Chapter
2- The Routine
The
tile floor is cold on my bare feet as I mentally auto pilot through
the first hour of my day. I am practically sleeping still and only
come to myself when I get halfway through my first cup of coffee and
have got my laptop open in front of me. I look to the small clock in
the corner of my computer screen and see that it's almost 3:30 in
the afternoon and I still have accomplished nothing. I get up from
the small cluttered desk in my room and throw myself into my bed once
more. My pillow smells of cigarettes, sweat, and beer drool, sure
signs that I didn't do anything different last night. After leaving
high school my days in college have consisted of going to school for
4 days a week successfully cutting myself off from any social
interaction, to the 3 days of being drug along by the few close
friends I have to different parties, "kickbacks", and emotional
circle jerks consisting of 4 drunk guys revealing way too much about
their lives over a bottle of poor quality whiskey or a case of cheap
beer. I look around my bed for my phone knowing that I must have
thrown it somewhere last night in my drunken stupor. I find it stuck
between the wall and the head side of my bed. Of course it cracked
across the front of it, just my luck, which will be fun explaining to
my mom and Gary.
Apparently
my phones been ringing all morning because I have 8 missed calls from
Tony. I clear my notifications and grab a towel to hop in the shower
just as it rings again. For fucks sake, I silence it for a moment and
turn on the shower. As I run into my room to grab a change of boxers
before my shower I hear my phone ring once again. Frustrated, I
answer the call. "What Tony?" The sound of his east coast accent
ring through my speaker of my phone like nails on a chalkboard. Tony
is the best friend I have but his constant positive attitude and
excited demeanor get old really quick. Tony likes to live his life at
a 10, as for me, I prefer to stay at about a 4 maybe 5 if I'm
feeling extra excited.
"Derek!
What the fuck man I've been calling you all morning dude. Guess who
came back to my house with me!" I fall back onto my bed knowing I'm
not going to make it off this phone call without a 30 minute play by
play of how he made it to 2nd
base with some broad he just met. I sigh into the phone before
answering to hopefully throw him the signal I want this phone call to
be a fast one. "What lucky girl was it this time my dude?" Tony
clears his throat making it even clearer that he is really satisfied
with himself. "Well you know Aurora right?" Just as those words
come off his mouth I let a small laugh out that silences him
instantly. "What's so fuckin funny Derek?" I respond
hesitantly, "Isn't that the bitch with the green hair and the
spray tan?" Tony quickly responds defensively, "yeah, so what?
She's at least an 8 asshole!"
For
the sake of ending this phone call and not making him any more pissed
off I decide to agree with him. "Yeah man I suppose your right."
Tony is instantly filled with a false sense of confidence and
continues his story. He goes into the deepest detail about how close
she sat to him when he brought her home to watch a movie, how she
told him his glasses are cute, and how by the end of a long night of
kissing ass he got the great experience of copping a feel. For the
sake of messing with him I ask him the one question we both know I
know the answer too. "Well did you use a rubber at least you
savage?" Listening to Tony stutter his way to around saying he
didn't have sex with her was worth the extra 5 minutes he kept me
on the phone.
After
listening to him explain himself for a few minutes I realize I've
been running the shower this whole time and Gary is standing outside
the restroom door with his arms crossed tapping his foot loudly
expressing his irritation with me. I look at him and can't help but
smirk, I act like I don't see Gary out of the corner of my eye and
tell Tony, "Hey man my crybaby stepfather will blow a vein in his
head if I waste anymore hot water so I got to go dude." I see Gary
turn away and slam the bathroom door behind him. Tony laughs "Okay
dude, don't forget that we got invited to Aurora's friends party
tonight." Dammit, I forgot that he told these girls we would go to
their house party tonight and I am not excited about it. "Of course
dude I've got to shower, hit the bank and then I'll roll through
your casa after." After I hang up the phone I walk back to the
restroom and pull a note off the door. "You don't pay the gas
bill, take cold showers if you're going to waste water." I ball
up the note and toss it into the bathroom garbage, I undress and
climb into the once again steaming hot shower.
