The Reflection

Awareness settles over me as the people hurry past their gazes fixed intently on the crowd surrounding the figure ahead. I cannot tell if it is the breeze from the crowd or the misty rain just beginning to fall, but I shiver with goose bumps erupting up my arms like cascading dominoes. Moving with the crowd, I catch sight of what is causing all the commotion. I can just see her long blond hair spread across the grass, and her head hanging limp to one side. The listless eyes stare unfocused while blood trickles from her partially opened mouth. Pressure grips my chest as I fight the screams rising up my throat. The shock of this vision robs my memory that late afternoon. I cannot remember anything that happened before I gazed at that lifeless young body lying besides the highway.
The growing crowd begins to attract more onlookers. Faces are pressed against the cars windows as they slow down heading the flares in the road. They see the Good Samaritans gathered over the young woman watching desperately for some kind of response that would indicate hope. The whispers of those gathering around grow louder as they talk without looking from the scene before them. I look from one face to the other as they speak to no one in particular, their voices echoing the thoughts of their minds.
“Did you see what happened?” one would ask.
“Going too fast!” replied the man next to him with total assurance.
“This is where the car left the road,” another pointed out nodding his head towards the black tire streaks.
“Wasn’t wearing a seatbelt, you know” a motherly type offered as she held a crumpled tissue wiping her eyes and nose every few minutes.
A nagging small voice inside my head urged me to move closer. I circled the intimate little group who were intensely working to hold on to her fragile life until help could arrive. Their bodies shielded hers from me blocking my sight and I kept moving slowly looking for an opening. My gaze was drawn to the approaching flashing lights and haunting sirens maneuvering through the slow moving cars on the road.
The rescue team ran towards the crowd carrying their tools of trade, their walkie-talkies blasting instructions and updates from their shoulders. The helpful bodies parted to let the team through and the medics went to work on the young woman lying so still upon the ground.
I stood with the rest of those gathered slightly behind the rescue team. Looking at the faces of the crowd, I could easily read their thoughts. Fear spread among the onlookers like a contagious epidemic. It was weird, I thought, to see how these strangers who did not know each other before this tragedy begin to comfort each other unconsciously hoping for a miracle as they watched the medics do their job. The clank of the stretcher being lifted brought my gaze back to the young woman who was now covered head to toe beneath the stark white sheet headed for the ambulance. The flashing red lights were off and the sirens silent now that the emergency had passed. The rescue team moved slowly and disappointedly picking up their equipment.
Time that had stood still began to tick again. The sense of urgency deflated with that somber scene and the crowd turned back toward their vehicles. Strangers again, I watched as they rejoined their lives they had paused minutes before. One by one the cars, silently and politely, pulled back onto the highway. The EMT’s slowly walked the scene picking up the evidence and searching for artifacts that would be included in the reports waiting for them back at the station. I wanted to help, contribute in some way. I needed to understand how a life could end so quickly. Moving towards one of the rescue team seeking answers to my questions, I stopped short as I saw the dark disappointment in his face. He walked right past me wrapped up in his own silent world. So intently focused on his mission, he did not even look up at me as I approached.
It was time for me to leave. The air had grown colder and I began to shiver again. There was a feeling of emptiness caused by the disappearing crowd. Shadows grew longer as the red flares began to extinguish. Turning away I walked back towards my car. The red of my jeep could be seen just behind some of the emergency vehicles and as I searched my pockets for my keys, I began to walk in that direction. Strange I thought, I always keep my keys in my pocket. For just a moment, I panicked hoping that I had not dropped them somewhere in this vast grassy area. The keys were quickly forgotten when I saw the damage on the car.
“For Christ’s sake!” I yelled at no one in particular. “What the hell?” It looked like one of the emergency vehicles had sideswiped my car.
Most of the EMT’s were sweeping up the debris from the highway and collecting the personal items that had flung from the young woman’s car in the crash. The police were directing traffic safely around the cleaning crew and urging the bottleneckers to move along trying to avoid another mishap at the scene. The traffic noise drowned out my voice as I tried to get someone’s attention about the damage. No one was listening which fueled my anger even further. I started pacing next to the car trying to calm myself trying to force the fog from my brain so I could think clearly what to do.
The windows on my car started to vibrate with the low rumble of a slow moving semi coming towards me on the highway. The bright lights of the approaching truck blinded me and I turned to avoid them covering my eyes. Taking my hand away, I looked at the cracked spidered window turned into a mirror for just a fraction of a second from the bright headlights. Seconds was all that it took for me to see the distorted reflection. Blinking furiously, I was drawn into a vacuum void of noise. The fog evaporated from my brain and my lost memories came flooding back suddenly. My chest tightened in pain again. I remember now, and this time, I let the scream escape.