Pulling the Trigger

The world seems bleak, and grey. Not "right", if there is such a thing. Everywhere I look, I see the familiar surroundings of my life. Yet, it's all different. They air it self hangs heavy and stagnant, suffocating any wisper of reality from my mind. The walls grow dim and cold, rushing against me. The floor stretches to lengths unknown and the cieling comes crashing down upon my body. In a feverish whirlwind, gravity becomes obsolete. Suspended in air, the floor under and the cieling above... The walls on each side bouncing against one another, fighting for space. The outside world is grim and merciless, askew from the reality I once knew. Suddenly, paralized in this nightmare, I fight for breath. Gasping on air only to find it does little. Clawing at the walls, I pray to be released from this horror. I call out, but only hear a faint squeek. No more, no less.

My skin screams in agony... Must be heard, must get out. Held captive, wishing to be rescued. I must move, run ... Anything... I must get out! but where? There is no where to go. I must get out... Get out of myself. Out of the body that holds me prisoner in this place. This place that releases me when all hope is lost, only to snatch me back when everything feels safe. My soul screams, tearing at my skin, trying to free itself. The skin crawls back and doesn't back down. I must release it!

A fog rolls in and a haze sweeps over my mind. Fighting to see reality, the nightmare tuants until all is lost. My skin is burning, my body aches, my mind is fuzzy. What just happened? I fight to regain composure, to remember what happened. Darkness. Nothing but a hazed frenzy. Something pulled the trigger. Have I hit bottom? Is this insanity? Nothing can describe the sickening feeling in my stomach. Hold the cannon steady... Don't let another trigger go off.