Holding On

The air felt tense and I was suddenly pent up. My temples began to throb, my eyes flutter. Angry with myself, I closed my eyes and allowed my weak knees to crouch to the ground. Chin connected to collarbone, I held myself to the ground. I was not going to give in to the pull. <i>Not this time. Please, not now.</i> I felt a burning sensation smack through my arms as my hands fell from my head to the merciless concrete. <i>Don’t take me.</i> A chill shot through my body, knocking my feet out from under me. My body lost control. The force knocked my lifeless corpse to the satin clouds. I was gone.

“Miss Quelm!” I awoke with a snap as a book was smashed on the desk in front of my face. I ran a tingling hand through my hair and stared up at the teacher with sullen eyes. The class laughed around me as my fingers kneaded my wrist, attempting to wake it up. I felt numb all over.
As for the rest of the class period, I slouched in my chair and propped my head on my hand. I was successful in staying awake, but I failed my class participation grade for the day. When the bell rang, I crouched down in my seat and waiting for the class to file out. Mrs. Lern ignored my presence and left the room, probably heading to lunch duty. Sighing, I slipped my sweater over my tank top and slid my feet back into my sandals.
The sun was hot and the school was humid. Long strands of blond hair stuck to my face as it fell from my loose ponytail. Lunchtime at Scardlere High meant two things to me: leaving campus and going for a run on the endless beach or reading in the shade of the hidden forests of trees that surrounded the front of the campus. Scardlere, California’s most prided and dreamed about boarding school housed its students on campus. I basically lived at campus during the day and slept there at night. But when the last bell of the day rang, I was able to leave campus and the surrounding area to go to work and to explore the boardwalk. The students were permitted exactly two hours of peace away from the pressure of schoolwork and studies. I became accustom to allow my feet to guide me down the familiar path to the secluded bay and on this day, presumably to swim. The bay was hidden by a cluster, more like a mountain, of boulders, in which the path winded through. It was also about a mile from campus, and it seemed to be directly beneath the blistering sun. I never encountered anyone on the tiny part of the beach where I would swim.
The hot sand burned my feet as I shed my clothing. I would swim naked, and then lie in the sun to dry before heading back to campus. Today, the water felt tense against my taught muscles as I stroked my way far out from the ebbing tide. My shoulders were in knots and my head was pounding. The water was clear but when I would open my eyes under the clear blue, the salt would burn them, causing me to fluster around before regaining my sight. Finally, I decided on swimming back to shore to lay in the sand and let the water rush and rise over my whole body, engulfing me in foam. My skin tingled under the sun as I soaked up the rays. I allowed my eyelids to lazily flutter over my tired eyes and fell into a deep slumber.
“Brooke… I need you now.”
I could feel a presence overcome my woken body. <i>Not now!</i> Sand curled between my fingers as I forced my body to relax. <i>No.</i>
“Come to me, B.”
<i>Shit…</i>
The warm sand became a distant memory as I slipped away. My ears rang with a sorrowful yet sweet song, his song. My naked body became enveloped in the warmth that was his embrace.
“I’ve been calling.”
He caressed my neck with his smooth lips and held me closer to his broad chest.
<i>Gabriel…</i>
“Don’t try to escape me.”
I sighed long and hard. I couldn’t hold back, I needed him. It had been too long. I melted into his embrace and rested my head on his shoulder. My hand swept to his silky hair. Our feet left the ground, no longer startling me as it had in the beginning.
“I’ve missed you…”

His cheeks flushed as the water swallowed our waists. My legs wrapped around his muscular thighs as we floated in the chilled water. Waves crashed around our bodies, jostling his hips into me. My hands found the sweetest curves of his wet body as my quaking lips met his with welcome. He pulled my body hard against his as I gasped and held him.
<i>I need you…</i>

“Brooke. Earth to Brooke!”
“Is she on something Shel?” I cracked a swollen eye and waited for the blurry image before me to clear.
“What is that? Brooke! You’re soaking wet!”
A hard body crashed down on the mattress beside my lifeless heap. My roommate Shellie Winters shook me horribly, forcing me to crash down to earth. My eyes wandered from her concerned face to her boyfriend’s flushed face. Matt looked away as Shellie lifted the comforter over my exposed skin.
“God Brooke. What the hell happened to you?” I wimpered a moan and pulled myself from her grip. Strands of hair were plastered against my slick face, I had been asleep in my own puddle of sweat. <i>Asleep!? Gabriel! Are you still here?</i> Shellie noticed my panic and pulled me to her chest. Tears streamed down my cheeks suddenly, taking me aback.
“Matt, could you wait in the hall?” Brooke whispered as she stroked my hair. “Brooke, were you thinking about him again? Oh sweetie…”
She held me and allowed me to sob for what seemed like a lifetime.
“Hun, I know it must be hard.” <i>What?</i> “You need to let him go Brooke.” <i>Who?</i> “Come on sweetie, let us treat you to lunch. We’ll skip eighth and take a packed picnic to the bay.”

Sure, I was dressed and out in the sun with Shellie and Matt but my heart was not there. <i>It had been so real. I know it was real. Like last time. Why was I taken from him? It had never happened that way before! Why can’t he hear me? Gabriel?</i>
“Brooke! Your juice!” She jumped to pick up the spilled cup at my knee.
“I-I’m sorry. I’m just exhausted Shel.” I swept my hand over the grass and picked up the spilled ice, placing it in the overturned cup then stood. “I’m going to go back to the dorm. Thank you for the sandwich.”
Shellie cupped her head in her hands and Matt stood abruptly as I stooped to gather my things. I shook my head at Matt and walked away from the scene, the dorm looming in the distance before me. I absentmindedly crossed the dock and wound through the throng of students bustling to class. I had never been more thankful than to see my quiet dorm, in which my bed awaited my sore body.
<i>Gabriel? I can’t feel you anymore… Where are you?</i>