A Married Horse of a Different Color...

A Married Horse of a Different Color…

Lights up on a messy and slightly dingy apartment. Books and knickknacks are scattered everywhere. Two girls are sting on the couch which has stacks of magazines piled on it. The walls have Japanamation posters and one Matrix poster on them.. It looks like a boys college apartment. The girls look very out of place. One of the girls has her very long hair down with a necklace pinned at the top of her head, the pendant hanging in the middle of her forehead. She’s talking in a very high pitched voice—her hands waving madly as she talks.

Jennifer
So Ryan tells me that if I don’t get online soon a sorcerer is going to take over Gespa!

Sara
And what is Gespa?

Jennifer
My online town I’ve created.

Sara
Right. Continue.

Jennifer
Well, I had to get to class, but I also knew I had to save Gespa so I skipped biochem and gathered with my online buds and we formed a blockade so the sorcerers couldn’t get to us!

Sara
Jen, you skipped biochem again?

Jennifer
Sara, it was an emergency!

Sara
Right. So how’s Ryan? Not contributing to the household chores I see.

Jennifer
We’ve been very busy.

Sara
Right, saving your online town.

Jennifer
Drop it Sara.

Sara
Sorry. How bout I help you clean up a bit for when Ryan gets back from his LAN party.

Jennifer
Yeah, okay.

They begin to pick stuff up, Sara obviously enjoying herself a lot more than Jennifer.

Sara
So let’s start over, how are you and Ryan doing really?

Jennifer
Marriage is weird.

Sara
That’s profound, Jen. Explain please.

Jennifer
It’s harder than I expected. You have to adjust to how the other person is used to living and them to you. I can get so (she wrings her hands trying to explain) about stupid stuff. Leaving his toothbrush in the shower kind of stuff, ya know? But then he comes home from class and we play our game on our computers together and everything is okay. (She pauses for a moment thoughtfully, then glances sideways at Sara) It’s so much more fun than dating cause of all the mad and crazy scrunkin’!

Sara
AHHHHHHH!!!! Remember how we made a vow not to talk about you and Ryan’s sex life?!

Jennifer
(giggling)
Yeah I know, just wanted to watch you squirm.

Sara
(shuddering)
Okay, new topic- glad you and Ryan are happily married. How’s Stacy? I haven’t talked to her since the wedding.

Jennifer
I dunno

Sara
What do you mean?

Jennifer
I haven’t talked to her in a while.

Sara
Oh. Did you guys have a falling out or something?
Jennifer
No. Ryan and I just don’t get out much.

Sara
Right. Why not? Wait if the answer is scrunkin’ I don’t want to hear it. Actually, lie to me so I don’t have to hear you say “nothing” and know that it means sex.

Jennifer
It isn’t cause of that. We just have fun being here by ourselves with our computers and our games.

Sara
You don’t hang out with any of your friends anymore?

Jennifer
Not really. I’m kind of sick of my college friends. I miss you guys from high school.

Sara
Oh. Well I miss you too, but I still hang out with my friends at school. Just because you miss someone doesn’t mean you have to be a hermit.

Jennifer
I’m not a hermit! I have Ryan and my online friends!

Sara
Jen! Those people aren’t real!

Jennifer
Hey! Ryan is VERY real.

Sara
Okay right, your husband is real, but those online friends of yours-

Jennifer
Are perfectly real too; they just happen to live far away.

Sara
Can you reach out and pinch them?!

Jennifer
Well no, and I probably wouldn’t even if I could-

Sara
JEN! Focus! You need to spend time with your friends.


Jennifer
Sara, back off. I spend time with Ryan and my friends in class. We can’t all be perfect like you.

Sara
I never said I was-

Jennifer
And furthermore I’m sick of you judging everything I do!

Sara
I don’t-

Jennifer
Yes you do. My apartment, my decorating sense, my fashion choices. You never give me a compliment, you just say “It’s very Jennifer.” Do you think I don’t know what that means? I know it means that you think I’m weird. And maybe I am weird, but appreciate me for who I am—not who I’m not. I don’t want to be you Sara. Have you ever sat down and thought that despite all my oddities and weirdness that I’m the one with a husband? Maybe that’s why you’re so critical. You’re jealous.

Sara
Right, I’m jealous of you and Mr. Socially Inept. Jen, I’m sorry you feel like I’ve been judging you, but that gives you NO reason to treat me like this.

Jennifer
Treat you-

Sara
Shut up okay? It’s my turn to speak. Why do you and all of our high school group seem to think that because I’m not married yet I’m jealous of all of you? You do realize that we’re only juniors in college right? I don’t WANT to be married yet. I know it’s a hard concept for you and all my other Susie Homemaker friends to realize, but I have my senior year to think about. Not to mention, my career and my post graduation plans. There isn’t room for me to take in any consideration of someonelse’s plans right now. Yes I’m a little bummed that I don’t have a boyfriend, but usually I’m okay. I’m sick of you and everyone I know being a constant reminder that I’m not with the one person I loved. I’m sick of you all rubbing it in my face that your relationships have all worked and mine was ruined by a blond freshman. So maybe I’m jealous of that, but I’m not jealous of your marriage.

Jennifer
Well it still doesn’t give you the right to be unsupportive.

Sara
It doesn’t give you the right to be insensitive.

They glare at each other for a moment and then turn away angrily. They look around the room to realize that they’ve cleaned the place up in their fury with each other. Jennifer begins to giggle and Sara soon follows. Eventually they each can hardly get a breath out.

Jennifer
We cleaned the house!

Sara
I know! Why is it so funny!?

Jennifer
I dunno!

Sara
Hey, I’m sorry I was unsupportive.

Jennifer
I’m sorry I was insensitive. Do you want me to write nasty Japanese words on Mark’s car the next time I visit you and Clair in Abilene?

Sara
No, I’d rather you wrote it on Amber’s car.

Jennifer
Blond freshman?

Sara
Indeed.

Jennifer
How bout Chili’s?

Sara
But what about Ryan?

Jennifer
He needs to realize I need to spend time with real people. You want to know a secret?

Sara
Shoot.

Jennifer
I get sick of playing computer games.


Sara
(laughing and grabbing Jen’s coat form the closet) Come on let’s get out of here.

Jennifer
Real people I can pinch—here I come!

Sara
But don’t please. Hey Jen?

Jennifer
Yeah?

Sara
I really like your necklace like that.

Lights out.