Of Two Minds - Chapter 2

"Hello?" She answered on the second ring. Though her voice held a question mark, it was full of friendliness.

"Hey, Mom."

"Yes?"

"Could I stay after school today? I want to join the soccer team. Well, I guess I should ask you first, huh?" There was a pause. Barbara Owens could hear the sounds of students shouting and running in the background. All headed out the doors like a running herd of cattle, anxious to board the bus and head off to their various points of destination. "So, can I?" He asked, his voice coming through clearer than the background noise.

"Well, I don't know." She said, frowning a little.

"Ah, come on Mom. I can play sports and keep my grades up as well." He almost had a hint of whine in his voice.

"Well . . . okay, but if your grades start slipping I'm yanking you. Do you understand?"

"Yeah, yeah, got it. Thanks Mom! I won't let you down, I promise."

"Okay." She smiled, though she knew he could not see her. He was so eager to please.

"Okay, so the meeting is today for us to sign up. The announcement said it would only be for about 30 minutes and then we start conditioning next week."

"Alright, that's fine. So, what time do I need to pick you up?"

"Uh, I don't know, 3:30."

"Okay, don't keep me waiting."

"Okay, thanks mom! Gotta go!"

"I love you Kevin," she said quickly before he could hang up.

"Uh, okay."

"Are you with your friends? You're ashamed to tell you mother that you love her?"

He let out a little sigh. "No."

"Well say it then."

"Okay. I love you too, Mom."

"Thank you. I know that wasn't difficult. Now, run along and have fun. I'll see you at 3:30. Be outside waiting for me, okay?"

"Okay, Mom."

"Bye, bye."

"Bye."

She listened to him replace the receiver and gave a little thoughtful smile. Her son was finally going to take on more responsibility. It wasn't that he was lazy, because he certainly wasn't. Kevin took out the trash, set and cleared the table, kept his room clean, and completed all his homework without being told to. He was the model child, the model student. He would probably do very well at Yale or Harvard or someplace equally prestigious, after coming out of high school of course. Though he maintained straight A's, he was not quite genius material. Now he was going to get into sports, wonderful. Not only would he be the model son and student, but his red brown hair, green eyes, and boyish good looks would be paired with a body that matched. Right now he was a bit too thin. He was almost a miniature of his father. The only things he had from his mother were hair and eye color, and currently her height.

Barbara Owens was a proud woman. She was a happy housewife, and mother. She was going on her 23rd year of marriage and her 15th year of being a mother. She spent her hours cooking, cleaning, gardening, sewing, writing poetry, and researching how to become a better wife, partner, and lover. Her husband -Anthony Owens- was her ideal man. He was three years her senior, handsome, and everything she believed she wanted in a man. He was 6'2", and towered over her by more than six inches, well built, had brown chocolate pools for eyes, that dared you to drop your pants and scream "take me!", and a rather charming quiet personality. He provided for his family as a housepainter and remodeler. It wasn't the best paying job but he was very good at it and had plenty of work to keep him busy.

She had about 45 minutes before she was due to pick up her beloved offspring. Surely he had given himself some extra time to pal around with his friends. She decided she would bake a cake with the spare time. A chocolate cake with vanilla icing would be perfect after dinner. She hummed a little to herself while she gathered the necessary ingredients from the pantry and fridge.

* * *

Kevin sat attentively which the coach started in on a speech about commitment, hard work, and the importance of being an active member on a team. He spent fifteen minutes lecturing them with a voice that was full of conviction, passion, and motivation. It was almost as if he were trying to sell a product that would benefit every single woman, man, and child in the whole world. Kevin admired his speaking ability and mentally wrote down pointers in his mind. At 14-years-old he wasn't given many public speaking opportunities in the classroom. But he was determined that in the future he would use what he noted. He would use hand gestures, keep his chest out, pace around, keep his head up, and speak with a voice filled with passion.

Maybe in another life the teacher had been a great speaker. Or maybe he just simply wanted a highly motivated team that would get out there and win. It turned out that the soccer team had only won a few games the past couple of years. Maybe a highly motivated team would bring the school some pride and respect. And maybe Mr. Brooks would no longer be jeered by the coaches at the other schools. Just maybe. So he was upping it a bit. He was sure that if he gave the students lots of encouragement and praise for their efforts than his wishes would be fulfilled.

