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for entry "No RoomOpen in new Window.
In affiliation with What's Your Line Contest B...  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
Hello Dave's trying to catch up Author IconMail Icon. Thank you so much for entering the "Invalid ItemOpen in new Window. contest! As promised, I am here to review your entry, so let's get to it!

First Impression: Gruesome is right! Can you imagine if the dead were to walk the earth what it would look like? The carnage they would leave? The stench in the air? I mean, the absolute tummy turning horror of it all is sickening to say the least! So, answer me this - what happens when there is no more room on earth? What happens then?!*Shock2*

Second Impression: Reading different forms of poetry and learning how it came to be is something that I enjoy. Of course the traditional forms are great and easy to read but unconventional forms stretch your brain and your writing skills beyond the typical. I like that you gave us the back story to this poetry format and you also gave the format rules should any of your readers want to give this form a try. Nicely done.

Improvement Suggestions: None

Final Thoughts: Imagery in poetry is extremely important, especially in poems that have a limited line or word count. The more bang for your buck in choosing your words is optimal to get the desired effect. Sometimes, it isn't even the words you choose, but how you place them in your poem. Your poem was able to incite an emotional response and express imagery based on word choices and placement, all while educating me on an poetry form that I have not used before. Nice job.

This concludes my review. Thanks again for entering my contest and I wish you luck! Write on, read on, rate on! Taryn

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Review of Ocean's Waves.  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello The Crossing .. Author IconMail Icon! I am reviewing your poem for the Power Reviewers October Raid!

I really liked your poem. The imagery was nicely written and I could easily see what you were describing. Your poem flows well, the rhythm and rhymes of your poem, ebbed back and forth like the ocean waves of your poem. I feel that this poem is one of your better pieces. All of your stanzas compliment each other nicely.

As always, thank you so much for sharing.
Taryn
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3
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello Danial Lucas Author IconMail Icon! I am reviewing your poem for the Power Reviewers October Raid!

My initial reaction after reading your poem was "Oh that's so sad." And it was. The idea of possibly seeing someone and maybe convincing them that things can and will be different only to realize that the time has passed and you won't have the chance to make things right again. You go thru so many emotions and thoughts run thru your mind of what your expectations are, what their expectations may be and you have worked yourself up only to have the whole situation deflate like a balloon.

I liked your poem because it makes your audience visualize what is happening and makes them feel it too. Thank you so much for sharing.
Taryn
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4
Review of One Of A Kind  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with What's Your Line Contest B...  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
Thank you for participating in the "Invalid ItemOpen in new Window. contest! Because you referenced this contest in your entry, I am reviewing your poem as promised. My review is intended to be helpful and encouraging. Please accept it in the spirit it is given.*Smile*

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Prompt: "There can be only one."Highlander (1986)


First impression: Before I found "the one" for me, I spent a lot of time looking for him on the internet. I read what felt like up-teen million profiles; some with profile pics and some without. After years of perusing site after site, I soon realized that I was seeing a lot of the same faces over and over again. I began to lose hope near the end, only to choose someone that I had looked over for about ten years. TEN YEARS! Can you believe that?! This poem reminds me so much of the years I spent searching and all of the angst and irritation I felt during those times. I honestly believe that "the one" will come when they are supposed to and I definitely agree that booking the holiday will be so much more fun in the meantime. *Smile*

I liked that you did not break up your lines into stanzas. I feel that it helped with the flow of the poem, making it an easy read. This poem describes an incident that is highly relate-able to a lot of people in this day and time.


Does this poem reference the prompt?: Yes

Suggestions: None.

Final thoughts: I liked this poem. Not only is the subject matter a well known topic, but the emotion is relayed in a way that even those who have not had this experience can understand.

