Awaysick - Scene of Chapter Ten.

Okay, my technique is so dodgy! I'm so sorry, I really should be posting the story in its actual order, but I just haven't been able to actually write it that way! Eep. So, this section is from Chapter 10, and if you've seen the overview I put up, this is the part when Cokey goes to the party and finds Steven with another girl. Of course, this piece of writing may make it seem like Cokey is being a little bit melodramatic, but she's supposed to be obsessed with Steven... so yes. Arrgh, I'm such a rambler! Again, I'm sorry, but I guess this is better than putting nothing up at all! Thankyou! :]

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         Cokey felt like she was about to vomit. Her breath was short; her wet sobs were causing her skin to be sticky, and her fringe was gumming itself to her forehead. She pushed the hair abruptly away from her eyes and caught sight of herself in the heavily embellished mirror. A small whimper escaped her lips as she absorbed her reflection. Twin streams of black mascara lined her cheeks and touched her mouth. Her face was red, blotchy and her eyes were bloodshot beneath her damp hair. A long way away, the thunderous rhythms of the party went on, and when she heard a door slamming a little way off, the vivid image of Steven and the beautiful brunette girl entwined penetrated her mind again. She wanted to leave. She needed to get away from the party, away from where Steven and she were. She hurtled herself out of the ornate bathroom and hastily pushed her way between two figures standing in the doorway, chest heaving. She could only stare at the ground as she frantically stumbled down the spiral staircase and towards the large doors of the entrance downstairs. While she was sure that her gasping bleats were completely audible to everyone she passed, she couldn’t bring herself to raise her head and watch where she was going. She only hoped that she wouldn’t trip and topple to the ground. She wanted nothing more than to hide her face as best she could. She knew none of these people, but she couldn’t bear the idea of any of them seeing her this way, her face marked with hurt without understanding. Her head kept to the ground, she felt the tiny, salty droplets line her chin and fall, splattering helplessly on the floor as she clambered desperately through the dancing, laughing throng towards the front door. Her vision was blurred due to her moist fringe and tears, and her head was pounding between her ears because of the blaring music. From underneath her clinging hair, she caught view of the vase she had noticed upon arriving, and gasped as she realised she was almost at the exit. Her lip trembled as she found she began to run towards the door, and she sought freedom from the stifling party even more. However, it was not the door she reached. With a moaning cry that came out of both frustration and shock, Cokey felt her body crash against another. She felt her face connect with someone’s chest, and it was warm. She was swiftly ready to detach herself and pelt to the exit again, when the owner of the chest placed their hands upon her arms, and clasped her kindly. She stood motionless.
‘Cokey, you came.’ She recognised his voice immediately, but she couldn’t bring herself to look up at Thomas. Instead, she continued to slouch into his chest. The exterior of his jacket was comfortable against her blotched cheeks.
‘Cokey,’ he said again, ‘are you okay?’ She didn’t respond. She didn’t want to talk at all. She didn’t even want him to talk. She wanted him to be the silent stranger with the warm and welcoming jacket who would let her lean against his chest but wouldn’t have to ask if she was alright. But Thomas wanted to talk. Slowly, he placed a hand beneath her chin and raised her head to look at him. She was still breathing uneasy, and fresh tears were dribbling down her cheeks. She felt anxious as she watched him take her in; he surveyed her patchy, red face and the smudged mascara stains. His face was passive when he said,
‘What happened?’
She remained quiet once again. She didn’t want to tell him anything, not least what had happened to make her erupt into noisy cries in the middle of the party. Despite receiving no answer, he watched her still, and she hated it. She only wanted to feel better without having to tell anybody why she needed to. She didn’t want to be stared at. She wanted comfort without any questions asked of her.
Thomas’ hand was still underneath her chin, and his eyes were searching hers for some sort of explanation, something to account for the state she was in. She wanted him to stop watching her; his eyes pierced her and half of her wanted to struggle against his grasp. Yet, the other half wanted him to stay, to not say anything to her, but only to not let go of her arms as she tried to pretend she hadn’t seen what she had in the bedroom upstairs…
‘Cokey, I don’t-‘
Her eyes widened as he began to speak again.