While winning wasn't everything, it did have the ability to give one a sense of accomplishment. What he really enjoyed though, were the children. He loved to see them happy and excited and working hard and having fun. Maybe it was because he couldn't have any of his own. He and his wife -Susan- had tried to have a baby for more than three years. They were both in their prime. He was 35 and she was 36. He was an editor for the New York Times and she was an aspiring novelist.

After the first year with no luck they cracked down and became more serious. Susan eventually took a trip to a gynecologist, who assured them that her uterus and sexual organs were very healthy and that she should have no problem carrying a baby. She ovulated normally and everything was right as rain. She should be pregnant in no time.

So in the second year they tried exotic positions. They learned the whole Karma Sutra in hopes that some funky leg twisting, back bending, strength testing position would give them the little boy or girl that they desired. That failed too. Though she was told her body was healthy she chalked it up to stress. Her book idea wasn't going well and income was slowing down a little bit. Steven assured her that it would be okay and that maybe they should just take a break, and try it casually; as if not being dead set would increase their chances of becoming pregnant. In the middle of the third year Susan breeched the subject that maybe Steven should go to the doctor.

He was utterly baffled by the idea as well as deeply offended. How could she possibly suggest that something might be wrong with him? His manhood, man parts were absolutely fine! Arousal, firm, long-lasing erections, and ejaculation had never been a problem for him. How could something be wrong? Everything functioned properly. He brooded over it for a long time and eventually spoke to his brother and then his father. Neither knew what the problem was and both said it probably wasn't a big deal and would pass. Susan pleaded that he go to the doctor, just for some basic tests, just to put their minds at ease. She insisted that there was no shame in going. She had gone. Finally he went. He knew it was fear that had held him back. Fear that something was terribly wrong.

The proctologist/urologist listened to Steven expound on his performance abilities and gave him a warm comforting smile. Steven was like so many of the other men that she had seen. They all feared the unknown. She told him that she would take a sperm count and analysis and gave him a little plastic container and instructed him to go to a nice little, comfortable, private lounge equipped with a flat screen television, a DVD player, and a load of movies and magazines full of raunchy material that could probably help any sexually healthy man get off. All he wanted was Susan. He called her up and said, "Talk dirty to me." He did the deed, left the container where he was instructed to do so and was bid a good afternoon. He felt pretty confident, though there was a nagging at the back of his mind. Though he tried to disguise it, he was worried.

A week later he was given a call. Susan accompanied him to give him support. The doctor called them into her office and had them sit. She started off by saying that Steven's sperm count was good. Before he could breathe a sigh of relief she said "however". However what? How could there be a however? He tensed up in his chair, and waited. She said, “Your sperm count is good, however Mr. Brooks, your sperm appear to be dead.” Delight had never turned into despair so quickly. She explained that the majority of his sperm were non-motile and that he seemed to be suffering from immunologic infertility, in which his body had created antibodies towards his own sperm. “While your sperm production is pretty good the quality is very poor. The majority are shaped abnormally and are non-motile or aren’t moving at all. There are several reasons why this happens and some of the causes are unknown.”

She then asked a series of questions about past and recent injuries and told him that corticosteroids might possibly help though there would be serious side effects in the long run. She herself was very disappointed that she had to give him such news. She then spoke about the possibility of In Vitro. During that time that she talked she watched Steven’s face go through a series of changes. It went from delight to disbelief to stone and finally she watched it shatter and melt, surrendering to overwhelming emotion. He turned to Susan who was equally distraught and cried. Cried for him, cried for her, but mostly cried for the child of their own that they would probably never have.

That is why he so wanted to see the children be happy and succeed. They attempted In Vitro once but then decided to give up. They didn’t have the means to keep attempting when it was pretty certain that it would prove to be in vain. So they decided to fill the need the best way they could by getting involved with other people’s children and getting pets. Though animals would never replace a child, they were creatures in which their love could be poured. They had a Pomeranian and a Golden Retriever.