This concludes my review. Thank you for allowing me the pleasure of reading and reviewing your work and for participating in my contest. I wish you continued success with your writing and in life. Good luck in the contest! Write on, read on, rate on!~ Taryn

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by A Guest Visitor

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5
5
Review of Escapism  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with What's Your Line Contest B...  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Thank you for participating in the What's Your Line Contest! Because you referenced my contest in your entry, I am here to review your entry as promised. My review is intended to be helpful and encouraging. Please accept it in the spirit it is given.*Smile*

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Prompt:"Don't you understand? When you give up your dream, you die."
Flashdance (1983)


First impression: Wow. My exact first word after reading this story. I loved the soft imagery that started this story. Vividly painted, it is the heart and foundation of this story. I had no idea if or even how the story was to turn, but when it did, it was such a sharp turn that at first I was not quite sure where the softness had gone. I thought that the idea that the main character would literally die if he gave up his soft dream was genius. The short roller coaster of emotion with this short was also awesome. The entire format of this story is what polished it off for me. It started out soft and clean and ended the same way. For me this short gives me the same feeling that a poem with the same aesthetic would.


Does this story reference the prompt?: Yes

Suggestions: None. I feel that this short is polished and complete.

Final thoughts:This story takes you on a short trip to a place where your dreams could save your life. This story is unpredictable and a joy to read.


This concludes my review. Thank you for participating in my contest and for allowing me the pleasure of reading and reviewing your work. I wish you continued success with your writing and in life. Good luck with the contest! Write on, read on, rate on!~ Taryn

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by A Guest Visitor

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!Open in new Window..
6
6
In affiliation with What's Your Line Contest B...  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
Thank you for participating in the "Invalid ItemOpen in new Window. contest! Because you referenced this contest in your entry, I am reviewing your poem as promised. My review is intended to be helpful and encouraging. Please accept it in the spirit it is given.*Smile*

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Prompt:"There can be only one."Highlander (1986)


First impression: A light poem that reminds me of many moments poring over my latest poem, trying to conjure up the perfect word to complete my piece. Writing and rewriting until I found that one perfect word that finished off my vision of what my poem was supposed to be. I like that this poem describes the downfall of choosing the wrong word. Choosing the wrong word can not only diminish your piece, but can also change what the author is trying to portray completely.

Does this poem reference the prompt?: Yes

Suggestions: None.

Final thoughts: This is a poem that every writer can relate to and can understand. Nicely written. Short and sweet.

This concludes my review. Thank you for allowing me the pleasure of reading and reviewing your work and for participating in my contest. I wish you continued success with your writing and in life. Good luck in the contest! Write on, read on, rate on!~ Taryn

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by A Guest Visitor

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!Open in new Window..
7
7
In affiliation with What's Your Line Contest B...  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Thank you for participating in the "Invalid ItemOpen in new Window. contest! I am reviewing your poem as promised. My review is intended to be helpful and encouraging. Please accept it in the spirit it is given.*Smile*

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Prompt:"We seem to be made to suffer. It's our lot in life." ~Star Wars (1977)


First impression: First thing I noticed was that this poem was written on my birthday, which made it an extra treat for me. *Smile* This poem is fun to read, especially out loud. The peppy and upbeat meter is controlled by the easy flow that naturally takes over. The scenes that you created come alive and allows your readers to see what the life of a robot is really like. Highlighting the social mishaps that robots experience (trash can jokes) brought more of the human element to the description of a robots life for me.

Favorite Stanza: It is hard to pick a favorite stanza so I decided on two.

Poor '3PO has lost his head
and body fell apart,
Then R2D2 dragged like lead
his head to body part.

He kicks his friend and hurts his toe,
He's angry and he's smart,
He walks away and doesn't know
the "trash can" stories start.

Why: It reminds me of how a lot of us have felt at one time or another ....a mess, clumsy and falling a part. This part of your poem really brought to my mind that maybe robots are not that robotic at all...or at least are more human than they appear.


Does this poem reference the prompt?: Yes

Suggestions: None

Final thoughts: This poem is masterfully written with a meter that is easy to follow and keep, allowing the reader to focus on the imagery that is expertly painted. A really entertaining polished piece.

