIA have nervous smiles on.

GS: Every freaking day.

MS (op): Mr. Meng, you will also see me at lunch.

MM (small): Crud.

MM (normal): Yes, ma'am.

WP: Never gets old. You'd think a guy that smart would learn his lesson the first time...

PAGE 10:

1. Class finally gets started. SIMPSON hands out graded tests to every student, while MICHAEL keeps an eye on FREDDY.

MM (thought bubble): Yeah...what is Freddy thinking, doing that kind of stuff? Does he really think he can get by on brains alone?

2. Split. FREDDY gets his test back--100% correct. MICHAEL gets his back--81%.

MM (tb): Great. How fair is that--I study my butt off for this, and I get an 81. He probably hocked his textbook, and he aced it...

3. FREDDY smirks as he crumples up his test, while MICHAEL scowls and grips his in his fist.

MM (tb): Yeah, you keep smirking, jerkweed. Participation is ten percent of your final grade, Freddy Rogers! Ten percent!

4. Cut to later in the class, and the students have broken up into work groups. MICHAEL is seated with WILL, DAISY, MONICA, and CLAY. DAISY is a diminutive, heavy-set red-head; MONICA is an averagely tall black girl with glasses; CLAY is a stone-faced white boy with a buzzed head. Their desks are bunched together, and they are working out math equations on a large empty sheet of paper. Off-panel, PAUL, another student, is getting angry at FREDDY.

DAISY: --and that's when you divide. Just like that.

MM: Yep...still doesn't make any sense.

MONICA: Come on, Mike--don't you remember 'Please Excuse My Dear Aunt Sally'?

CLAY: You ever wonder what we're excusing her for?

WP: An age-old question.

PAUL (op): Aw, for--Freddy!

5. Cut to FREDDY'S group, consisting of PAUL, RACHEL, JENNY, and STEPHEN. PAUL is a large, imposing blonde; RACHEL is a thin, stringy-haired dirty blonde; JENNY is a tiny brunette; STEPHEN is a gangly boy with glasses. While the other four are clearly working together, FREDDY is scribbling in his notebook. None of them are happy that he is not contributing.

PAUL: Could you pretend to care and help us out with this?

FR: Nah, too much effort.

PAUL: So you're just going to sit there drawing or writing or whatever?!

FR: Pretty much, yeah.

RACHEL: Gawd, why are you such a jerk, Freddy?

FR: Society. Television, mostly.

JENNY (small): Tool...

STEPHEN (small): Agreed.

PAGE 11:

1. Cut to later in the day, when FREDDY and MICHAEL are stuck in lunch detention with SIMPSON. The two of them are eating school lunches, which consist of a chicken sandwich, a small salad, and a bottle of water. MICHAEL is keeping his desk neat and tidy, while FREDDY has spread everything out over his desktop. Nothing but uncomfortable silence between the two as they eat.

CAP: Later...

2. SIMPSON glowers at the two as she picks at her own meal, some spaghetti in a tupperware container.

MS: All right, gentlemen, let's talk about your tardiness, among other things, Mr. Rogers. It is ridiculous how many times the two of you have been tardy or late to my class, the first class of your day. How hard can it be to make it on time?

3. The teacher looks over the two students, who could not be more different in their reply. MICHAEL is giving an earnest answer, not wanting to anger SIMPSON any more, while FREDDY could care less what happens.

MS: Do you think my class is really so unimportant that you can show up whenever you want? Don't answer the question, Rogers.

FR: You know me so well, Margaret.

MM: I want to be on time for class, Mrs. Simpson, I do. It's just...I've got a lot of things I have to do in the day.

4. SIMPSON picks up her fork and points it at MICHAEL.

MS: I know that, Mr. Meng. You've got swim team, other classes, and the--what's the club again?

MM: Dimension Club, ma'am. We talk about--

MS: --the discovery and study of new dimensions. I've heard Mr. Morrison mention it. I can appreciate having a healthy schedule, but I need you to understand that it does not give you any excuses in being late to my class. You don't get to be late all the time in the real world.

5. MICHAEL nods his head in understanding, and almost shame, as SIMPSON wraps up her lecture. FREDDY scoffs at the sight.

MM: I know, Mrs. Simpson.

