The Goodbye I Never Had

How do you say,

Those words you thought you'd never say.

With the tears,

All rolling down your face.

What can you do,

When all you can do is lose,

The hope.

The faith.

The dreams.

The sleep.

The hunger.

And ever so slowly..

The emotion and feelings,

For the 'Goodbye' you never had.

The friends I've gained,

With many enemies along the way.

Yet not once did I get to say,

Goodbye or Good Day.

I know it's too late,

And I know it's my fate.

To live a healthy happy life,

Among my fellow friends.

But it really feels,

Like I sincerely have none.

These words I say,

On the very worst day,

I feel like doing it..

On this very night.

Should I do it?

Should I touch the blade?

Should my life be taken,

With a proper and smooth,

Goodbye I never once got to have.