Operation: T.A.M.I.N.G.- Bonus File

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operation o.r.o.

odd

rurouni

outburst

*****

         The little spawns of the nether-realm began their heinous chuckles once again, but this time they made a motion with their fingers for the robotic arms to do their work. Those arms complied very willingly, squeezing on poor Numbuh Two and attempting to send him unconscious on the sheer waves of pain they were releasing…

         (T-T-TA-TUNG!) Suddenly, the metallic twanging of guitar strings broke though the boy’s pain, as if coming from a hidden sound system somewhere in the area. Jerked away from the sideshow, each of the children turned towards the direction of this musical twitter, including the trussed up Number Two. A small figure stood alongside the shrubbery, its face concealed by the glint of round eyeglasses. "You’ll put him down gently, you will," it said coolly, raising its gaze to reveal dangerous, narrow eyes. "If you wish to escape a trip to the doctor, that is."

         The DCFDTL stared blankly at the newcomer for around three full seconds, then turned to each other with a question in their eyes. "What in the world is this?" they asked amongst themselves, each hoping that one of the others would have that answer. Being somewhat of a hive mind, however, none of them did.

         Laura Limpin had emerged dramatically from beyond the windowpane, walking forward at an unhurried, even pace. For one reason or another, she was now wearing a fuchsia kimono top and large samurai pants, and her left cheek was adorned with a star-shaped imprint that looked like it had been applied by a Christmas cookie cutter. Cool acoustic guitar music was playing her approach as she strode stoically to Numbuh Two and the DCFDTL, fingering a sword stuck through her belt. It was a Japanese katana, with a jet-black scabbard, and a wicked, curved blade concealed within.

         Numbuh Two, still ensnared by the robotic arm’s mighty hands, had recovered just enough from the assault to give the situation a quick once-over. What he saw was enough to make him forget about the pain entirely, and he was mesmerized by the girl just as the Delightful Children were. "Black hair, braids sticking up from the sides of her head," he whispered to himself. "It can only be Badtousai the Manslayer, the girl of legends!"

         "I don’t like that you deploy a robot on a boy that carries no weapons," this fourth-grade fervor was saying, grasping the hilt of her blade with a deft touch. "Your opponent this night…will be me." With a flourish, she drew her katana, which turned out to be just a toy made of gray plastic, bearing its cheap origins on the side of the blade: TAIWAN. But the manner in which she carried the sword, the fierce fighting stance she took, and the fact that a pan flute were now playing alongside the stylish guitar music, it was clear that the Badtousai was a force to be reckoned with, even alongside the Grownup Gorilla Gang.

         Nevertheless, the DCFDTL were largely unimpressed by this Halloween heirloom. "A Plastic-Edge-Sword?" they chortled, regaining their earlier candor. "You cannot slay even a hamster with a thing like that."

         "I do not intend to slay anyone with my blade," she said softly, somehow managing to fit her statement in perfectly with the music that even now was still going on. "Ever since I slew that defenseless caterpillar in the scouts, I have taken a vow never to kill again. However," The Plastic-Edge-Sword was raised upright in preparation for an overhead slash. "That doesn’t mean I have anything against bludgeoning them repeatedly with a blunt object. You will be put to rest for a spell, that you will."

         The DCFDTL were standing laconically in the same position, flabbergasted beyond belief. "She speaks in a manner even stranger than our own," they murmured quietly, blue eyes blinking in sporadic bursts.

         The Badtousai acknowledged their criticism with a curt snort, and tightened her grip on her weapon. Wavering with pumping adrenaline, the katana’s ersatz edge somehow managed to shine in the moonlight, reflecting the petrified peepers of the DCFDTL. "Now…!" the girl uttered, a Big Bad growl entering her normally amiable attitude. "PREPARE!!!" And she was off like a lighting bolt, making for the tower-like contraption, Numbuh Two, and the five stony-faced children.

