Mourning the Death of my Brother, Dave

My Brother, Dave, is the fifth of my mother's children and I am number four. There are five boys (now four) and two girls.

I cannot say that I understand why he shot himself or why the Lord allowed him to live to see the next day but am glad that the Lord gave him a second chance.

Dave, jovial, a teaser and fun loving is how I remember him. His sweet smile when he says "What's up Higgins?" as he looks in interest at me. I miss him so.

I cry because I love and miss my brother so much. I wondered why didnt he speak to his family and let us know what was happening. I cry so much. I came here today to let my heart speak but my eyes are just flowing with tears and I cant continue writing this piece.

All I ask is that you pray for us, the family, because not one of us are taking it very nicely although we behave as if we do in order not to let the others cry. I close my eyes and I see hm on that hospital bed and I cry. If I watch a movie and the man puts a gun to his head I cry. When I call my daughter's name, Davia, I cry. Dave always said that she was named after him. My daughter poor child is trying to cope but each time I call her name she weeps.

I felt so weak yesterday, I took all my energy to go to church and minister, being Youth Sunday and as the president I was in charge. I was physically, mentally but a little stronger spiritually. After ministering the Word of God, I felt so drained I had to rest for a while.

Out of all this, I plan to stay close and closer and yet closer to God and clsoer to my family.

Dave, I miss you so. May your soul find rest and peace in Christ and most of all I hope that the opportunity to repent was taken.

Dave gone too soon, sorely missed by family and will always be remembered. I miss you my little brother.