This concludes my review. Thank you for allowing me the pleasure of reading and reviewing your work and for participating in my contest. I wish you continued success with your writing and in life. Good luck in the contest! Write on, read on, rate on!~ Taryn

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by A Guest Visitor

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!Open in new Window..
8
8
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
Hello Prosperous Snow celebrating Author IconMail Icon! I am reading and reviewing your poem because it is listed as one of the poems in the "Invalid ItemOpen in new Window.. I am no stranger to your work so I have no doubt that I will be entertained. *Smile*

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This poem brought back so many memories for me because I also grew up in Oklahoma. I now live in Texas where we are also experiencing triple digit heat. So many times I have longed for the slower way of life that Oklahoma promotes. I also tend to think more of the cool country evenings watching the sun set over fields of grass with nothing else seen for miles, instead of the F5 tornadoes or the destructive thunderstorms that came around every year. I loved the imagery in this poem because it not only allows your readers to visualize the differences of Vegas and Oklahoma but it also allows them to feel the differences because of your expert word choices. I also liked how you described the differences in the two places by making the dividing line more distinct by emphasizing when you lived where. I thought this poem was well written and a joy to read.

I didn't see anything that I thought needed a second look.

This concludes my review. I want to thank you for not only allowing me the pleasure of reading and reviewing your work but also for reminding me of my own childhood. I wish you continued success with your writing and in life. Write on, read on, rate on! Taryn


Check out
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by A Guest Visitor
. New round already in session!


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9
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Review of When It Mattered  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
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This review is coming to you courtesy of the WDC Power Reviewers Powerful Heart Review Raid! My review is intended to be helpfu and encouraging. Please accept it in the spirit it is given

Title: "When It MatteredOpen in new Window.



First impression: A beautiful tribute to the owner of your heart. Each stanza has a very even cadence that easily maintained by your readers and allows us to concentrate more on the feeling your words make us experience. The thankful heart is evident through out this poem but ends on a sad note. They were there and then gone. The emptiness ithat their abscense leaves is heavy and deeply portrade to your readers. My impression is that their abscense was probably not of their doing because I am sure if they knew of the depth of love you have for them...they would have never left. I felt that this peice was well written and flowed very easily.

What I think needs a second look: Nothing. I feel that this poem is polished and complete.

My favorite part:


Suddenly you were gone,
You disappeared without a trace,
You left me shivering in the cold,
My soul adrift in time and space.


Final thoughts: I really liked this poem. I thought it was well written and achieves what most poets want to accomplish, and that is to touch their readers in a way that makes them involve most if not all of their senses. A job well done.

This concludes my review. Thank you for allowing me the pleasure of reading and reviewing your work. I enjoyed the read. I wish you continued success with your writing and in life. Write on, read on, rate on! Taryn



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!Open in new Window..
10
10
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
*ConfettiR**ConfettiV**ConfettiR**ConfettiV**ConfettiR**ConfettiR**ConfettiV**ConfettiV**ConfettiR**ConfettiV**ConfettiR**ConfettiV**ConfettiR**ConfettiV**ConfettiR**ConfettiV**ConfettiR**ConfettiV**ConfettiV**ConfettiR**ConfettiV**ConfettiR**ConfettiR**ConfettiV**ConfettiV**ConfettiR**ConfettiV**ConfettiR*
*Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart*


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*Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart*


This review is coming to you courtesy of the WDC Power Reviewers Powerful Heart Review Raid! My review is intended to be helpful and encouraging. Please accept it in the spirit it is given




First impression: A nicely written comedic poem that is relatable, full of imagery and easy to read. This poem allows its' readers to reminisce about their own potlucks and the humerous pitfalls they can bring. You know the stories behind the food, what food to pretend to like even though you know it leaves something to be desired. No matter the reason for the gathering, the food alone brings the family together and allows the comraderie and sense of family to make the gathering that much more special. The rhyming element of this poem was also well done. I didn't have any problems maintaining the rhythm.


What I think needs a second look: Nothing. I thought this was a nicely written poem that was a fun to read.

My favorite part: It was very hard to choose my favorite stanza. So, I decided to choose two.

Cousin Mary, she made the gravy,
Her specialty from the Navy,
Was blue like the ocean,
Her own secret potion,
When stirred, it was quite wavy.

and

And I provided the bread,
It baked while I was in bed,
Okay, it wasn’t homemade,
To get it, I dearly paid,
The baker, I'd have to wed.


Final thoughts: I really enjoyed this poem. It brought back many memories for me. I loved the format and felt that the rhyme scheme chosen served this poem very well.

