Hydrotherapy

When I got up one day with the cracking of dawn
on an October day in the midst of a yawn,
I beheld a Jacuzzi on my backyard deck
and with my double take I ‘bout whip-lashed my neck.

A Jacuzzi does not appear out of thin breeze
nor arrive on red wood planks from out of the trees.
On the atomic level, creation is known,
but Jacuzzi from nothing is mere Twilight Zone.

So I had to go inspect my hot tub extant
wondering if it was some Lowe’s/Home Depot plant.
If it had been set up in the still of the night,
it was AM efficient beneath lunar light.

And the high jets were running in beautiful spa
at the right water level with no more to draw.
Yet despite the allure, there indeed was a rub;
there were no plumbing hookups in this newfound tub!

I reached into the tub to the warm water surge
because knowing how this came about was an urge.
Then I call the Home Depot and then I called Lowe’s,
but the lingering mystery whetted my woes.

I made coffee for clarity then I came back
and there out by the fence was a man dressed in black.
His composure was cool and in fact spoke of gall;
it was clear he had something to do with it all.

I went up to the man who then flashed me a grin;
he then started his pitch before I could begin.
Like the jets in the spa, sales oration just flowed
and I felt like my patience was on overload.

Then the sweat on my brow became rivers indeed
when he ended with what I thought to be overt greed.
If I chose not to buy it, then that was okay,
but there would be a fee to take the tub away!

I said nothing at all as I wiped off my pate,
but just pointed with steadfastness at the back gate.
As he left, I called to my wife so joyfully:
“Honey, please bring my swim trunks, then come and join me!”


36 Lines (Anapestic Tetrameter)
Writer’s Cramp October 22, 2013