         Nearly loosing all sense of time and place under the Badtousai’s wolf-like gaze, the DCFDTL nevertheless managed to pull themselves together one more time. "G-get her!" they ordered the cybernetic spire, like a cowardly commander with half a battalion. The robotic arms took the bidding in stride, dropping Numbuh Two like a sack of laundry onto the wet grass. Then they made a grab for the rushing girl, trying to crush her with a single clench of the fists.

         The gargantuan gloves made their move on the Badtoudai, moving the air aside in a loud whoosh. But their fingers met only her fading afterimage, and their logarithms were at a loss for what to do. The DCFDTL looked around for girl, and gasped at the discovery that their opponent was already high in the air, turning a quick somersault. She darted straight for the tower from her aerial apex, then raised her sword for a hard-edged, finishing blow.

         The Delightfuls’ mouths hung upon in stupefaction. "She overcame our mechanical appendages!" they cried out, suddenly having the urge to announce every single event that happened in the battle. "Inconceivable!"

         Numbuh Two was less stunned by this incredible feat of agility, but also concentrated his efforts on observing the Badtousai’s movements. (She’s using her god-like speed to evade the robotic arms with a single flying leap!) he thought in a rush, leaning forward from his spot on the grass. He continued to watch in awe as the girl plummeted towards destiny, her braids blowing behind her like the feathers of a Musketeer.

         The Badtousai was closing in on the robotic arms, which were neglecting to provide a suitable defense. With a cold fury in her eyes, she brought her blade up to bear. "SKUNKY SCOUT STYLE SPECIAL ATTACK!" she hollered out, her voice now coming out deep and manly. "OISHII SHOKORA WAZA!!!"

         In a flash of gray, the toy sword was brought down upon the robotic arms. Plastic met steel in a violent clash, with the latter collapsing into heaps of scrap upon the Limpin’s front yard. Surrounded in a shower of metal debris, the Badtousai made a perfect landing onto the grass, crouching upon impact. With a look in her eyes slightly less fierce than the one she gave the tower, the girl tilted her gaze to regard the DCFDTL…which was enough to make all five of them feel like wetting their pants.

         "I have no attachment to the name ‘Badtousai’" she said quietly, as if just to herself. "Just the same, it’s quite fun to tear things apart with a plastic katana." That katana, the Plastic-Edge-Sword, was now in the process of being put away by the Skunky Scout Samurai. "I’m afraid your contraption will no longer be able to grab children properly with either of those hands. You should leave now, that you should." The cross guard clanked against the sheath in finality, though it was clear that it could, and would, be used again, if there was any more trouble to be dealt with.

         The DCFDTL needed no encouragement in order to take this advice. "AAHHH!!!" they squealed, eyes bugging out of their sockets in a comical fashion. Running like the wimpy little rich kids they were, the quintet made off for their manor in another neighborhood. A few seconds passed, and they had already disappeared beyond the curvature of the hill, leaving only the stylish imprints of their Oxfords as memoirs of their visit.

         After the last clomp of a shoe had faded into the night, Numbuh Two sprang up from his seat on the ground and ran towards the silent young lady. Excitement in his eyes, he immediately burst into a flurry of complements and praise. "T-that was amazing!" he managed to get out, the huge smile on his face sparkling even in the darkness. "How on earth did you do such cool moves?!"

         The Badtousai stood motionless for a moment more, then slowly span towards the boy. But when she had come around to fully face Numbuh Two, it was a much different girl dressed in that odd Meigi-era clothing. "That’s no biggie!" Laura bubbled, folding her hands behind her back. "Samurai anime is a big hit among us Skunky Scouts, that it is!"

         Numbuh Two goggled at this remark, his lip curling into an indescribable grimace. Laura just giggled innocently, playing absently with the sash on her belt.

end transmission []

Liner Notes:

Oishii Shokora Waza- Tasty Chocolate Technique (sounds like a move Misao would use, eh? ^_^X)