my missing light

                When you born in a dark place , when you open your eyes in this lonely life , when you feel that no one can feel you ,need you , makes you feel that you are special ,all what you feel is that you are useless , Why ?! No reasons, just for being you ,being yourself .



All these years passed day by day, it’s time for me to stand in my feet and face this life , this fate by anyway i choose , when i was trying to trust myself and know it well , I seen a very soft light comes to me, I didn’t knew what is it, I was wondering why it’s so warm ? I saw this light for many days I don’t know what made me leave my place and let me follow this light, I didn’t thought where this light will takes me all what were in my mind how to be near this warm light , I felt safe and comfortable , I followed that light day by day, minute by minute I felt it inside of me, I was waiting to arrive or even I see the whole light but I  didn’t, all what I did is following it blindly .



While am walking throw it I faced a lot of problems slowed me down a lot of thoughts controlled my mind ,but I got throw it and passed it without thinking by my brain, my heart was taking me there .



Following, following am I going to arrive?! Or I will keep walking  fallen  in the ground , I opened my eyes I saw something tells me use your brain not your heart , I saw the light goes farther and farther , oh wait for me , I was laying between the dark place in the left of me and the light in the right of me , where am I ? Am I lost? Oh god please help me I need you.



I turned my face left and saying I don’t want to go there in the dark after I saw the light then I turned right saying I can’t reach that light ,am tired of following I can’t do this again, am sick of all oh , but when I saw that light still there, but not like before ,it was shaken I said maybe I can take my own way my own life between the dark and the light , that’s was the idea when I was taking my own way I felt that I miss that warm , miss being behind that safe soft light, oh something strange takes me again behind this light when I just took 3 steps to it,  its disappeared ! Wait where is my light? I can’t see anything , am lost , am cold how can I live without my light I can’t I really can’t , I can’t breathe , am dying hardly , no please come back I won’t followed you please just I want to see your light and know that you still there , am I the reason , why did I took those 3 steps please come back .



Here I am in the dark again I won’t followed any light again whatever happens I really felt warm and safe but now am so much colder or I can’t use to be in cold after I was following my light . I suffered all these years until I forget that light, its came a day then its go again ,but every time I see it i remember all the specially lessons and the unforgotten moments.