One Person's View on Dating Websites

Thank you for choosing the following article to read.  It was written in the hopes of enlightening people to the many misconceptions, frustrations and letdowns of dating websites and the type of people that comprise the majority of them.  Before you join,  a lot of these dating sites lure you in by showing you young pretty and sexy women eager to meet you. You will receive email notifications by these sites showing you many women or men who match your description and are trying to contact you. Stop right there. 99.99% of it is phony. You go to read their email and the site won't let you open it until you pay the membership fee FIRST and then you find out its mostly a scam.  You never get a reply from them. You just fell into their hands as they suckered you in to use the plastic. My belief is that they may be paid to put their photos in there for the purposes of getting people to join.  They'll show you that they are from your general area or even town, BUT if you search other states as I did you’ll see their photos there as well. What’s that all about? Are you beginning to form a picture here?  You may receive a reply from one of them but you will clearly see that it is a generic letter they send to everyone.  They'll never answer any of your questions. Frankly, their reply will have nothing to do with the content of your email you sent to them at all.  Even though these sites do contain actual women in search of men your experience in trying to get them to reply to you will be a frustrating one.  Just prepare yourself to get very frustrated and annoyed by the lack of results in your honest effort to contact appealing candidates.  It’s a numbers game folks plain and simple.  99% of the people that comprise them fool around and mess with other people's minds because their minds are messed up. The remaining 1% are the real people, the ones having substance and the sincere desire in wanting to meet nice men or women and who answer respectable emails from like minded individuals.

Personally I have dropped out of the site I was a member of and moving on.  It doesn't take long for me to realize that when my boots are emitting the distinctive odor of horse manure, it's safe for me to reach the conclusion that I’ve been walking through it. I have better results in the Supermarket and it’s instantaneous.  You want the truth folks? Then read on. If the following is disturbing to you and undoubtedly it will be to many, be assured that it was not nearly as disturbing my overall experience on these dating websites.  Understand that I am not narcissistic, arrogant or conceited. If you must describe me or label me with some ridiculous term then just consider me as being a wise man and someone who is well read, educated and lives by  the Ancient Greek aphorism "Know yourself"  In Latin, the aphorism is generally given as nosce te ipsum.  The following is key: "We must set the soul free from it; we must behold things as they are. And having thus got rid of the foolishness of the body, we shall be pure and hold converse with the pure, and shall in our own selves have complete knowledge of the Incorruptible which is, I take it, no other than the very truth." (Socrates). 

No truer words ever spoken. It is a shame that few people in this world are aware of all the wisdom and education that can be learned by the readings of the ancient writers and philosophers of yesteryear.  I am a better person because of such men.  It was in my freshman year of high school where I learned about  this man called "Socrates"  and have always admired this great  philosopher and his wisdom my entire life. 

    Ok, so much for the intros and philosophy. Let's move on to the Experience. After taking the time to write several short complimentary intros to a variety of women, I would later discover that my email was either read and ignored or even better, unread and deleted. Here are the statistics:  Out of 100% of the emails I sent out,  1% of them were actually answered. What does that tell you?  First and foremost, sending a respectable email to someone you think would reply to you that goes unanswered is a real pet peeve with me. There is no reason for it not to mention that it is totally indecent and unrespectable.  I answered all emails and received many, even if it was just to wish them well.  Just what kind of people are these anyway and what's going on in their heads? That would be better answered by a therapist, not me.
Many intro letters I like to call them were received from widows. I replied with my condolences and encouraged them to keep on searching and credited them for the courage in doing so. To begin with, the higher percentage of women that I sent intros to would not be considered knockouts anyway. Just average looking women. The few knockout women I did contact just deleted my letter unread.  Those women will in all probability still be here when old and in rocking chairs still in search of "MR. Right". They live in the illusion that such a person exists.  I’m whispering when I say this….Don't tell them but MR. Right does not exist. He's not out there and never will be. I have two old girl friends that are living proof.  One just got back from Mexico after having a face lift.  Her face was fine; if anything it was her attitude that needed lifting. 

