Short Story: Is your mummy or daddy home

Short story: is your mummy or daddy home?

So, there I was enjoying a nice relaxing day at home after a very busy schedule the day before, when a knock sounded at my door. Sigh, another sales person no doubt, I thought. I pulled open my door and there stood a middle aged lady donned with a clipboard and name badge. Bingo! I thought. What will it be today? Gas? Electric? Maybe even make-up?

'Hey' I said, with a somewhat forced smile.
'Hello, is your mummy or daddy home?' The lady said, genuinely.

As I stood there in the doorway of a home I had owned for nearly 3 years, knowing that I was waiting to hear about a 2nd interview for a job that I was seriously over qualified for, I resisted the urge to laugh.

'Errr, no, my mother lives 20 miles away and my father lives in whole other country. Can I help you?'

The lady looked very perplexed and somewhat flustered. I could not decide whether she had realised that she had made a mistake in her judgement of me from my appearance, or whether she was confused as to why I was parent-less in my "condition".

'No, that's okay dear, I am just looking to talk to bill payers today'

I smiled.

'Well, sadly that's me then' I said, 'mind you, I wish it wasn't - household bills cost a bomb'. I tried hard to settle her with my usual poor attempts at being funny. However, it was clearly lost in translation...

'Yes, well I do not think what I have to offer is necessary for you today… umm, bye Sweetie!' And with that she scuttled off to the next house, no doubt relieved to find no one home since since I was still looking out the door in bemusement.  She was right, I probably didn’t have any need for whatever it was she was sell, but I felt that since she had disturbed me peace, I should at least have had even just a snippet of her sales pitch!
I went inside, closing the door behind me, had a mini chuckle to myself, brushed myself down and carried on my day as if nothing had happened!


Disclaimer: I have Cerebral Palsy so I am obviously disabled [opposed to being able to hide my impairment] with a speech impairment. I find these kinds of [true] stories amusing, if you do not - I apologise!