How to Achieve Your Foodgasm

How to Achieve Your Foodgasm
A guide to a higher realm of the culinary arts

All true foodies know of the foodgasm, if not by its name, then by its effects. Its symptoms can be spotted from across the room at the very best dining establishments. They include, but are not limited to, extreme giddiness, irrepressible sighs of contentment, and slapping your palm down on the table while attempting to describe the orchestra of flavors playing in your mouth. 

Though the etymology of the slang term, foodgasm, is inescapably apparent, its exact definition is a bit more elusive. Urban dictionary defines it as, "the euphoric sensation upon tasting amazingly delicious food." I would add to this definition one of my own. I believe that a foodgasm is a positive culinary experience so profound that it literally has the potential to change your life.

Many might scoff at the idea that food can be so influential, but I've seen skeptics turn into full fledged believers in just one bite. I remember the first time it happened to me. I was living with my family in Hong Kong when my father suggested that we try a molecular fusion restaurant called Bo Innovation. It had won two of the prestigious Micheline Stars, and had acquired rave reviews.

I sat at the ultra-modern kitchen bar with my sister and father, watching our 13 course tasting meal be prepared, listening to the light clink of fork and plate, and began tasting dishes unlike any I had tried before. Of the 13 courses, not a single flavor seemed out of place or even failed to surprise and delight. My favorite was a piece of marbled toro tuna, cut thin like carpaccio. On top of it were flecks of strawberry and foie gras that had been frozen with liquid nitrogen and shattered with a hammer. It was so delicate that we had to roll it up and eat it with tweezers. I was so overwhelmed by the flavor, that I had to set my tweezers down in-between bites, close my eyes, and focus the entirety of my attention on the fish that melted like butter on my tongue.

The effect the food had upon my family was as remarkable as the food itself. We talked and laughed and enjoyed each other's company more than we ever had before, and all the typical family tensions melted away in the presence of the shared experience.

As I said before, it can sometimes be life changing. My sister ended up working as a chef for Bo Innovation the following summer and my father now brings every visiting friend to the restaurant. As for me, well, I don't think I'll forget the taste of that toro dish until the day I die.

But how can you achieve a proper foodgasm? Well unfortunately, it's dependent on more than just food. The people you're with, the staff, the atmosphere, all of those factors must be in perfect harmony with the dishes served, and in order for that to happen, a certain amount of luck is required.

Still, you can increase your chances. Here's my how-to tips:

1. Be prepared to spend some money: I know, sometimes the prices of these places are exorbitantly expensive, but you have to think of it in a different way. A good gourmet experience is not just some ordinary meal, it's a performance. Think of it like a concert. You'd pay a good sum to listen to a favorite band of yours play for a few hours, and I assure you that a gourmet meal can be equally enjoyable and rewarding if you do it right.

2. Research well before choosing your restaurant: There are few things more disappointing than shelling out some serious cash for a mediocre meal. I found my first foodgasmic restaurant in San Antonio by reading reviews on the internet. A reviewer said that a small Mexican-French fusion restaurant called Ernesto's deserved a Micheline Star. I went and it was fantastic. Easily one of the best meals I've had in the United States so far.

3. Take your time: This isn't take-out at your local Whataburger, do not scarf. It may seem like common sense, but sometimes the food is so delicious that you have to combat your impulse to wolf it down. A good practice is to set your utensils aside in-between bites.

4. Take a gourmet virgin or virgins with you: Possibly the only thing better than experiencing a foodgasm yourself, is watching others experience it for the first time and knowing that you gave them that experience.

5. Eat light beforehand: As my father always says, "hunger is the best sauce".

6. Wine pairings: If you can afford it, pair the food with some good wine. The wine not only helps augment the flavors of the food, but also helps suppress that little critic everyone has lurking in their heads. Don't get a cocktail though. The stronger alcohol befuddles the flavors and your ability to appreciate them.

7. Talk about the food: Share your excitement, try to figure out why it's so good and what kind of flavors are assailing your tongue. Just for that night, don't worry about sounding pretentious or snobby. It's your fancy meal, talk fancy and enjoy it.

8. Be tolerant of strange foods: You might get some unusual dishes from time to time, but at least try all of them. Sometimes, you'll fall in love with something you never thought you'd eat before. 

For those established foodies out there, I’m sure you already know the impact a foodgasm can have. For those of you who haven’t yet had a foodgasm, I encourage you to seek one out. Save up your pocket money for a while, do your research, and enter into the wonderful world of gourmet food with an open mind and empty stomach.