MS: If something is keeping you from being on time, you will need to make time. Do I make myself clear?

MM: Yes, ma'am.

FR (small): Pansy.

MS: And you, Mr. Rogers...

PAGE 12:

1. SIMPSON points her fork at FREDDY, who slouches in his chair as he munches on his sandwich.

MS: You are, without a doubt, one of the worst students I have ever had. I mean that with all sincerity.

FR: That's funny, because I've been thinking you're one of the worst teachers I've ever had.

MS: You have been treading on thin ice since the first day you walked in here. I thought you could not possibly be as difficult as they made you out to be, but here we are.

2. SIMPSON narrows into a glare as she tries to burn holes in FREDDY.

MS: Tell me, Mr. Rogers, what makes you think you have the right to act this way? You think that because you are smart that you can behave like a slob and a jerk to everyone around you? I have news for you: it does not. You keep this up, and you will find out soon enough that all your knowledge will get you nowhere if you continue like this.

FR (op): Is that right?

MS: It is. One day, you're going to be wasting away in a mediocre job because you have no personal skills, because you have been kicked out of every institute by everyone you insulted. And your good grades, your science fair prizes, will mean nothing.

3. FREDDY leans over and brushes wrappers off his desktop so he can rest his elbow there. He points his sandwich at SIMPSON.

FR: Let me tell you how things are going to play out for me, Margaret. I see the top universities throwing scholarships my way so they can have a genius like me to help bring up their averages. I'll also qualify for financial aid scholarships, so all in all, my college life will be taken care of. Sounds pretty nice compared to the student loan you had to pay off, no doubt.

4. MICHAEL is both uncomfortable and furious as FREDDY glances his way.

FR: I'll intern with the best of the best, shake hands with the right people, and before I've even graduated, I'll be offered a position with the top laboratories in the country. Meanwhile, my less capable classmates will be struggling with their finals and finding themselves unemployed, living in rathole apartments if they're lucky.

5. Cut to SIMPSON, who has the deepest scowl you can imagine as FREDDY talks off-panel.

FR (op): Then, after breezing through graduate school and landing a chief position in a lab in Switzerland, I'll be offered the chance to come back to St. Lucia's to give a speech to inspire the next generation of students. They will, of course, never reach my level, but I can give them the fleeting hope. I'll look out in the audience, and there you'll be--gray hair, wrinkles all over your sad face, still wearing those cheap clothes.

6. FREDDY wipes his mouth, and from behind the napkin, we see the corner of his lips turned up in a smirk.

FR: And your detentions, your lectures...will mean nothing.

PAGE 13:

1. FREDDY gets up from his seat, balling up the wrapper for his chicken sandwich.

FR: Sounds pretty good to me. I can just see my face on MILLENNIUM MAGAZINE--they'll name me 'Person of the Year'. I'll give them a great rags to riches story, and the people will love me.

2. As he tosses his wrapper in the trash, FREDDY leaves out the classroom door.

FR: Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to use the bathroom. Try not to miss me too much.

3. SIMPSON and MICHAEL share a sideways glance with each other.

SFX: SLAM!

4. Teacher and student turn towards each other.

MS: Mr. Meng, I will raise your final grade by ten points if you promise not to wind up like him.

MM: Deal.

5. As MICHAEL goes back to picking at his lunch, he has a vivid daydream. PHANTASMIC is imitating the cover of ACTION COMICS #1, lifting a car over his head and about to smash it down on FREDDY.

MM (tb): Nah, I couldn't do that...there's no way I could lift up a car.

PAGE 14:

1. Cut to a SWIMMING POOL. School has long since let out for the day, and it's time for practice at the school pool. The pool is divided up into six lanes and a diving well. There are two sets of bleachers five rows tall--the bleachers are covered with backpacks and towels. COACH MARCUS stands at the poolside, shouting words of encouragement to the swimmers. He is a tall, lanky man with a slick pompadour, a red polo shirt, and black track pants, and sneakers.

CM: All right, that's good, that's good! Drew, stretch those arms out--really reach for it. Jenny, fix that hand--you're trying to stroke, not claw the water! Bradley, keep your legs straight!

2. Cut to one of the lanes, where we see MICHAEL practicing the breaststroke. He is wearing a black jammer, a black cap, and a pair of white goggles. He is frustrated with how slow the swimmer is in front of him, and FREDDY'S lingering comments.

