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Rated: E · Monologue · Comedy · #1626216
Christmas Pains...(sigh)
It's the same every year. When Christmas comes around, we always think something like: Yes!, Finally!, or some other nonsense. Then we think about what follows, and our countenance usually drops like an anvil in the sky. Think about it: Having to buy gifts for so many people, not knowing if someone else will buy someone the same thing that you are, having to put up all of those dang Christmas decorations...it can get to someone after a few years. Right?

Anyway, we still try to find some holiday cheer in all of that. Even if it is just like trying to find a needle in a haystack.

If you're still thinking about what I just said, drop it. You have worse things to think about. Like the number of gifts to buy(hint, hint). No...darn, thought that would merit a complaint. Well anyway, the average person may need to buy at least twenty to thirty Christmas gifts per year...if not more. This can certainly get to someone after some time. No?! So that's how it's gonna be...huh? Alright then, here's round two.

What if someone else buys the same thing that you are for the same person? Or worse than that: ...what if they already have it...That has to be a real bit of terror comin' at ya...huh?

...Well?...that's it! You force me to bring out the mother of all holiday pains. If this doesn't get you, then you have a cerebellum of pure steel...

Decorations! All those endless hours of trying to string up the right number of lights, having to go out and get a Christmas tree, real or not, and then stringing up all of the lights on it, hanging all of the ornaments, should I keep going? No...Alright, I see that you're one of those people then. Fine...If that didn't get to you, then you win...

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