After
I shower, I throw on some clothes and slide out the front door of my
house unnoticed. The hot air almost immediately covers me with a thin
layer of sweat before even reaching my car. As I sit in the driver's
seat of my 1997 Honda Civic I throw the sunglasses from my cup holder
onto my face and turn my A/C onto full power. Looking down to my gas
gauge I see that my gas lights on and look down to my phone. After
responding to a few text messages, double checking my checking
account balance, and sulking in the cool air I drive off quickly out
of my neighborhood waving to the small group of kids all riding their
bikes and scooters four houses down.
As
I pull up to the ATM I see a familiar car in the spot behind me with
no one in it. I scan around looking for the soul sucking face of my
ex-girlfriend and see no one. I walk up to the ATM and put my debit
card into it. As I go on to pull out 250 dollars from my bank
account, I can hear the high pitched, attitude filled voice of Hannah
ringing out of the doorway of the bank into her cell phone. I lean
into the ATM and turn just a little more away from her in hopes she
doesn't notice me. Her talking grows louder and closer, then
suddenly stops. I hear her grow quieter and then say "Hey I will
call you in just a few minutes, I am going into the bank again real
quick." Which was an obvious lie as I turn to dart towards my car
and am stopped by her tall menacing presence.
"Oh,
hey Derek I didn't see you there, I didn't even realize you had
Wells Fargo" Once again a very obvious lie because we went together
when we got tired of another banks terrible service. I stand there
not knowing what to say and I just want to walk to my car without
even acknowledging her existence. I am on the spot now and she is
staring at me waiting for some response, I look around and then back
at her. I just talk back without any thought of what I'm saying.
"Yeah I do, what are doing tonight? You should come to this party
Tony is dragging me too." Instantly, a huge smile comes over her
face. "Is it that girl Aurora's party? I'll be there ill text
you later!" She turns back and walks to her car. I stand there in
front of the ATM shaming myself for what I just did. I don't want
to see that succubus again, what was I thinking? I face palm myself
and notice that the ATM is now beeping at me to take my debit card
from the slot. I grab it quickly and hop back in my car.
As
I pull up to Tony's place I hear him and his dad, Frank, yelling at
each other. This is nothing new though. Every day Tony is caught
smoking in his room, weighing out his small bags of weed, or leaving
roaches in his garage. His parents don't even have a problem with
him smoking weed but he likes to blatantly disrespect the few rules
they have regarding it. It's like he wants them to fight with him
so he has a reason to be rebellious. I step from my car and walk
towards the garage already laughing as I see Tony attempting to act
tough towards his dad. As I walk up to them I pull the pack of
cigarettes from my back pocket and put one in my mouth.
Frank
sees me first and instantly points to me, "See that tony, smoking
OUTSIDE, is it that hard to grasp you hard headed bastard?!" I
light the cigarette and laugh at them, I quietly greet them both.
"Hey Frank, how you been?" He instantly stops yelling and turns
to me with an embarrassed smile. "I've been alright Derek, just
working and dealing with this shithead. How about yourself?" Tony
begins to speak and his dad turns and throws the ashtray from the
workbench in the garage at Tony hitting him square in the four head.
"What the fuck dad?" Tony exclaims. Frank shoots his son a stern
look and says "I was talking to Derek and you were trying to cut
him off, why don't you shut up and put the ashtray where it
belongs?" I can't help but laugh again, I finally acknowledge
Tony myself and reach my hand out to him. "Here man, I'll take
the ashtray I'm going to need it for the ashes anyways." Tony
instantly gives me an irritated look just as I hear Frank speak up
again. "See look at that Tony, and he uses the god damn ash tray,
shit I think I might just take him in and kick your ass out boy." I
laugh even harder this time but finally come to Tony's defense.