MM (tb): 'Less capable'...give me a break. So I don't get straight As on my tests--big deal!

3. MICHAEL dives down underwater, swims underneath the person in front of him, and pops out ahead without missing a beat.

MM (tb): Could someone 'less capable' do this?

4. MICHAEL reaches the wall and grabs on with both hands.

MM (tb): I think not!

5. MICHAEL pushes himself up and out of the water as another swimmer walks by. This is CARRIE ELLIOT, a freshman on the swim team. She has Polynesian looks, with curly brown hair on her head. She has a trim, petite body with very few curves, and her swimsuit is a standard, navy-colored one piece. When she greets MICHAEL, she greets him with a smile and a wave.

MM: Hup!

CE: Hey Michael! Good job tonight.

6. MICHAEL glances up and grins as he catches his breath. CARRIE stops to chat.

MM: Thanks, Carrie...you were doing pre...pretty good yourself.

CE: Aw, thanks! I'm just trying to keep up with everyone else. You're all so fast--it's awesome, really.

MM: You're getting pretty fast...keep it up, I'm sure Marcus will put you in more meets.

CE: You think so? Oh man, that would be great!

PAGE 15:

1. MICHAEL and CARRIE walk over to their bags, along with other students finishing up their cool down laps. MICHAEL has a sports drink with him, and he takes a healthy gulp as he walks.

CE: Well, we do have another meet coming up in a couple of weeks.

MM: Mm-hm...

CE: And I was thinking...maybe you could give me some help?

MM: Hmm?

2. CARRIE reaches her bag first, and fishes out a towel while MICHAEL stands by.

CE: It's just that you're pretty good. Like, really pretty good. So maybe you could give me some help during practice--that way, Coach could put me in the meet!

MM: What do you need help with?

CE: Y'know, stuff you need to know for meets...starts, flip-turns, good strokes...things like that.

3. MICHAEL agrees as he reaches his own bag, and CARRIE's smile broadens while she ruffles her hair with her towel.

MM: Sure! Happy to help.

CE: Awesome! Thank you so much!

MM: I mean, I'm not the best on the team, but--

CE: No no, I think you're great! Like...

MM:--really pretty great?

CE: Yeah.

4: MICHAEL takes his bag up as he waves goodbye to CARRIE and heads off to the nearby locker rooms.

MM: Next time we get free swim, you come get me and we'll practice.

CE: Thanks, Michael! See you on Wednesday!

MM: See ya, Carrie!

5. As he heads into the locker room, MICHAEL hangs his bag over his shoulder.

MM: Well, that made my night a little better. Weird though--Carrie's got good form already. Wonder what she thinks she needs help with...

6. MICHAEL stops at a locker and pops it open as other swimmers filter in behind him.

MM: What does it matter? If she wants your help, dingus, you should help her.

PAGE 16:

1. MICHAEL looks inside his locker for a moment, realizes something, and sighs. One of the other swimmers, a tanned redhead named ROBBIE, looks on as he throws on some sweatpants.

MM: Ground control to Major--aw, crap.

ROBBIE: S'matter, Mike?

MM: I just remembered: I left my math binder up in my other locker.

ROBBIE: Oh man...Simpson won't like that.

MM: No kidding.

2. MICHAEL takes his swim bag and book bag, and heads toward one of the stalls.

ROBBIE (op): Nothing you can do, I guess.

MM: Guess not.

MM (tb): Except there totally is!

3. When he gets inside the stall, MICHAEL reaches into his swim bag and pulls out a white hoodie--the same one he wears as PHANTASMIC.

MM (tb): I'd say this qualifies as a job for Phantasmic. Demons and aliens have got nothing on an angry math teacher.

4. MICHAEL throws the coat on and is enveloped by a white light.

MM (tb): I wonder if Marineman ever had to sneak into school to get his homework...

5. When the light fades, MICHAEL has transformed into PHANTASMIC, costume and all.

PH (tb): But I guess they can't all be Ligertooth-level problems. That would be pretty rough.

6. PHANTASMIC picks up his bags and turns his head to the ceiling. He starts to de-materialize into white wisps of light, which float off the panel and into the margins of the pages, up towards PANEL 1 of PAGE 17.

