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Rated: · Short Story · Experience · #1853428
Ever been fed up with modern appliances and their annoying helpful noises? Read this!






The Curse Of Modern Day Appliances


Life today seems so easy, we have every convenience, every appliance on hand to help make out lives 'easier'? Don't we? Well in one sense yes, we are more technically savvy and we can now do things we never imagined 20yrs ago but the reality is the opposite.

Take for example the fact that once upon a time our everyday appliances such as refrigerators, washing machines, televisions, dryers etc. were built and guaranteed to last for at least 10yrs. Now there are one or two companies producing these appliances and you are lucky to get 1yr warranty, unless you want to pay extra! Why? Well suddenly we have become the ultimate ' disposable society, with in built obsolescence'. No more quality or dependable product names, no more confidence that the appliance will give you a good life span. Just junk!, which one or two countries supply under a variety of names which nearly always breakdown just after the warranty expires ( by pure coincidence, of course?).

Many might say, 'that's fine, replace the appliance, after all it's not that expensive to replace. However, what happens to the fridges, TV’s, washers, microwaves, mobile phones and even cars that we continually replace? Well, they end up being thrown out, where- sometimes to recycling, however more than not just dumped and the landfill further adds to the 'crisis' our planet is facing. We have been told of Global Warming and the great need to recycle but many of the parts or components in these appliances will never disintegrate or compost into useful materials.

Well you can now tell how these modern appliances are a curse in one way but while I'm at it- am I the only person in the world who finds it totally annoying that today just about every appliance we use has to come with a whiny, loud, non stop ' BEEP, BEEP, BEEP, BEEP', to signal to the dumb owner that something is up!! Yeah, we certainly are stupid and need an annoying sound to tell us this!

For me this is a relatively, new phenomenon, where I notice that everything from a washing machine, refrigerator, dryer, television, mobile phones and cars all have these annoying noises to alert 'stupid' us of something we already know! It has got to such a stage of annoyance that I just can't stand it any more! I say ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!!

So how do I cope with this frustration you ask? I take the ultimate step of rebellion- I answer back to the ' BEEP, BEEP, BEEPS', that drive me absolutely insane! Yes, that's right, I talk to inanimate objects, why? Because in the end it makes me feel better, releasing my frustrations and being able to feel human and in control again.

Crazy as it seems there are just so many examples of this- take for example the fact that a few months ago our faithful refrigerator died. Sad I know it had been a loyal companion. However, reality meant we had to purchase a new one. Now there are many brands and features to choose from, but basically I just wanted a regular working refrigerator, not anything too gadget y. So we bought one which was a reasonable price, with a 2yr warranty and brought it home. Now call me old fashioned but the one thing I never expected was for it to drive me crazy with the loud BEEPS that emanate from it every time the door is left open for around 1-2 minutes, when presumably the temperature drops a little. I mean we all know that its probably trying to save energy but really does it have to be so 'darn persistent'???? Every day , day in, and day out, every dinner time while I am trying to gather the ingredients for our dinner, the darn thing ' BEEPS...BEEPS...BEEPS...BEEPS' , not once, twice or three times- just continuously!! Honestly, enough is enough, producing a family meal is stressful enough, let alone being ordered by your fridge to close the door all the time!

So what do I do now? Well, I rant and rave back at the BEEP. Yes, I say things like “ O.K, I hear you”, “ Yes I know the temperature is dropping but I am busy, can't you see that, you stupid appliance!! Another favourite is “ Can't you just stop for one second while I organise things”. But it never stops, so now I must also admit to my shame that at times I am driven to the occasional swear word if pushed too far by this inanimate object who seems to rule my life in the kitchen!

The same can be said for my laptop. Sure it allows me to communicate, learn and explore the world but what about the strange 'BEEP' sounds it makes when something goes wrong( which it frequently does, whether it is a programme error or trouble with the internet!). For something that is meant to help most days I find it nothing but ultimately frustrating as it can take hours to complete what should be a simple task, whether emailing, surfing the net or conducting business, there is always some problem that just as you are about to finish, you hear a loud “BEEP....BEEP...BEEP” immediately indicating you are about to lose all your hard work, or internet connection and have to start from scratch. Great, another 4 hours down the drain! That's not so annoying is it? Just because the internet cannot handle the volume of traffic and drops out at the worst possible time, the crucial moment-not at all! And then the laptop has the cheek to keep 'BEEP, BEEP, BEEPING at me as if I cannot tell that something is wrong because my screen has disappeared!

So I suppose you can guess what follows these laptop moments- yep, long drawn out one way conversations with my inanimate laptop. The monologue goes something like this- “What the......is wrong now!”; “Stop making that god awful BEEP at me and tell me how to fix the problem!!”; “ Look, I've rebooted you six times already and reconnected to the internet five , what else could you possibly want from me???? I am REALLY..... REALLY ABOUT TO LOSE IT IF YOU DON'T CO-OPERATE SOON! Are you listening to me?”; “ Can't you just do what I want, after all you are supposed to be state of the art?”. Guess not- no reply from the laptop, so finally I give up, having wasted more time than if I had researched using a book or written a letter. Now all I have is the worlds worst headache and a slight feeling of insanity!

Of course I could go on about how the phone BEEPS every time the phone company sends me an offer I don't want or the fact that the latest dryer BEEPS when you have used it too long and it is telling you to save power, as if you weren't trying to anyway. Even the fact that our new car constantly BEEPS if a door is ajar, the window slightly down or the air conditioner going too long!!! Yes, every single day of my life is filled with the unending sound of BEEPING coming from inanimate objects that have now driven me so mad, that I have humanised them and actually think that I can reason with them!





Reflecting on my conversations, some would say obviously she is out of her mind and at times I'd agree. However, I would say that in some small way I am gaining a little slice of control and calm back in my life, as more and more of these ' modern conveniences take over our world. So I chose to fight back and say no, you do not control my actions with the BEEPS!! I control my world and even though it may seem strange or odd to many out there, for me I find calm in the knowledge I have not given in. Why don't you join me in the good fight? Start answering back to your annoying conveniences and take back your life.




THE END OR NOT?


1363 words
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