"Ah, come on Frank you know you'll miss that smiling face over
there." Tony flips me the bird and walks the ashtray over to me.
Frank sits back into his chair and laughs.
After
a few minutes of small talk with Tony's dad I hear the familiar
tone of "The Thrill" by Wiz Khalifa play from Tony's phone.
This was his special ringtone for our pot dealers, people who hit him
up for weed, or anybody he wouldn't answer the phone for around his
grandmother. Tony walks from the garage for a moment and then returns
with a serious face, "Alright you ready to go?" I look over to
him and then back to his dad, "You know I was born ready." Frank
laughs and stands up. "You be safe tonight you guys, no cops, no
bullshit. I'm not picking your drunk assess up more than once in a
week." I leave the pack of cigarettes from my shirt pocket on the
coffee table and point down to them as I walk away from the garage.
"My boy! You know you have always been my favorite." Tony turns
back towards the garage with a smile on his face. "Thanks dad, Love
you too." Instantly Frank barks at Tony, "I wasn't talking to
you ass hat!" Tony turns back around and throws his middle finger
over his shoulder to his dad. "Save it for a lonely night son!"
Frank exclaims as he grabs the cigarettes and slips inside the house.
Tony
gets in the passenger seat of my car and slams the door behind him,
"I don't get why my dad's such a douche to me but so cool to
you." I scroll through my phone searching for music to put on and
answer. "I don't know man, maybe because you're an asshole?"
tony looks at me seriously for a moment then laughs, " Well he can
kiss my ass until he finally gets me the car I was promised like 3
months ago!" Tony takes my phone and puts an address into the
direction app. I look down at it confused, "This isn't the normal
place?" Tony answers, "I know dude, he is at his homies house
hanging out I think, and he told me to just meet him there." I nod
to Tony and start the car we speed off out of the neighborhood almost
hitting a neighbor's cat. "You barely missed pussy!" Tony mocks
me. I turn to him with a straight face "Hey that's not cool I
love cat's!" Tony laughs at the seriousness in my voice, "And
that's why you don't get ass Derek."
As
we pull up to the house I hand Tony the money. "Damn dude, 250?"
I roll my eyes at him and reply annoyed, "Yeah Tony, 250, you smoke
for free don't you?" Tony puts the money in his front pocket and
opens the door. "You don't have to be an asshole dude, I'm just
saying you are coming extra prepared for tonight!" I lean over and
grab the door to shut it, he looks back and says "You know you can
come in and get it yourself, you give the homie a couple hundred
every week, and he'd probably like to meet you." I shut the door
without an answer and turn my music up just a touch. I don't really
know why I don't get weed myself, I've always just had Tony get
it for me since the day I moved here. I sometimes say that I prefer
to not have to contact drug dealers directly but I know plenty of pot
dealers that are perfectly fine people. I just like the security of
knowing that my best friend I have out here can take a couple
hundreds of my dollars and consistently not rip me off or do anything
sketchy to me.
After
a few songs go by and I finish my second cigarette I look around to
see any signs of Tony being back. He usually takes a little bit, but
I'm wearing a jacket and its getting kind of hot and humid in the
car. I look over to the house and see the front door open, as I lean
over to unlock the passenger door I realize it's not Tony.
