Nightmare Wedding

1000 Words

"I would never get married somewhere like this," I said to my husband, who was watching the bride walk down the makeshift aisle. "But to each their own, I suppose. I just don't see why our son has to marry someone who is trailer trash."

"Shh" My husband was not as accustomed to the finer things in life, like I was. To him a wedding in the local burger joint was acceptable, hell in his family it was even encouraged. My parents however were turning over in their graves, or they would be if they were dead. Instead I had them shuttled off to a home far away, where they could no longer embarrass me. That was one of the benefits of having money, you didn't have to deal with problems. Except the girl that my son decided to marry for some reason.

"Do you take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife?" The Pastor asked my son. I had to do something, I had to stop this travesty. There was no way in hell that I was going to let this wedding end with my son being married to that harlot.

"Would you like ketchup with the bride?" I asked loud enough for everyone to turn to see me. I stood up, and made my way to the end of the table that I was seated at. My husband grabbed at me but there was no way that I was going to be stopped. "What are you really doing Kevin? I mean really? This girl is not the right woman for you. She is making you get married in a greasy hamburger joint, where most people wouldn't even eat."

"Mother, sit down. This was the place where we had our first date. I am the one who choose it, not Mary. Now please sit down and let us finish the ceremony." My son's sass would end up costing him his monthly allowance. Especially if he followed through with this wedding.

"I will not sit down. There is no way that you are marrying this piece of trash. No we are going to leave right now, and get lunch at a nice restaurant and talk about why this decision was made. For months now I have hoped that you would come to your senses and get rid of this tramp. However, you are clearly as stupid as your father, so I am forced to take charge and put an end to this."

"Mother, stop. I love Mary, and she loved me. That's what matters, nothing else. That's what Dad always taught me. He married you, despite the warnings he got from his parents and you guys have been happily married for almost 30 years."

"Happily is being very generous, I haven't loved your father since he proposed but divorce is just not an option. He would get way too much of my father's hard earned money. Just like this tramp is trying to do. Then only reason that she wants to marry you is because you are rich, love has nothing to do with this."

There was no rational reason for Mary to attack me the way she did. The Bride threw a salt and pepper shaker at my head. As it hurtled towards me, I ducked and did what any reasonable person would do; I grabbed the ketchup bottle. Somehow the contents squirted out, the contents didn't quite reach her. I crawled closer to her, and squeezed the bottle again. This time it got all over her white dress. It made me smile to realize that the dress was ruined and whoever she rented it from would not give her the deposit back. My victory was even sweeter because I hadn't given a dime for this hellish nightmare of a wedding.

In quick secession, it seemed like all of the other guests were involved in a food fight. Condiments were being sprayed everywhere, I slipped on some mayonnaise as Mary advanced on me. A burger hit me on the back of the head, and I was positive that my husband had been the one to throw it. I would make sure to freeze one of his credit cards later.

There was no time to think about that because Mary was advancing on me. The crazy trollop hit me with an open fist, across my face. It stung on my cheeks for a nanosecond before I reacted. Not that I am proud of what I did but my survival instincts kicked in and I pulled her hair. To my astonishment, it came out. So I did what any upstanding member of the community would do, I hit Mary with her own hair.

"You bitch!" Mary screamed as she held out her hands as if she was going to strangle me. Only trash used words like that. Why wasn't my son or husband trying to stop this monster from hurting me? My breath was becoming short as she tightened her grip on my throat. Even though everyone else was fighting, I was still careful not to do anything to make myself or my family look bad. Then like a slice of Heaven, a police officer pulled her off of me.

"You have the right to remain silent," The Officer said to Mary, she screamed an obscenity that no lady should ever say. Another officer came over to me, and tried to get me to put my hands behind my back.

"I was the victim, not the assailant. Why would you arrest me?" He looked off to someone who obviously confirmed that I should not be arrested. My husband was one of the people that the police were carting to the van waiting outside of the restaurant. Kevin was sitting in a booth with his head between his hands.

To my supreme happiness, my son and Mary ended up breaking up. She tried to blame me at her trial but the judge wouldn't hear of it. Kevin never did thank me for stopping that wedding.