I'm pro - me

I have a reverential fear of abortion

I have witnessed several friend undergo this procedure, and frankly the aftermath I observed is utterly alarming.

I was clueless about the potential psychological side effects of abortion. I had always assumed women would feel a great sense of relief following this procedure. I figured once the physical discomforts that served as a reminder subsided, the grief would be reduced and soon replaced by freedom. These beliefs that I had developed couldn't be further from the truth, I was forced to rethink my position.

The post abortion reactions are extreme.

Kathy had an abortion. Within the year Kathy planned a pregnancy as a replacement to the one she felt she discarded. It was too painful for Kathy to get her period every month, as that was a monthly reminder of what she had done. Therefore, she planned on this substitute child to even the cosmic score if you will, balance the universe.

Angie's self esteem suffered after her abortion. She was deeply depressed for years and overwhelmed with profound guilt. Angie's nieces and nephews took a hit as well, her relationship with them quickly deteriorated. Angie found herself unable to hold the children, their tiny hands and unabashed laughter kept her horrific memories alive, so she avoided them.

I know people who have abused drugs and alcohol in effort to drown their haunting reflections. Post abortion friends tell me they can't attend baby showers, walk down the baby food isle at the grocery store or even look at or be around our other pregnant friends. The painful reminders are just too much for them to bear. Some of these women have even confessed to thoughts of suicide to end the movie that just plays over and over again in their minds. The lives of these women have changed so much since they terminated their pregnancies, it's such a pivotal place in time that they often inject unidentified "before and after's" into conversations. The unspoken defining moment that seemingly changed everything.

I don't think any of these people anticipated battling this kind of revulsion afterward. In fact, I know that Angie and Kathy were thunderstruck by how out of control they felt. Abortion seemed to have interrupted or tainted every aspect of them... every anniversary of the event, every mothers day, every everything!

Pro this, pro that, I don't know. Had these women thought about how they would feel after, would they have had an abortion? If you knew women had struggled with these same feelings before you did it, would you still do it? I think people are always looking for the solution to get them through moment, not thinking about all the future moments to come.

Are we just picking the lesser of two evils? Which one is easier to get over?