Angry barista fantasizes about customer. |
Home. Then work. Then me. Waiting with a minty white sparkling smile perky permenant and icily frozen, blended with coffee talk and vivacious flirtaciousness as I wend those last few pennies from sweating palms into the tip jar selling caffeinated culture, lattes, and my soul on the side. I am a roadside vendor of "class". Ha. I sell hot milk in cardboard cups to men bulging with Vitamin D and Gold's Gym fortified muscles and too-tight outdoor adventure wear wicking their hurried from the double parked car sweat. Wick this. Whatever happened to whisky shots, and flannel? By the Way. Don't bring your tall cool iced nonfat white chocolate girlfriend in here. This is my territory, bitch. Dirty little secret: you're not always drinking that nonfat milk you think you are. What's the point, you're gonna puke it up anyway, spewing regurgitated lies past your raspberry lips honey macchiato hair dripping in the bowl, as you retch and purge trash into the vanilla white porcelain pee-hoe. When he kisses you, can he taste the vomit? The lettuce and espresso that was your lunchtime binge, caught in your denture-straight sparkling stainless steel teeth? I didn't think so. Hazelnut whore. I'm onto you. |