I Never Made it to Hawaii

    When someone asks me what I might like to do with my life, I usually find myself looking up, over, swaying a bit on my feet, squinting, giving a shrug and finally sighing and telling them that I have no discernible answer. After a brief moment of pity, he or she will almost always offer some sort of  inspiration:

    "What about sitting down to write out your personal 'seven wonders', or just scribble out your future successes in detail? It'll feel good to get it down and will give you something to aspire towards!" I then look up, over, sway a bit, squint, shrug and admit that I have no inclination to do so.

    To me, the idea of mapping out future milestones has always seemed like a chore, like fertilizing your mother's rhododendrons, or waxing linoleum. In fact, in my opinion it's even worse because the results are far less certain. A future that I have painstakingly procured in my mind's eye could end up a flop in reality, but a floor all agleam is a floor all agleam.

      Case in point, at the age of fifteen my goal in life was to move to Hawaii to make music for a popular software company. In school I would have regular daydreams where I, the big shot, sat stretched out on the sands of Waikiki celebrating the completion of my latest electronic opus. The sun would always be shining in this fool's paradise, just like in the pictures on my future employer's website (the ones I would stare at longingly when I returned home in the afternoon). Here I was a suave bachelor by night, and a virtuoso by day. Oh things would be different!

      Well, a little more than a decade has gone by since that particular dream came about, and a little more than 9 years have gone by since that dream fizzled out. And now I've come to learn that a few years ago, the particular branch of that company that I had obsessed over closed down. And don't quote me on this, but I think the entire company has since gone under. Anyway, you get where I'm coming from.

      Thing is though, to this day I'm still a musician, and that will never change. It stands to reason, then, that true passions never change. Where they have the potential to lead you, however, is eternally in transit.