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Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/valike
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Review by val Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Great story. I got goosebumps. Maybe this could start alittle stronger by having an Asian woman shout,"(fill in an actual insult)". A white man with a bloated red face could shout or even simply laugh at him. A black child with many pigtails tied in velvet bows could scream with fear. Anger comes in as many forms as people do. Just some ideas. I hope they help. Thank you for the opportunity to read your work.
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Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/valike