While Steven talked he didn’t think about any of this. He didn’t think about his infertility or the money that had been spent, or the unhappiness that had been shared. Instead he thought about motivating and the potential of having a good upcoming year. When he finished speaking the class applauded him and he could tell it wasn’t mockery. He then had everyone who desired to join to give their personal information so they could be contacted and a record could be kept. The meeting was adjourned and everyone headed out to carry on whatever activities they had planned and intended to do.

* * *

Barbara finished swirling the sweet white icing on the top of the cake and placed it on a glass pedestal and put the glass lid over it. Now all she needed was some ice cream. She would get it after she picked Kevin up from school. She checked the time. 3:15. It would take ten minutes to get there and five minutes of waiting wasn’t bad. She double-checked to make sure the oven was off, grabbed her keys and headed out the door. She settled in the driver’s seat of the 2000 Nissan Altima, fastened her seatbelt, started the engine, and pulled out the drive after switching the radio on.

She was a good woman, she truly was. She was extremely family-oriented and she always extended herself to help the neighbors and those in need. She was always the first to meet someone if they moved into the area, the first to participate in food drives, clothing drives, donations and countless children’s fundraisers. She wasn’t swimming in money -no- but she always found a way to pinch off a little from her meager stash to help others out.

She sang along to Green Day’s “Boulevard of Broken Dreams” and took the same course that she took ten times a week to Kevin’s school. She had insisted upon driving him to school. “It’s safer this way,” she said. She actually enjoyed the trips. She felt it was just another way that she could support her son. Though she probably seemed over-protective, she wasn’t. She allowed him the space and freedom that she felt was enough for a young teenage boy and she kept a close eye on the company that he kept. These days it was so easy for anyone to be caught up with the wrong group; teens and adults alike.

She mused over what she would make for dinner, which she approached the four-way intersection. The light changed to green right as she was beginning to apply pressure to the breaks. Hmm, must be her lucky day. So far all the lights had been in her favor. She was breezing along the route. Not that she minded stopping for stop lights. Other people should be able to breeze along their journeys every now and then too, right? Apparently she wasn’t the only one who had that mindset, because as she entered the intersection a big Ford F-150 breezed right through the red light. Her head snapped to the left as she heard squealing tires and her whole life’s best memories flashed through her mind in a fraction of a second; her graduation day, her childhood, her wedding, the first time she made love, when she found out she was pregnant, the birth of her soon, how right everything was five minutes before now.

Before she could respond the Ford slammed into her side. The door that had seemed rather sturdy just less than ten minutes before instantly caved in from the violent pressure. Fiberglass, metal, and plastic came flying into her body, her face. The car that had been following too closely behind crashed into her rear and snapped her forward the moment the airbag deployed, bouncing her head backward into a piece of bent metal that had been her car door. The shock of the sudden situation didn’t override the excruciating pain that she felt in her body. She made tiny little gasping sounds and tried to reach up and feel whatever item was lodged into the back of her skull. The car skidded across the intersection and came to a crunched stop, jerking her forward, freeing her from the object. A hot thickness oozed from her scalp down the back of her neck. She was going to die. There was no doubt about it. “Kevin,” she mouthed. “Kevin, I’m sorry.” She slumped forward, her head landing on the dashboard, her body twisted, but held in place by the seatbelt. Pearl Jam’s “Last Kiss” died on the radio.

The paramedics arrived ten minutes after the crash, along with the fire department, and police. The driver of the truck still remained behind the wheel, seemingly in a daze. Their airbag had deployed as well. An officer stepped up to their window. “Sir, you care to tell me what happened?” The officer asked, directing her question at the side of the man’s face. He looked to be in his late teens, early twenties. His clenched jaw and straight stare softened and he turned to look at her.

“Is she, she isn’t dead, is she?” He questioned, his face twisted with worry.

“We don’t know that yet. You care to tell me what happened?” She asked again.