Why can’t he just stay quiet? She asked in her own mind, and she found herself leaning forwards, standing on her toes in order to reach his level. His mouth was open slightly in confusion as she did so, but he didn’t try to speak. She felt him inhale, taken aback, as she moved towards him and kissed him deeply. She ignored the shocked rigidity of his lips and slid her tongue into his mouth. Within seconds he gave in and was kissing her back with equal intensity. He moved his hands smoothly up her back, letting one rest upon her shoulder blade.
She placed her fingers in his hair, and noticed how different he was to Steven. While Steven had a smell that was both of the ocean and something much sweeter combined, Thomas smelled like the restaurant, and his hair was somewhat flattened from being trapped in a hairnet too long and too often. She heard him make a small grumble in his throat, and felt him begin to pull slowly away.
Once they had parted, he did not talk, but only looked at her blankly. Feeling slightly more composed and able to see properly now, Cokey appreciated his unemotional expression. She swallowed hard, searching for breath, and whispered,
‘Let’s go.’
Thomas nodded. While he still looked deadpan, his voice was hurried and breathy when he replied,
‘My car’s down the street.’
With that, he took firm hold of her hand and led her to the door. The air outside was cool, and soothed her face as though the staining lines her tears had left were burns. Thomas was walking quickly, occasionally turning his head to look back at her as he went. One of his hands was still clutching hers fixedly, while the other appeared to be fishing for his car keys in his pocket.
Cokey felt as though her breathing was becoming steadily easier as they distanced themselves from the party more with every rapid step. The crowds of partygoers in the street were thinning as she scuttled clumsily behind Thomas. She bit her lip fiercely, trying to focus intently on the back of his head, trying to force herself not to think of what she had found in the master bedroom.
When eventually they halted, Cokey allowed herself to take note of exactly where they were. There was nobody wandering this end of the street. Cokey could barely make out what she knew had to be the catalytic streams of light of the party in the distance; the rest of the street was engulfed in darkness. She wasn’t worried or scared. She knew that Thomas would have parked such a way away because his car was so new, and he was so protective of it.
Thomas.
She turned around to see him standing beside the familiar car, keys ready in the door lock. He was watching her attentively.
‘Where do you want to go?’ He said.
She took a deep breath, before stealing one cautionary glance at the surrounding street and walking towards him stealthily.
‘Nowhere’ she murmured as she reached him, and she kissed him again. He reacted immediately this time, and she knew he had understood. He wrapped his arms across her back and pulled her gently closer to him. He shifted his body so as to reveal the car’s back door to her, and as she turned the handle to open it, he scattered kisses on her cheek and down her neck. Once the heavy red door had been opened, she sidled steadily into the backseat, laying on her back and waiting for Thomas to join her. He did so at once, looking at her earnestly as he crawled along the seat until his face was directly above hers. He was just centimetres away now. The next moment was eerily silent, and while Thomas appeared to be comfortable with the fact that all they could hear was the other breathing, Cokey struggled with being so close to him without the invulnerability of kissing. His eyes stayed on her. His lips parted.
‘Cokey, I didn’t know-‘ His slow words only made her feel more awkward, and she kissed him once again, dying for the quiet comfort she received from him before. This time it was Thomas who initiated any further passion, as his tongue entered her mouth and he slid his hand down her left side. His fingers clung to the edge of her sequinned navy top. He sent long, drawn out kisses to her neck. She opened her eyes, and her view was met only by his mass of slightly dirty chestnut hair. His hair was so different to Steven’s…
Their eyes met. He had raised his head to look at her, and took her hand with his.
‘You’re really beautiful, Cokey.’ As he muttered it, his eyes searched her with an excruciating intensity. She hated him instantly for saying it. She shifted her gaze from his abruptly and pushed the hand he held along her stomach until his fingers were placed on the buttons of her top. He took the hint, but forced her to face him once more when he leant over and kissed her lips as he scrabbled with her shirt. He removed it gradually, punctuating the material’s every movement with warm kisses upon the newly stripped areas. When eventually she lay bare beneath him, he regarded her with an expression she did not recognise. Though she was entirely exposed, she did not feel nervous or vulnerable in front of him, the way she had with Steven. Thomas’ thoughts of her this way were nothing compared to what Steven might think.