This concludes my review. Thank you for allowing me the pleasure of reading and reviewing your work. I enjoyed the read. I wish you continued success with your writing and in life. Write on, read on, rate on! Taryn



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!Open in new Window..
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Review of Love's Journey  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
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*Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart*


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*Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart*


This review is coming to you courtesy of the WDC Power Reviewers Powerful Heart Review Raid! My review is intended to be helpfu and encouraging. Please accept it in the spirit it is given

Title:"Love's JourneyOpen in new Window.



First impression: A poem that I relate to completely. Love feels so elusive when you are alone and still searching for someone. But when you have finally found the one that God made for you, love can be so thick and somewhat overwhelming; but light and free at the same time. Love has a way of making your heart feel so full that it feels like it will burst from trying to contain all the love you feel. The level of gratitude that is felt is beyond compare. I thought your poem was a fabulous example of this and beautifully written.

What I think needs a second look: Nothing. I thought your poem was nicely written and complete

My favorite part:

Fate really happens
we know that is true
God gave me a gift
Thankfully it's you


Final thoughts: Beautifully written poem that expresses the gratefullness of having found love and the joy that is felt.

This concludes my review. Thank you for allowing me the pleasure of reading and reviewing your work. I enjoyed the read. I wish you continued success with your writing and in life. Write on, read on, rate on! Taryn



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12
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Review of Thank You WDC  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
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*Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart*


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*Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart**Heart*


This review is coming to you courtesy of the WDC Power Reviewers Powerful Heart Review Raid! My review is intended to be helpfu and encouraging. Please accept it in the spirit it is given

Title:"Thank You WDCOpen in new Window.



First impression: Super cute poem that expresses the happiness that is felt by the author not just in words but in appearance. I can and do relate to this poem because I feel the same way. The WDC has been a part of my life for the last five years now and I have never regretted joining. I thought this poem was colorful and fun to read.

What I think needs a second look: Nothing. I thought this poem was bright fun and joyful

My favorite part:

Yippie Yippie I found a new home
Somewhere I can be free to roam

Final thoughts: A joyful poem that is bright, full of color and fun.

This concludes my review. Thank you for allowing me the pleasure of reading and reviewing your work. I enjoyed the read. I wish you continued success with your writing and in life. Write on, read on, rate on! Taryn



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13
13
Review of "Lovenesses"  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello, it's me again with review number three....we are moving right along. With this review, I decided to do something a little different and write my first thoughts as I thought them. Let's see what happens. *Smile*

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Lovers enjoy moonlight play on ocean waves
Whispered secrets, a promised fixed gaze
Love blossoms with each turn of the tide
A future before them as big as the ocean wide.


The imagery of this piece is very beautiful and I almost felt like I was peeping into a private moment of two lovers on the beach.The flow of this piece is very nice and easy, allowing the sweetness and the beauty of the piece take center stage. I also felt like this piece had little gems in each stanza. For me, this poem speaks about more than young love...but the maturing of love. Although the poem does not officially say that the love starts young...but by the fourth stanza...you speak of aging love. I like you how glide through the seasons of love and mention fleeting melodies, which for me stands for fleeting moments. My favorite part being "Youthful love knowing Summer's breath...which for me means that the Winter of love is approaching. Very nicely written.

I didn't see anything that I thought needed a second look. Another well written peice of work.

This concludes review number three. Rockin' and rollin'right along. From the work I have reviewed so far, I can say that you have poetry in your blood! Keep up the great work! Write on, read on, rate on! Taryn
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14
14
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello again! I'm back with review number two! Now that you have set the bar...I am anxious to see if you have met your previous standard.*Smile* I'm sure that you have...but the suspense is killing me! On to the review!

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Well, this was a really short and sweet poem; but packed full of aromatic imagery that took me back home. It's amazing how it is the little things that you remember most when you get older. The smell of grandma's bread, mama's dressing, a whiff of a pipe that smells like papa's. You're poem reminds me of how blessed we really are to have such memories. I know that there are many in the world today who do not and I really feel sorry for them. What I loved about this poem was the immediate recollection of my own memories of my own grandma who is now dead. If only I had known then how short life really is, I think I may have taken it a little slower. Thank you for reminding me of All my blessings and not just the ones I see today. *Smile*

I didn't see anything that I thought needed a second look. Another fantastic poem.