* * *

Kevin stretched out on a bench outside on the school property. He would sit here so that he would be easily spotted by his mom when she arrived. He reviewed the mental points that he had written down and listened to his friend rave about the new chick in his class that had breasts the size of grapefruits though she was only 14-years-old. Kevin wasn’t particularly interested in that aspect of girls. In fact, at the moment he wasn’t very interested in girls at all; not that he was leaning the other way or anything. His mind was primarily centered on his work and what he was going to do in the future. He had not yet determined what he wanted his occupation to be. His friend continued on in explicit detail about what he wanted to do with that girl. Kevin barely listened, wishing his mom would hurry up and get here. It wasn’t like her to run late.

Matt’s ride showed up first. “Hey, dude, you need a ride? I’m sure my mom can drop you home.”

“No, that’s alright. I don’t want to leave and then she shows up and gets worried and mad and stuff. Thanks anyway though.”

“Yeah, okay. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Alright, bye dude.”

“Seeya!” Matt jumped in the car and rode off. Kevin stretched out again and checked his watch. She was ten minutes late. Maybe she had forgotten what time he had said. Oh well, he would give her a few more minutes and then would run in to the office to give her a call.

* * *

Paramedics rushed to Barbara’s car. The passenger door was locked so they broke the window and reached in. one look was enough to know that she was dead. Her eyes were open but they weren’t seeing anything. The man unfastened her seatbelt and pulled her out. Blood dripped from the back of her head and some had hardened on the left side of her face. Her body was limp, lifeless. She was handed over to another and placed on a stretcher. Thought it was pretty obvious, they checked for a pulse anyway. There was a sudden ringing coming from the body. The man that had laid her down fished into her right pocket and retrieved her cell phone. The caller ID said “Lakeland”. He answered it.

“Hello?”

Kevin frowned. Why was a man answering his mother’s phone? He didn’t respond.

“Hello?” The man said again.

“Hi,” Kevin replied, his voice holding suspicion.

The man’s heart suddenly weighed very heavily upon him. This woman wasn’t just an everyday scene. She was a mother, well, had been a mother. She had a child. He looked at her left hand. She had a husband. She probably meant the world to someone, and now she was gone.

“Um, is my mom there, can I talk to her?” He didn’t bother to ask who the man was. He could question his mom when he saw her. What reason would she have to hide the truth from him?”

“What’s your name son?”

Kevin really questioned this. A man was with his mom, keeping her from getting to him and he wasn’t even aware of what her son’s name was? “I’m Kevin. You know, her son.”

“Ah, listen Kevin”, the man said, rubbing his eyes. “Where are you?”

“I’m at school, why?”

“Were you waiting on your mom to come get you?” He ignored the question.

“Yeah. Why? What’s going on?” He sounded skeptical. “What’s the hold-up? She should have been by now.”

“Kevin, is there someone that might be able to come get you instead?”

“My dad, maybe. You know, her HUSBAND.” He obviously though some underhanded work was going on between his mom and this man. “Hey, what’s going on over there anyway? Why can’t I talk to her?”

“Ah, listen Kevin. Your mom has been in a serious accident. Why don’t you call someone to pick you up or I can have one of my guys come to take you home.”

Kevin was silent. It was bad. He knew it was bad. No one had to tell him, he could sense it. She would have asked to speak to him. She would have explained why Kevin was calling. She would have told him that it was a fender-bender but that everything was okay. She would have, she would have. . . . He almost dropped the phone. The color drained from this youthful face and a horrible sickening sensation spread through his body. He was generally an optimistic person which got on his friends’ nerves. But right now everything seemed too bleak. Too bleak to say ‘oh, it’s nothing, everything will be alright.’

“Kevin. Kevin? Are you still there son?”

“Uh, uh, yeah.” When Kevin spoke a lump bigger than a frog filled his throat and he found it to be nearly impossible to speak. He suddenly felt lightheaded on top of nauseous. His heart beat so fast that he had reason to believe it would leap out of his chest.

“Kevin, just stay put. I’ll have one of my guys come to get you. . . . Kevin? Do you understand? Did you hear me?”

“Yeah, yeah.” He said, trying to focus on his words.

“Stay there.”

“Okay.”

“Someone will be there in five minutes, just hold tight.” He ended the call, rushed over to one of the officers and explained the situation. He sighed. He knew a long night would await him.

That day marked the beginning of the end of both Kevin and Anthony’s life.