first novel, constructive critisim very welcome, beginning of first draft, notclose todone |
The Prodigies 5 years ago... As she lay awake, minutes from sleep, she couldn’t shake the feeling that something was changing... she was changing. Mia, now twenty had spent the last three years becoming someone new. Her memory from before had become something of the past, foggy and unclear. Not that she was complaining, she was completely captivated with her new life. For the first time in years she felt that she had a purpose. Although she had to cut all ties from her family and friends, she finally felt like she belonged to something bigger then herself. Born in Marbleton, Wyoming Mia had lived a small town life. Her family owned Local Diner, one of the three restaurants Marbleton offered their nine hundred forty nine residents. Living in a town where everyone knew each other had felt constricting. Life in Marbleton was too predictable. Mia knew when Mrs. Hutchings would be watering her plants. She knew when the smell of fresh apple cobbler would be wafting down the streets from Mrs. White’s house, and that at anytime past 3:00 pm she could find Mr. Erv the town drunk at the bar. But the minute she left, she let go of her past, determined to live a life unpredictable. After the injection her body was completely different. She was one of one hundred subjects with IQ’s nearing perfect, strength trumping the strongest body builder and reflexes 80 times faster than the average human. But tonight it felt wrong... she felt wrong. The euphoria that had once filled her entire body had fizzed and she was left feeling anxious and angry and unsure of what was coming next. In the seconds before sleep took over, Mia held on as tight as she could to the last ounce of happiness left in her. Hoping for the first time that if she held tight enough tomorrow would be an average predictable day. Chapter 1 I couldn't tell you what it was that woke me up, it wasn't the stench of cleaning supplies,and it wasnt the steady beeping that at the time i could of sworn I would be hearing for the rest of my life. i think the best way to describe it is simply a new feeling. before i even opened my eyes i felt more sure of myself then i ever had, and thats saying something since i had no idea where i was. i could hear the shuffling of feet around me, and the hushed whispers "we shouldn't of done this again!" Done what? i thought, and where am i? usually by now i would have flown up out of bed and demanded answers, but i was thinking differenty now. |