Learning to Soar Above the Storms

  Jodi Marie Davis’ grip on the steering wheel of the white cab over Freightliner she had been driving was of such force that her knuckles were white. The shaking through her body threatened to dislocate her from reality. What made her think she could successfully drive one of these big rigs? Here she was 1200 miles from home and a miserable failure. After having knocked over a fence, and running numerous four wheelers off the road, she had wrapped the truck and reefer around the fuel pumps of a convenience store at four that very morning. She was in no condition to continue this trip, her thoughts were just too incoherent and there was still one load to deliver. She couldn’t find the courage to pull out of the parking space of the truck stop where she had taken refuge just at the outskirts of Milwaukee, Wisconsin and it was only 8 am.
  “God, did I hear you wrong? I was so sure I was following your leading. How did my life fall into a shamble, so quickly? God, did I misunderstand your leading?” Jodi prayed.
  “Where is your faith?” whispers the Holy Spirit.
  “I feel that it has been stomped, ground to nothing.” Crushed by the heavy emotional load that she had been driving under for over a week, she could not think coherently. “Where are you now, God?  Have you forsaken me?” asked Jodi. Jodi sees a vision of a faith seedling being stomped by a large brogan boot. “There is my faith, Lord. It has been crushed!”
  “How would you handle this seedling if it were in your garden?” whispers the Holy Spirit as in a vision, Jodi sees hands gently lift the seedling and pack the dirt around it.
  “I would gently restore it upright and then nurture it until it took root again. I would shield it from further damage by placing a hedge of protection around it.” she replied. “But how does she do that now?” was the thought that flashed through her mind. “Did she have the strength to continue with the delivery scheduled for that morning?”
  Softly the Holy Spirit continues, “ Lo, I am with you always, even unto the end of the world.” Matt: 28:20.
  As the Holy Spirit speaks, he reminds Jodi of the first time the Lord had spoken these words to her. It was the night of July 5, 1967, only eight months after her mother had been called home; it would have been her thirty-fifth birthday. Jodi had asked her papa for flowers to place upon her grave in remembrance. But there was no money for flowers, not enough money to spare. She was sixteen, though a woman in so many ways, still very much a child within her spirit. Jodi lay across the bed with her face buried in her pillow, framed by her crossed arms, crying with such anguish the bed shook. As she continued to pray, asking Jesus to please help her mother understand why there were no flowers upon her grave and would he please be sure she knew how much she was still loved and how greatly she was missed.
  Jodi continued to pray and cry out in anguish for hours in the darkness of her room. Her heart was broken, her spirit shattered, the child in her wanted to know “Why Not!” It was very important to her, but her Papa did not seem to notice.
  As Jodi cried out to Jesus, suddenly the sound of many harps filled her room. The most beautiful sounds she had ever heard. As she lifted her head in response to the sounds, a glow liken to the noonday sun shone through her window. Within the bright effervescent light the image of a translucent being began to take form. His garment was a robe the purest, brightest white she had ever seen. With long flowing white hair, the being’s features were obscured by the glory that shone about him. He stood with arms outstretched while hovering about three feet above the floor. Jodi became aware of two cherubs that knelt at the feet of this being as her spirit received the words,  “Lo, I will be with you always, even unto the end of the world”. Just as quickly, the room was dark again, but his peace he left with her. It would be years before Jodi would realize it was the
Spirit of God that had visited her in the darkness of her anguish. The memory would always reassure her that she was God’s child, and a perfect Father would never leave his child in her anguish.