the diary of john macdllan

My name is John Macdllen and I have decided to start writing
this diary because last night I got my draft letter. When the second Great War
started no one in my small town of Summet, North Dakota thought that it would
affect us at all. But after only one year all but two of the boys I went to
school with are fighting in it and that is saying something when there is only 200 of
us. So now its my turn to fight for my country. I do not know why im writing
this diary well I guess im doing it so if I die in the war I leave something
behind. Unlike most of my friends that are away fighting I don’t have I wife or
a kid, hell for that matter I don’t even have a girlfriend. And I think that is
why im writing this so if I die someone can read this and know that John a.
Macdllen was someone once. ....
.. ..
6-15-1940....
So im back. I just left home two days ago had to catch the
train to the training camp its going to take 3 days for me to get there. My
room mate on the train is a black fella by the name of Toby. I was shocked when
I first saw him I aint never seen a black person before we don’t got none in
my town, Well I guess there is going to be a lot of new thing I aint never seen, I thought he was going to be stupid but he a is good person not stupid at all I don’t know what my popa was talkin about. He said he got drafted too. I wish he would be going to the training camp with me
but black men don’t go to the same place as us white men do.....
.. ..
9-17-1940....
Im sorry I could not write. After getting to boot camp they
took my diary so I could not write. Im on a ship now going to Europe where the
war is going on I think we are going to stay in France for a few weeks then
from there we will go to where we are needed most.....
.. ..
9-30-1940....
We just got into France. I think tonight me and a few friends
are going for a night on the town. We better have all the fun we can before the
fighting starts.....
.. ..
9-31-1940....
I have just seen the most beautiful girl, no woman, I have
ever seen. She had great long black hair and a cute face on a petite body. In all
my 18 years of life I have never seen someone as beautiful. She was the waitress
at the bar we went to. I was so mesmerized by her beautify that I could not
even talk to her. Im going to go back and talk to her the next time im free.....
.. ..
10-9-1940....
I went back to the bar today and talked to the beautiful
waitress. I found out her name is Amy. I think she like me we got a date set up
for next week I hope it will go ok....
.. ..
10-15-1940....
Last night was the best day of my life. At 8 I walked over to
Amy’s house, a nice two story house on the suburbs of France, after meeting her
parents. We left and want to a nice restraint then we want to a bar by her
house at about 11 pm we got back to her house I thought that would be the end
of the night but I was wrong. When we got to her house she invited me in. the
next 3 hours was the best time in my life. I left my darling Amy 3 hours
latter. We had a date set out for 2 weeks to meet again.....
11-02-1940....
Im pissed I cant meet my Amy now because we are moving to Germany
to better fight the axis. I left a note for her telling her how to write me. ....
12-26-1940....
I just got a letter from Amy telling me she is pregnant. This
is the best gift I could have received. I pray I do not die in the war now that I have
something to live for.....
5-22-1941....
I have not got a letter from Amy in 2 months I pray so is ok.
Today I seen the most terrible thing, and that is saying something because I see
terrible thing all the time now, a camp for jews where they kill them we had to
fight all day but in the end we got control of the camp. What I saw in there
will haunt me for the rest of my life. Masses
of dead kids and woman, people that have not eaten in days they would attack us
for food when we cant give it to them couse I can kill them. The things I see
here I cant describe them there just to horrible. ....
6-12-1941....
I got a letter from Amy’s parents saying that she went to Germany
to help out her sister. I pray she is going to be ok....
8-14-1941....
We have came to another one of those horrible camps this time
even bigger then the last It might take days to take control....
8-21-1941....
We got control of the camp im going to go into it tomorrow....
.. ..
8-22-1941....
God please tell me it is a joke. Please tell me what I see
before my eyes is not true. God wake me from this dream. This can not be
happening I can not be true. But it is god most have a sick since of hummer to do
this to me, to show me what I can have and then take it from me like this. He most
know that I can never go on living now that all that I thought I had Is in
front of my eyes dying. My beautiful Amy with her now round stomach laying on a
bad her chest rising less and less with each breath her eyes slowly going out
of focus. Why would she go to Germany when she is a Jew. I write this as I hold
my dying Amy and my dying unborn kid. Why do we live when there Is so much pain
in doing so? Why do we wake up in the morning just to face a terrible world? I think
we do it so that we might find something to love. Something that might make facing
the pain and suffering seem not so bad. As I lay here holding my dying shield
of the pain and suffering in my hands I know that when they do die I will not
get up in the morning. For when my darling Amy takes her last breathe I will
pull the trigger. I leave this diary so that anyone who reads it will know that
John Macdllen was someone once, someone that in his 19 years of life had the best
thing any one can ask for. A reason to wake up!!!....