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by Acme Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E · Monologue · Entertainment · #1284452
Why I believe in the power of terrible spelling
I love bad spelling, on the whole.. hole..hoel..

I just can't stand it when people get precious about it, after all, most school systems now introduce a series of phonetic learning to introduce the concept of wordsmithing to impressionable kids.

I'm English. Surely, as my native tongue, I'm allowed to use it how I want? All spelling was entirely subjective until Mr Johnson created his Dictionary. He's dead. He won't be offended by me.

The problem I've always had is in regard to double letters. In my opinion, they are only necessary when making a distinction between jumping up and down and optimistically desiring the best: hoping.

And why don't American's like my U's? Colour, Flavour, Humour, Etc. I like my U's. I need my U's.

Just don't get me started on punctuation. I think lots of commas are pretty.

--------------------------------

"I before E, except after C!"

Right.

So, 'wierd' that 'thier' doesn't fit in the rhyme? I've amended it:

I before E, exept after C
and any odd words that there happen to be
I beforfe E, except when it's 'weird'
and when you can write it illegibly
I before E, except after C
but not when you write 'conscientiously'?

Always mistrusted that rhyme.

the following is a fabulous review I received from Meg Author Icon - Thank you!

With A Review For "The Badd SpelorOpen in new Window.:
My dear Badd Spelor

One thing I learned when I went to school
Was always obey the golden rule.
And now you've gone and wrecked it for me,
I'll never believe now that it's "i" before "e".

I'm Aussie, and English is the language we use,
And we, like you, have a penchant for "u's".
Humour's a lonely word for me too,
If I can't make a funny including You too.

One little hiccup I found in your rhyme
Was a word that you used demonstrating the crime
of not obeying the hard and fast law
that "e" follows "i" and does not come before.

The word that you mentioned, and I query, is "thier"
I believe it's spelt "their" as the rule does declare.
I'm not being picky, I love your neat poem,
I'll get back in my box now, and head off back home.


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