Hey Mom find me in the blackless

Hey Mom,



I've been lying to you for a while now

About how I can't sleep

About how my bed is too uncomfortable.



True I haven't gone to sleep till late in the mornin'

I stay up late, and sleep only a little

Hoping that you won't come out your room and catch me



But it is not that I'm doing something wrong

It's just that I dread sleeping

It's "blackless"



I used to dread sleeping

I felt as if I were dead



Not even darkness to tell me that I still am

No words, thoughts, emotions

Just "blackless"



It terrified me to think about it

basically dead for eight hours



But now that is not what keeps me awake

It is the time before the "blackless"

The time when I lie awake

When all my thoughts and problems can get me

With nothing to do but lay

It seems as though it is the perfect time for them to play



The mess with my mind

Remind me of all I'm lacking

All that is gone

Everything I never had

The tease and taunt me



Emotions I don't understand

Feelings I can't explain



I want out of this pain

I want out of this "blackless"



But how, how can I do that

It's coming for me now

when I can't keep my eyes open

the thoughts

and the "blackless"