PAGE 17

1. Cut to a dark hallway filled with lockers and classrooms. The wisps from PANEL 6, PAGE 16 reconvene here and reform into PHANTASMIC. He drops off the two bags on the floor.

PH: All right, gotta make this quick--I'm starving. The janitors should be all gone by now, so this should be a piece of cake.

2. PHANTASMIC floats down the hallway, illuminating the way with a ball of white light in his hand.

PH: Man, it's so weird being here without everyone sitting around and talking. Let's see...that's where Christie and her friends cut off traffic...that's where Devon hands out Blue Rams...

3. When he reaches his locker, 3126, PHANTASMIC sets down on the ground.

PH: Boom! Man, it's so much easier to get here without Brandon and Kelly blocking the way.

4. Just before he can phase his hand through the locker, PHANTASMIC notices the shine of a flashlight in one of the classrooms further down the hall.

PH: Gee, what's my combination again? Oh right: it doesn't matter! Just gotta--huh?

5. PHANTASMIC floats towards the classroom, lights out this time.

PH (tb): I thought everyone went home already. Who'd still be up here...and why?

6. As he nears the door, PHANTASMIC edges closer to the wall so he can keep an ear out. Someone is speaking inside, with a scratchy voice. Though we cannot see him yet, this is ROACH.

RO (op, rough): Think they can still talk to me like that? These fools have no idea what a science major can really do! They're all a bunch of pinheads who cannot imagine someone can be better than them by wits and brains alone...

PH (tb): That's not something you ever want to hear.

PAGE 18

1. PHANTASMIC phases through the classroom wall, still invisible, and catches ROACH in the middle of drilling a hole in the wall with his index finger. ROACH looks something like a mix between Kamen Rider and Spider-man. Bronze-colored insect-like helmet with antennae and large lenses for the eyes; mouthpiece decorated with mandibles; bronze-colored body armor covering the front of the torso, shoulders, and top of the arms; black around the sides and under the arms; bronze-colored belt; bronze stripes running down the front of the leg and boots; black around sides and back; large wings adorn back.

RO: Let's see how much you mock me when your classroom is filled with my pets! You won't be laughing then...not when you're busy screaming in terror!

PH: Yeah, that's definitely not something you ever want to hear.

2. PHANTASMIC solidifies and turns materializes, while gaining ROACH'S attention. The criminal spins around in surprise.

PH: 'Scuse me--

RO: What-who?!

PH: --but the school is closed. You'll have to come back in the morning.

3. ROACH points at PHANTASMIC, who shrugs it off with a smirk.

RO: And just who are you supposed to be?!

PH: Would you believe I'm the ghost of a student, doomed to walk these halls for eternity?

RO: Seriously?

PH: Nah, I'm just messing with you. I'm just here to bust you for whatever it was you were planning.

4. At that, ROACH rears back into a defensive stance.

RO: You won't be busting anyone tonight! I didn't build this suit and plan out my revenge just to have it ruined by some glowing hipster!

PH: Whoa, let's not get ugly about this. Just put your hands up and I'll drop you off at the police station.

5. Close-up on ROACH'S belt as he reaches a hand down to it. PHANTASMIC spots this and his hand lights up with energy.

PH: Hey, hey! Hands up, dude. Don't make me have to get rough.

RO: I already told you--

PAGE 19

1. Extreme close-up on ROACH'S belt as it opens up in the middle and dozens of tiny lights appear.

2. Wide shot as TONS OF ROBOT COCKROACHES fly out of ROACH'S belt. PHANTASMIC recoils and his glowing hand leaves a light trail.

RO: --I'M NOT GOING ANYWHERE!

PH: Holy Galaxus!

3. PHANTASMIC dances away from the intrusion of cockroaches, which fly and skitter around him.

PH: What are these things?! Are these real? You were keeping cockroaches in your pants?!

4. ROACH stands back with his fists on his hips and gloats.

RO: You dolt! These are my robo-roaches! They are technological marvels that obey every order I, ROACH, give them! They can change direction at the drop of a hat and eat their way through anything. There has never been a robot like them!

5. PHANTASMIC flies away from the bugs, keeping just ahead of the intrusion, while ROACH schemes off-panel.

RO (op): I was going to use them for a harmless prank to scare some idiots, but now I've got an even better idea...

