Cosmetic Surgery

Cosmetic surgery - right or wrong?

The subject came up at the pub tonight: is plastic surgery a good thing, or is it something which exerts a unfair pressure on women to conform to unrealistic ideals of physical beauty?

We quickly established that the roots of cosmetic surgery had a beneficial purpose: repairing inborn imperfections such as 'hare-lips' and strawberry birthmarks, and also treating injuries such as burns and disfiguring tumours. No-one could argue against the benefits of such procedures.

But the use of cosmetic surgery for non-remedial purposes, such as breast enhancement, seems to be a less clearly defined moral issue. We agreed that sex industry workers who want to augment their assets for financial reasons have every right to do so, as long as they're willing to accept the possible side-effects. But what about the woman who bought breast implants for her 15yr-old daughter? That has to be wrong!

My position is that age shall not wither, nor custom stale her infinite variety. In other words, I don't see why breasts should be geometrically perfect cones or hemispheres. I told my friends in the pub: "Maybe I'm some kinda horrendous pervert," - not one voice was raised in objection - "but I like breasts that are human-breast-shaped."

However, having said that, there is one cosmetic surgery procedure that I'm entirely in favour of: vaginoplasty.

Picture the scene: you've met a really nice girl. She has perfect curves, skin like alabaster, hair like spun gold, eyes like azure pools, and a pussy like a butcher's dustbin. There you are, you've gone to all the trouble and expense of wining and dining her, you've been careful to say all the right things, you've even pretended to be interested in her opinions etc - then just as you're about to enter the home straight you're confronted with something that looks like it just crawled out of a Dalek.
If only she'd bothered to have the operation to tidy up her growler!
Honestly, sometimes it's not easy being a bloke.