Hidden

She paced slowly across the floor of her room, her mind finally made up. She couldn't stand the pain of hiding it any longer, tonight she was going to finally tell him how she felt. She nervously picked at her fingernails as her mind raced with the possibilities of the interview.

"All he can do is say no," she reminded herself, trying to gain the confidence she so sorely needed. There was a knock at the door, and her nerves sent her flying across the room to see his smiling face.

He grinned at her, happier than she'd ever seen him. At the sight of him her heart began to race, anxious, but trying to conceal the overwhelming feelings that had been bombarding her as late, she asked him how his day went.

"You remember that girl I was talking to at the restaurant a couple of days ago?"

Yes, she remembered her. She had sat and watched them conversing out of the corner of her eye, barely able to concentrate on the others at the table who were demanding her attention.

"Well, I asked her out today."

Her heart plummeted to the floor, but the self-control she prided herself on came to her rescue and she forced herself to seem pleased, and even managed to give him her best wishes. Her mind raced as they spoke of the details concerning his news, wondering how much this change of events would change their relationship. They had always been extremely close and she had grown accustomed to his frequent attempts to take the relationship to the next level. Recent events had finally brought the truth of her feelings to head and she had convinced herself he still felt the same about her. This news tore at her heart, threatening to rip it in two.

Finally, he left to take care of other things. No sooner had the door closed upon him, then she crumpled onto her bed, sobbing. She knew she should rejoice that he was finally happy, but at the moment, she wanted nothing more than to drown her frustrations in her tears. Later she'd be happy for him but right now, she needed to focus on how to control her emotions.

For years she'd struggled to master the ability to remain calm and collected even when her heart was breaking...an art she prided herself on. Never would she let him know how much his news had killed her, it would hurt him and ruin his happiness if he knew. She sat up and wiped her eyes.

"Enough," she said to the empty room as she crossed to her computer and sat in front of the screen. She opened a window and deftly began to type small talk to a friend over the messenger screen. She would get through this and someday, she was certain, he would find his way into her arms.