What Suzy Had To Say

Sam sat slumped on the floor and stared at the unassuming mistletoe that hung on his living room archway. A half hour had passed since his party ended abruptly, and he's exhausted. The last fight he broke was between his parents, who had spent nearly an hour arguing about the affair his father had suddenly confessed to having had two decades ago, and his mother's announcement to everyone in the room that they finished too quickly in bed. Sam could hear his parents yelling as they drove away.

As with the others, Sam's parents started fighting shortly after standing underneath the mistletoe. The effect wasn't immediate, but it soon became clear to Sam that the mistletoe triggered something in people to suddenly tell truths they've been hiding. Because of that cursed plant, Sam was suddenly privy to his sister-in-law Monica's secret life as a stripper, his brother Bobby's propensity for Japanese animated porn, and his cousin Lou's escapades as a transvestite named Lola.

Sam didn't understand why things happened the way they did but knew he had to remove the mistletoe before it caused more problems. He walked over to the archway and was reaching for the mistletoe when he felt a moist nudge from Suzy. He stooped to give her a little peck on the snout, and held her head to him. "I love you, girl."

"Yeah? Well, I've never cared for you," Suzy snorted.

Sam's eyes widened, as he stared at his chocolate labrador. "Y-You can talk?!"

Suzy simply nodded to her owner. "Oh, and I just took a crap in your Chuck Taylors."

Sam stood, shook his head as he watched his beloved companion walk away, and sighed heavily as he snagged the mistletoe from the archway.



Written for 12/08/07 Daily Flash Fiction
Prompt: You hung mistletoe, but when people stand under it, they don't kiss, they begin telling the truth. What juicy things do you hear?
Word Count: 298