I came across your story "One Way", and couldn't help giving you my feedback. The story is an intriguing combination of suspense, comedy, and fantasy. I thoroughly enjoyed reading it, and although the plot was somewhat predictable, it was quirky and fun to read. I couldn't catch any obvious grammar/syntax errors, and other than a few places where a bit of rewording is necessary, it was a great story!
I came across your poem and was intrigued from the start. It's one of the most unique poems I've read in a while, and I thoroughly enjoyed it!
Overall, the poem flows smoothly, the rhyme scheme is consistent, and the way the poem brings the Fates to life is clever, so hats off to you! Other than a couple of syntax errors, I couldn't find any major issues to be corrected.
Hats off to you for writing such a neat poem! I love that you took the time to appreciate the everyday heroes we are all grateful for in our lives. Your poem flows beautifully, and I enjoyed reading it through and through!
As a side note, I can see the statue of Balto from my bedroom window, and I smiled when I saw you used it in your poem.
I've just read Enchanted Tales, and I would like to share with you a few of my thoughts about it.
First of all, the story is good in that it grips you. It made me as a reader want to read more, which is something that authors strive to do, so well done. Also, the way that the name of the store is Enchanted Tales, ties in with the plot of casting magic spells on Martha's father, and that makes the story cohesive.
My biggest suggestion for improvement would be to change the tone of the story. As of now, it is written in a very informal voice, and it makes the story seem unprofessional. Instead, address the readers seriously, and don't make it seem like you are talking to us, like in, "Sirens wail. No way!"
I hope you've found my suggestions helpful, and that you will incorporate some of them into your story.
I've read your piece and I have a few things to say about it.
Firstly, I really liked the flow of the piece. I also liked the theme a lot, especially the parts about an empty space never being filled.
One thing, though is that when you say about icicles forming on her face, i think that sounds too technical and breaks the flow a little. Try rewording a bit there and see if it helps.
It just made me feel sad, in general, but that's what the aim is. It's a good thing..really, for this types of pieces in writing.
It also made me happy to know that there is good writing like this and good writers like you out there.
I have a few things to say about your poem...
First of all, it is very unique and it conveys a clear voice that is random and informal, yet polite and simple in its own way. The randomness of the topic itself and where IOU chose to go with it is actually respectable.
There are a few grammatical errors though... But fix those and you'll be on your way.
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