      I only contacted those women the website listed as a match for me and who I thought to be attractive and interesting.  You’ll read their profiles and discover that you have similar interests and more often than not, fit their description of what they are looking for and guess what? You never hear from them. Very puzzling for it must be great to have dozens of eager men to select from and be able to pick out the cream of the crop.....oops, did I say crop?  I meant Crap!  Believe me; I've heard many a woman tell me about all the losers and phonies that hit on them, and do remember that is both genders that I am speaking about here.  I don't do bars or clubs for we all know what kind of people they draw.  But unfortunately, those very same people are on these sites and on the Hunt. Out of the 1% of the women that I did make successful contact with, not one materialized into anything other than a just a couple of emails stating that they liked me and wished to go on but it  never went any further than just that. 

Here is my take on the 99% of the women that use these sites and what you may expect to encounter:  (Remember that 1% of an entire population is still a great number)

1.  The women are really confused individuals who don't know what they want to begin with and making a decision hasn’t anything to do with how intelligent, educated or successful they are. Many women today have more degrees than a thermometer, make more money that you or me, drive Volvos and BMW’s but these very women will stand in line at Dunkin D's for several minutes every day and still not arrive at a decision for what they want when it’s their turn and the clerk asks; “may I help you?”  DA!  Happens every day I get coffee. 

2. Don't have a clue in how to respond to a gentleman that is introducing himself.  They state that they are looking for a gent but wouldn't be able to recognize one if they were blinded by the light of the Holy Spirit as Saul was who many know later on to become the Apostle Paul.

3. They are self centered, shallow, rude and arrogant and think they have all the answers because of their position in life not to mention how materialistic they are as well.    Do I need to elaborate?

4. Photos: Now here's another one!  Don't believe all the photos you see. Although many are accurate and recent, beware; a lot more that are not.  Many use photos that are several years old. You'll also see a lot of face shots hiding the rest of their bodies (and for good reason) plus a lot of distant shots that require a microscope to make them out. They describe themselves as average body size in hopes that you’ll think 50 or so pounds overweight is ok.  No, it's not. It takes away from the women who work hard daily in maintaining themselves who are really average in size compared to others.


I met this one gal a few years ago on one of these websites that had a real nice face photo; a pretty long haired blonde with blue eyes, you know the strawberries and cream type?  We talked a bit and agreed to meet.  I drove one hour to meet her and when I saw her get out of her car I choked and  almost fell over.  Being the gentleman I was and still am, I went through with the luncheon date she had invited me to.  She was  an easy 250 lbs and at least 15 years older than her photo. She ordered and ate an entire 9 course dinner for lunch compared to my Caesar salad with a glass of water and a lemon wedge. Before leaving, she ordered 2 large  pizzas to go on top of it all.  Now I ask.  Just who is such a person and what is she thinking?  Mind you, she was not a dummy and had a high paying job. Did she really believe that by lying about her age and weight I would simply overlook this fact and be consumed by her inner beauty?  I may be considered visual and shallow by many for stating this but who cares about their tags and labels anyway?  I am the one on the date here not them. They are in all probability hypocrites anyway. They wouldn't be caught dead with a "blimp" (and I am referring to this particular individual when I use that word) such as her and her deceptive tactics. "Oh but she is really a beautiful person on the inside" many may say. She is a glutton plain and simple.  First and foremost; she was not beautiful at all on the inside; no one is.  Go to the morgue and tell me if what you see there is beautiful? (humor here)  You get the meaning I'm sure of what I am saying. Really folks, she lacked personality, was dishonest and didn't show any interest in an honest man that had just driven over one hour compared to her 10 minutes in meeting her for lunch. There are the 'blimps', glutoons and compulsive eaters or whatever you wish to refer to them as and there are people who are just a few pounds oveweight.  Some may find difficulty in accepting my word choices and descriptions. They’ll find it distasteful or degrading and accuse me of not being a compassionate person because of it. Those people are the "some" that I choose to ignore.  If their feelings are hurt the most I can say is I'm sorry because they are people with feelings but That's IT!  I do not feel sorry for them in the slightest. They need to get a life and focus their enegy on improving themselves, not me. You probably figured out by now that I don't give a hoot about "Political Correctness." I choose to live in reality and identify what is right from what is wrong with the assured expectations of being target to a few darts but that’s life.  A truth still cannot deny itself. 

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