A Very Sad Dream

Not alive and not dead
I walk through this life watching
Affecting others
Unimportant
But for lives I touch blotching
I can give joy
Pain
Love
Or hate
And much inspiration
But I do not partake
I feel all of these things
But none mine to take

I was gone years ago
When I forfeited being
Disregard for self
Others
And all
Has sentenced me
To painful nonbeing
I owe God
And the world
Everyone and all

I walk amongst the living
A phantom
No person
No me
Capable of everything
And nothing at all
I mean nothing
No value
Possess no esteem
I do not belong
I am nothing at all
Just a very sad dream