This concludes review number two! Wow...I told you I drew the long end of the stick! I am really enjoying your work and I look forward to the next one. Unfortunately, I will have to continue tomorrow, but I'm one of those folkes who like to savor their food. I have never been one to gobble everything up all at once. So... until tomorrow...write on, read on, rate on! Taryn


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Review of Siren song  Open in new Window.
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Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hello michaelk2 Author IconMail Icon! I found your review request on the "SuperTower Review Room MB RewardsOpen in new Window. and I thought I would check it out. I hope my review finds you in hopeful and energized spirits for the new year. My review is intended to be helpful and encouraging. Please accept it in the spirit it is given.*Smile*

What a sad story! I don't know what I waas expecting, but ...what a sad story. I thought you did a fantastic job of drawing your reader into your story. For less than five hundred words, this story runs your readers through several emotions and does it in such a way that we (your readers) do not get bored waiting for something to happen. I thought that your story was very entertaining, easy to follow and interesting. I also felt that this was an original. Sirens have been written about for centuries...but I can't recall reading about a siren that was a child. The very last paragraph was an awesome touch to this story. You could have stopped where the siren begins to sing again...but you gave us a little bit more...and it's takes your breath away. Very nice job. This story is well written and a nice read.


I didn't see anything that I thought needed a second look. I thought that your story was well written and polished.

This concludes my review. Thank you so much for allowing me the pleasure of reading and reviewing your work. I really enjoyed the read. Thank you so much for sharing and I wish you continued success with your writing and in life. Write on, read on, rate on! Taryn

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by A Guest Visitor

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16
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In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello Persk Author IconMail Icon! I came across your essay on the Hub page. The title was something that I could relate to so I thought I would give it a read.

I have to say that I whole heartedly agree with everything you stated. I too love romance and also read a bushel load of Harlequin romances. When I was younger they were called trash novels. Now days...those novels would be considered g-rated if given a rating at all. However, I do miss the character developement in those books along with plots that would have you in tears by the middle of the book. After Harlequin, I became hooked on Sandra Brown and Diana Palmaer and a few others. Unfortunately, now days it is very hard to find any romance novels with depth. I have found a few on Wattpad, but just like Amazon...you have to waddle through some that are trash.The good thing about Wattpad is that you don't have to purchase anything to read it. So, maybe if you haven't already, Wattpad might be worth checking out. For me, I like culterally diverse novels. And there really isn't a lot of romance novels written in that genre. I even considered writing my own, because I figure that I couldn't do any worse than what is out there. I'm still working on it *Laugh*. Anywho...don't give up the search. I know that there has to be an author with a book worth delving into somewhere.*Smile*

Happy hunting and good luck!~Taryn


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Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello Moarzjasac Author IconMail Icon! I have come to check out your poem as you suggested and as always I was not disappointed.*Smile*

In my email to you, I asked for a picture of you jewelry that you spoke of, not knowing that you had provided a picture already...with this poem. Absolutely beautiful. The imagery in this piece was expertly written. Each line sparkles and compliments the next. The imagery set the slow, melodic pace of the piece and allowed me to enjoy the scenery as it was. The feeling of peace and hope was heavily felt while reading this poem and I must say...made me wish I had your talent for writing. I really enjoyed the experience of reading this poem and I thank you for honoring me by allowing me to read it.

As you can tell, I have no issues with this poem. For me, the imagery is the star of this piece. It is polished and expertly written.

Again, thank you for the experience. As always, your writing does not disappoint and I look forward to reading more of your work. Write on, read on, rate on! Taryn

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Review of Milks and Oils  Open in new Window.
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Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Hello katwoman45 Author IconMail Icon! I found your poem through the read and review option on the side panel. In case I have not reviewed any of your work before, let me say that my review is intended to be helpful and encouraging. Any opinion I may give that you do not agree with, please feel free to file it away in file thirteen. No hard feelings. *Smile*I hope you can accept my review in the spirit it is given.