‘I’m going to get a…’ Thomas indicated the glove box at the other end of the car. Cokey nodded hastily. She watched him scramble between the driver’s and passenger’s seats and towards the glove box in search of a condom. He unlatched the small rectangular door and the yellow light within flooded the car’s interior. The light allowed Cokey to see him turn back to look at her, just as he had when they abandoned the party. Then the light vanished.
When Thomas returned to the back seat, it was with swallow breath. Cokey wasn’t apprehensive as he approached. He took his place above her again, and slipped his arms behind her back, pulling them closer. They were in a tight embrace. From over Thomas’ shoulder, Cokey had a clear view out of the car’s back windscreen now. She could plainly see the curving road of the black street, and the distinct gleam of the party in the distance. Thomas mumbled something that she didn’t quite hear, and she wondered to herself whether Steven could be thinking about her. And then it began.

When Cokey woke up, for a moment she forgot what had happened. But then the moon’s great light shone down on her face and she realised how exceptionally cold it was in the car. She shivered and took a deep breath, the pale white mist escaping her mouth as she exhaled. She sat upright, peering out of the window and wondering what the time was. Certainly, a few thin shafts of milky dawn speckled the horizon, and there were only a couple of yellow dots illuminating the far off party house now. Cokey suspected it was very early. She sighed, rubbed her own arms to spread warmth and then stiffened at the sound of a weary cough behind her. She turned and looked at Thomas engulfed in a deep sleep. He was oddly contorted, his neck at a funny angle and arms bent close to accommodate his long body. It was at this moment Cokey realised that, despite the events of last night, she hadn’t actually looked at him properly up until now. She had never seen him without his apron and hairnet, and it seemed strange to see him dressed the way he was now. Cokey watched, and it was almost as if the person in the jeans and large brown jacket wasn’t Thomas at all. She remembered how pleasant that jacket had felt to her last night, and how they had rushed to get to his car, and everything in between. She remembered how different he had been to Steven; not just the way he smelled or how messy his hair was, but also how Thomas had been much slower than Steven had, and how he had showered her with flattery all the way throughout. She didn’t like that at all. Their intimacy had lessened the sting of last night, but this was Thomas, Thomas who was the cook at Evers N’ Afters Eatery, and he wasn’t supposed to say things like that to her. She remembered how he had watched her, held on to her afterwards, and how she had fallen asleep a long time after he had.
She continued to sit in the quiet, wintry rear of the immense station wagon and recounted every aspect of Thomas’ action the night before in scrutinising detail. Then she realised that the very last thing she wanted was to be in the car when he woke up.
She fidgeted in her seat, considering her options. Acutely fearful of stirring him, Cokey slinked sideways past Thomas, steadily along the seat and towards the car door. Her metallic jade ankle boots lay on the floor to her right, having been discarded when she and Thomas entered the car, and she bent down to retrieve them with only the sound of her sedate breaths accompanying her. Shoes in hand, Cokey sighed and turned to Thomas once again. She watched him as she felt for the handle of the door behind her, determined not to make any unnecessary noise that might rouse him. Having found her grip, she gently pushed the door and immediately felt a surge of fresh, crisp air against her skin. Thomas didn’t stir. Moving backwards, Cokey heaved herself from the car and peered at Thomas through the window as she pushed the door away from her, separating them. The faint click signalling its closure made her release a heavy sigh, and without further thought or any more glances at Thomas, she began to walk down the street. Clutching her preposterously vibrant shoes, she was only metres from the car when she started running. Panicking at the thought of Thomas waking and see her, she scuttled between two ornamental shrubs seated within a particularly ostentatious landscaped garden and darted in the direction of home.



Aw, Cokey why? Lol! :]