Thoughts On An Autumn Afternoon

When he said he would be there for me I am certain that he meant it.  I would not call him "liar" and yet, and yet - where is he?  Am I to believe that God chastises me for errors of commission or of omission?  If he is not mine then why can I not release him?  Because every time I think that I have stepped forward - stepped away - someone asks about him or my heart remembers what my ears have heard and it all begins again.  I must hold steadfast to what I believe is the truth.  He said we are in a relationship - perhaps I don't understand what he meant by that.  He asks me why he has not heard from me and then does not respond to my answer.

He demanded that this book be written.  It is written.  Why, then, has he departed?  He has chosen the publisher but the manuscript languishes - awaiting his editing skills. 

It is hard.  It is hard.  And now the weather turns and, again, I have no one to share it with.  I do not understand.  But I go on - believing that where there is life there is hope.