6. Close-up on ROACH as he sticks his hand out. The antennae on his helmet vibrate as he sends his command to the robo-roaches.

RO: Robo-roaches--kill that super-fool!

PAGE 20

1. PHANTASMIC flies a desk as he tries to avoid the roaches. He can only maneuver so fast, and they are gaining on him.

PH (tb): Can't fly around these things forever...but I refuse to die by being eaten by a bunch of cockroaches! There's got to be some way to get away from these things.

2. Suddenly, realization dawns on PHANTASMIC. Close-up as he remembers what his powers are.

PH (tb): Oh, right!

3. PHANTASMIC pauses in the middle of the air, just before the intrusion gets to him.

4. When the insects reach PHANTASMIC, they pass right through his intangible body, Kitty Pryde-style. He smirks triumphantly as they pass.

5. The robo-roaches crash into a nearby wall, giving PHANTASMIC the chance to gloat.

PH: I love you, ghost powers!

PAGE 21

1. PHANTASMIC turns back to ROACH, who has reeled back into a defensive stance.

PH: Looks like your bugs aren't so special, Roach. They can't even touch me, much less kill me.

RO: Rrr...I suppose this requires a different approach...

2. ROACH whips his arm out, revealing a small nozzle at the top of his wrist.

RO: Gas attack!

3. A large stream of yellow gas shoots out of the nozzle, right at PHANTASMIC. Our hero braves it though, thinking he can phase through it again.

PH: You must not be that smart. I'm intangible, Roach! That means nothing can touch me, not even--

4. Close-up on PHANTASMIC'S face as the gas envelops him and starts to choke him.

PH: --GAHK!

5. PHANTASMIC collapses to the floor, clutching his throat in desperation, while ROACH slinks over to him.

RO: Serves you right for questioning my intelligence, fool. Even if you are intangible to physical matter, you must surely breathe, or else you wouldn't be babbling on. Looks like you're not so special...

6. ROACH crouches down to eye-level with PHANTASMIC, who is going red in the face.

RO: Did you know that cockroaches can create allergens just like animals? That's what's suffocating you now--the remains of cockroaches. You're having the mother of all asthma attacks.

7. Close-up on the two as ROACH leans in close.

RO: Anything last words before your throat closes up?

PH (small): See ya...

PAGE 22

1. Pan out as PHANTASMIC suddenly vanishes, leaving only wisps of white light.

2. ROACH springs back up and glances frantically around the room.

RO: Invisibility?! That's the best you can do? I'll find you by the sounds of your cough!

3. Wide shot as PHANTASMIC, as wisps, floats through the wall before reappearing in a bathroom. ROACH throws his arms up in the air in rage.

RO: You can't hide forever!

4. PHANTASMIC turns on the faucet and splashes water in his face.

PH: HAKK! HOKK! HUKK!

5. After washing away the effects of the gas, PHANTASMIC glares in the mirror.

PH: All right...you want to fight? You've got it...

PAGE 23

1. ROACH scours the classroom, his cockroaches searching where he cannot.

RO: You must be holding your breath. I wonder how much longer you can last before you need that gulp of air?

2. Suddenly, PHANTASMIC phases through the board in the classroom. He's fighting mad now, and he's flying fists-first.

PH: Pretty long!

RO: What?!

3. The two collide with each other and they go flying into the nearby desks.

SFX: CRRRASH!

4. ROACH is lying on the ground, while PHANTASMIC lifts himself up.

PH: Urk...yeah, that's what you get. I told you I didn't want to get rough.

5. PHANTASMIC reaches over and grabs at the underside of ROACH'S helmet.

PH: Now, who are you under there?

RO: Rrr...

PAGE 24

1. PHANTASMIC reveals the face underneath the helmet--it's FREDDY ROGERS! His face is contorted in pain, but it is unmistakably him.

PH: Wha--Freddy??

2. Our hero glances at the mask in his hand, then back down at his fallen foe. Pure confusion crosses his face.

3. PHANTASMIC drops the mask and sits down.

PH: So you're a supervillain...can't say I'm surprised, but...

4. PHANTASMIC lolls his head back.

PH: Oh geez...

CAP: TO BE CONTINUED...