I really enjoyed reading your poem. I thought that merging the aspects of the relationship and cooking was genius. Many times we have heard that the kitchen is the heart of the home and your poem gave us a good example as to why that fact is true. The fact that you cannot change another person was also eluded to in your poem and is a truth that many of us have had to be told many times over because sometimes it just doesn't sink in. In your poem, not only did your subject finally come to terms with that but they also realized that the strings holding the relationship together were only as strong as the consistency of the stirring. And once the stirring stopped, the bonds that held them together became weak and eventually fell apart. The metaphors and symbolism in your piece were easy to grasp and made reading this poem a joy. I thought that the imagery in your piece was painted well and that your word choices were expertly used in providing an insight into the feelings you depicted. The cadence of your poem, although not conventional, was easy to maintain. I also feel that your piece leaves your reader would food for thought and a good peice of meat to chew on. *Smile* Again, I really enjoyed your poem. I thought it was really written well.

I didn't see anything that I thought needed a second look. I feel that your poem is complete and polished.

This concludes my review. I really enjoyed the read and I want to thank you for allowing me the pleasure of reading and reviewing your work. I wish you continued success with your writing and in life. Write on, read on, rate on! Taryn


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Review of The Lying Game  Open in new Window.
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Rated: E | (2.5)
Hello tamikafinley Author IconMail Icon. I found your piece on the newbie page and I thought I would check it out. I see that you are new to WDC and I want to welcome to our cozy community.I have learned a lot and have really enjoyed my time here and I have no doubt that you will do the same.*Smile*Before I begin, let me say that my review is intended to be helpful and encouraging. If there is an opinion that you do not agree with, please feel free to file it away in file thirteen...no hard feelings. *Smile* Please accept my review in the spirit it is given.

I found your piece interesting, not so much because of the subject matter, but more because of the way you wrote about it. Your piece is entertaining and it has moments of comedy. It does leave your reader with food for thought if they have not posed the question of what makes a lie to themselves before. Your peice is very conversative and interactive, which I thought was a plus.

What I thought needed a second look were several things. The first being that I don't see this as poetry but more prose.
Prose (prōz)noun: written or spoken language in its ordinary form, without metrical structure.
In the first paragraph, first line, there should either be a comma after "acceptable", or ..."or" should capitalized. Second line, I think that you meant for woe to be foe.
In the third paragraph, third line, "do" should be "does" and "say" should be "says".
In the last paragraph, when writing with numbers...it is customary to write the number out (ex. 3 would be three). In the second line, "hes" should be "he's". In the third line, "don't" should be "doesn't".

I feel that with some editing and a clearer vision of what you want your piece to be, your item could be really good.

This concludes my review. I appreciate opportunity of allowing me the pleasure of reading and reviewing your work. I really enjoyed it. I want to welcome you again to the WDC. I wish you continued success with your writing and in life. Write on, read on, rate on! Taryn

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Review of New World  Open in new Window.
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Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hello beamer Author IconMail Icon! I found your review request on the "Review Me List for WDC Power -ON HIATUSOpen in new Window. and I thought I would check it out. *Smile* First let me say that my review is intended to be helpful and encouraging. It is just my opinion and any points I may make are just that...opinions, and you know what they say about opinions. *Wink* Please accept my review in the spirit is is given.

I really liked your story. I found it to be very entertaining and exciting. Your story is very easy to follow and engaging. This is only the beginning of your story and it is already action packed; it speaks well of what is in store for the rest of your story. *Smile* I loved how you began the story and you definitely ended this portion of the story with your reader wanting to know more. The imagery was written very well. It wasn't so heavy as to overload your story but was just enough to allow your reader some liberties of using their own imagination. The overall description of your agent, I felt was quite good in that he is nondescript and was a stickler for protocol...just what you would expect from an agent. Your story has the potential to be really great. I feel that if you continue on the path that you are on...you could finish with a really strong polished story. I did not want it to end.

I didn't see anything that I thought needed a second look. I thought that this portion of your story was really written well.

This concludes my review. Thank you for allowing me the pleasure of reading and reviewing your work. I really enjoyed the read. I hope you enjoyed my review. I wish you continued success with your writing and in life. Write on, read on, rate on! Taryn

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Review of October  Open in new Window.
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Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)
Hello again! Is it already time for review number four!? Looks like we are moving right along.*Smile*

I chose this poem because October is almost here. I am a Summer girl all the way...but Fall has something special too. It has all the things you mentioned in your poem. The colors, the chill, and the anticipation of the coming holidays. October really is when the magic starts to begin. Your poem brought a lot of memories to mind. I thought the imagery was written well in your poem. I could feel and smell the crisp fresh air and see all the decorated pumpkins. I enjoyed this poem a lot.

