The Scandal of Young Mr. Cello

Malachi Cello
A curious fellow
Carousing with barbers
In Ventimore Square.

Quickly he stumbles
"Oh, pardon!" he mumbles
As he slips past the girls
With vainglorious airs.

A trifle bewildered
He dances with Mildred
And Helen, and Ethel,
And Miss Baudelaire.

Just one second later
Bumps into the waiter
Who's busy arranging
A haute love affair.

Up goes a trifle
And out comes a rifle
As the tritely trussed girls
Shriek and wail in despair.

Out in a blinking
Yes, gone in a winking
Young Malachi Cello
Runs off down the stairs.

But from the back door
Comes the faint muffled roar
Of Malachi yelling
"Goodbye now, take care!"