I've
never seen the guy before, he looks about the same age as I am, maybe
even a little older than me. He has a completely shaved head and a
tattoo that runs down his hairline. He pulls a joint out of his
fitted khaki pants and the lighter from his shirt pocket. Up to this
point I have not met another person who wears plain black t-shirts
with a pocket in the front that wasn't my grandpa or a cholo, it
intrigued me. I watch as he lights the large perfectly rolled doobie
and puffs on it for a few minutes. Finally Tony emerges from the door
behind him and says something to the guy. The guy gives tony a
piercing look that I could feel burning through his skull from my
seat in the car. Tony just quickly turns away from the guy and speed
walks back to my car. He hops in the passenger seat alarmed and tells
me to drive away quickly. I speed from in front of the house and turn
around the corner quickly. "What's wrong dude? What the hell
happened?" Tony looks back through the window quickly and then
turns towards me more calmly. "Well he only had 13 grams to sell
you so he gave it to you for 90." I look over at him and stick my
palm out, he digs into his pocket and gets out the 160 dollars and
then pulls out a zip-lock bag full of sticky purple buds. "So
that's why you were in a hurry to leave? Because he didn't have
enough weed for me, it's really not a big deal." Tony looks over
at me confused and then punches me in the arm. "No you idiot, you
didn't see the scary looking fucker out in front of the house?" I
pull into a parking lot in front of the convenience store and the
pawn shop and put the money in my wallet leaving the 10 on my
dashboard. "Yeah I saw him, looks like you pissed him off." Yeah
well that asshole grabbed a gram off the sack we were buying to roll
a joint and when I asked him for the 10 bucks, he just stared at me
like he was going to kill me." I look at the bag of pot and look
back up at Tony, "So you gave away a joint of my shit for free?"
Tony grabs the 10 from the dashboard and gets out of the car. "You
can go ask for it if you want! I'm sure he would be glad to give it
to you." I throw my shit in the glove box and shake my head, "I'm
not a drug dealer, and I enjoy sharing." Tony turns towards me and
throws a hand signal at me to call me a vagina, I am not offended
because I swear I smell the shit from his shorts still.
It's
night time finally and we are sitting in my car at the park with the
car hot boxed watching the rain fall onto my windshield. Tony tosses
a hot fry in my general direction and misses terribly. "Hey man,
you ready to hit this party?" I sit there and stare out the window
pretending I don't hear him. This time the hot fry ricochets off my
side window and explodes onto my lap. I quickly turn to him and
exclaim "you're going to vacuum my car if you don't stop that
shit pussy boy!" Tony throws a couple hot fries in his mouth and
laughs "Let's get moving then asshole." I sigh and start the
car pulling my hair back from my face and into a bandana I keep
hanging on my mirror. Tony looks over at me and says half-jokingly
"Go get a haircut man, you're never going to meet any cute girls
with all that hair going everywhere." I turn up the music and light
a cigarette as we pull from the parking lot.
There
are at least forty to fifty cars lining the roads approaching the
house. There are groups of teenagers some still in high school, some
the same age as us, and even some people that I remember being older
than us walking up to a large house with a gate separating the grand
driveway and the street. As I continue to the house Tony signals for
me to slow down, I come to a stop in front of the house and he makes
a phone call. After a quick exchange with who I'm assuming is the
homeowner tony gets off the phone and has me pull up to the garage.
"You want me to park my car in her garage?" I say hesitantly.
Tony looks at me as if I'm dumb and tells me to just pull into it.
I pull my car into the girl's garage and watch in my rearview
mirror as it shut behind me. This was inconvenient for me if I wanted
to leave early without letting Tony or anyone know, but who am I
kidding? I will probably be here all night anyways.
Before
we walk into the actual house we sit on the front of my car and begin
to roll up. I watch as Tony instantly climbs all over Aurora and I
introduce to myself to the other girl with her in the garage,
Jessica, she looks young and scared of all the commotion but seems
nice enough. We smoke a couple joints in the garage and get up to
head inside. As I walk from the garage through the pitch black
laundry room I start to hear the loud music of the party, it gets
louder and louder till I turn the corner and see the mass of people
all shoulder to shoulder drinking, smoking, and acting like they are
genuinely enjoying the company of one another. There are so many
people that it becomes stressful immediately. I look around for any
other person I might know and don't see anybody immediately. I know
I'm too high to function in normal society right now. Then I come
to the most real clear thought I have had all day. I liked the cold,
empty, silent room more than I like all these people right now.
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