I didn't see anything that I thought needed a second look. I thought your poem was colorful and fun.

This concludes review number four. I hope you are enjoying these reviews as much as I am enjoying reading and reviewing your work. See you at the next one! Write on, read on, rate on! Taryn

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Review of The gift  Open in new Window.
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Rated: E | (5.0)
*Sad* Well, it looks like this is it...my final review gifted to you by Aaron for the winning bid in the WDC Power Reviewers dress auction. It has really been a lot of fun stopping by, I really hope you have enjoyed it also.

As I am sure you have noticed, that even though you have a variety of items in your port...I have chosen to review poetry only. There is a reason for this. I love stores, however, I do not feel very confident in reviewing stories. Poetry is my first love and my port is mainly poetry. I also chose the items that I did because they did not have a lot of reviews. I always go for those first. *Smile*Anywho...now that is over...on to my final review.

I am glad I chose this poem for my last review because I don't think I could have had the mental energy to read any more after this one. So sad, but what a gift! I thought you did a really good job in setting the scene for this piece. I also thought the imagery was very nice. I read this and imagined that this was taking place at just before dusk...the scenes were written with a really soft hand. Very nice.

I didn't see anything that needed a second look. As like the other pieces, I thought this poem was polished and written well.

This concludes my fifth review and your package for the dress auction is now complete. Thank you so much for the pleasure of reading and reviewing your work. I have really enjoyed the experience. I wish you continued success with your writing and in life. Write on, read on, rate on! Taryn

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Review of Found Treasure  Open in new Window.
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Rated: E | (4.5)
Here I am again with the fourth review. My stop by your port has really been a treat. *Smile*

I consider inspiration to be the holy grail for writers. When we are inspired, we can write until there is smoke coming from our fingers. *Laugh* It is such a wonderful feeling that is hard to describe. Whenever we are hit with writer's block and our inspiration has diminished, it can feel like a death. The next best thing to being inspired is having someone support you, have your back, give you that boost to push your inspired work forward. I felt that this piece did a wonderful job of describing the value of having such a person in your life. Sometimes that little push or vote of confidence is all we need to realize our potential. This poem is a wonderful tribute to the person who has given you the push you needed.

I didn't see anything that I thought needed a second look. I thought this poem was beautifully written.

This concludes review number four. It has really been a joy visiting your port. I hope you have enjoyed my visit as much as I have. Write on read on, rate on! Taryn

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Review of Can You See Me?  Open in new Window.
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Rated: E | (4.0)
Hello Lynda! It is time for the third review, gifted to you by Aaron for the winning bid in our dress auction. I am enjoying my little jaunt through your port. *Smile*

I feel that this poem is one that everyone and anyone can relate to. The need to be seen, heard and felt is a basic need that we all crave...starting from birth. When we are not heard, felt, or seen, the feeling of being invisible is suffocating. Our only recourse is to beg for visibility. I thought your poem depicted this very feeling quite well. There is no doubt by everyone who reads this poem, how desperate the feeling of being invisible feels.

I did not see anything that needed a second look. I thought your poem was well written.

This concludes review number three. Thank you for allowing me the pleasure of reading and reviewing your work. I hope you have enjoyed my reviews. On to review number four! Write on, read on, rate on! Taryn

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Review of Sounds of youths  Open in new Window.
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Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello Lynda, I am back again with another review! I hope you are well and blessed.

Immediately while reading your poem, I was reminded by my own childhood. I still hear my father yelling at us to not slam the front door as we ran out. I remember playing in the street with my friends, playing every kind of ball imaginable,riding our bikes and jumping off while they were still moving. The joys of being a kid...such freedom! I like this poem. It brought back so many great memories for me. I thought you poem described the carefree life that childhood should be. Just as your previous poem that I reviewed, this poem is also joyful and fun. The format you chose is again, a great choice for this poem. I felt that this poem was also a well written piece of work.

I didn't see anything that needed a second look in this poem either. I thought it was polished and a fun read.

This concludes my review. Thank you for the pleasure of reading and reviewing your work. I look forward to the next one! Write on, read on, rate on! Taryn

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