Writer's block, speaking to yourself, and the final epiphany of an idea that sets us off into overdrive - we've all dealt with it to some extent, and yet I didn't find reading this mundane. Finding one's own writing style, whatever that may be, is the hardest thing to work out, because it does not manifest itself when we're looking for it. You've expressed this idea; or lack of ideas, rather; well enough in this piece...
Speaking of music - check out the song Weight by the band Isis - it takes nearly four minutes to get started, and goes on a lulling, progressive pathway, until it ends - kinda like this piece of writing... Or so I think...
Good stuff, lots of luck on writing a whole lot more...
I'm not sure this is auto-biographical, but it certainly sounds like it.
This story could easily fit into any narrative from the hippie era; but it does seem to address what exactly makes a creative artist click. Either it's neverending passion, or being a stickler for quality, or narrowing down the only kinds of artists, as is done here. The line "I will discuss how my lack of self confidence manifests itself in harsh judgement towards other" - explains much of artistic criticism. In many ways, the true way to know how much of an artist one is, is to encourage people with faults in their work - if not, art isn't exactly appeciated, the objective is to get more famous than the other artist. WHich sort of defeats the purpose of being creative - just my view...
You might want to put in spaces between paragraphs, because it looks messy. This is an interesting piece, I would hate to have this piece get missed out, because it looks the way it does. Just a suggestion...
To be honest, I would've enjoyed this piece a whole lot more if there were more instances of flashbacks, but this piece does have a certain charm in it's narrative that I wouldn't want changed. I almost expected the old man to still be a Nazi sympathizer, and the narrative does build up considerably well to suggest it till the very end. It's a piece that almost reaches a poignant quality about it at the end.
Your writing's amazingly descriptive - for once, I can't pinpoint a specific style of writing, and am considerably pleased by that. At times, it reads like a demented diary entry told in the third-person, and at times, it almost reads like the autobiography of a manic depressive. It's interesting how you've used the importance of writing for the character be the sole premise for this piece, yet managed be so imaginative with it.
I'm not sure, but this piece does seem like a bunch of individual philosophical and psychological rants combined together.
Impressive - lots of luck on writing a whole lot more...
Good writing - especially Neil's character sketch...
I began this reading this piece thinking of it as an absurdist piece, but I was pleasantly surprised at the end of each little eccentricity till the end.
The dialogues in this piece are excellent, in one way, I think it's what makes this piece so enjoyable to read. The narrative is pretty much detached to not offer any opinion of Neil's character or behavior, which does make the story even funnier. The line between genius and madness is pretty thin indeed, and you've illustrated it here pretty well. It's interesting how Kate is the voice of reason in the story, yet acknowledges Neil's slightly philosophical view-point at the end.
It's been a terrific read, lots of luck on writing a whole lot more...
You've managed to capture the essense of wariness and disbelief with which most of society views careers in creative arts. And succeeded in doing so, with a considerably short piece of prose.
I'm not sure if the last two lines are quotes by someone else, because I think I remember reading something vaguely similar to it someplace. Good way to end it though...
You certainly have something to say with this poem. And it is a subject of vital importance, if the statistics of obeisity, heart diesease, and diabetes the world over are any indication...
Having siad that, you might just make this piece an important read if you write an article on this subject. At the outset, this piece reads pretty much like some nonsensical poem posted on walls of fat camps to make light of the situation. I appreciate the effort you took into making this piece into a light, entertaining read, but perhaps you could either exapnd on the the writing (make it a longer poem), or change the way it's written (article) - just a suggestion...
I probably liked this essay/article probably because there are things mentioned here which I probably do unconsciously, when I write anything... These are probably a few ways you could come up with an idea, but the idea about the origin of ideas was interesting and thoughtful to indulge in, so good work there...
However, it's an article which could've been more interesting if you expanded on the points a tad bit more. For example, the nonsensical poems were ones where you could provide your own examples. You're right that this article barely touched the surface, so I'm looking forward to some good reading material of your own devising.
The idea that the conscience is almost like a different entity altogether warrants some looking into I suppose. Especially when most of us do the exact opposite of what this inner voice tells us to do, most of the time anyway.
I'm aware this is a monologue, but since the subject is philosophical, I wish you'd write an article on this topic. You've certainly laid the groundwork for it here...
It's strange how young people look at glitz and glamour today, which is all they're seeing. The reason there's so much advertising today is because most things in entertainment are sub-standard, or at least not very original. A 100 years ago, role models were statesmen, writers, scientists, philosphers - people who'd achieved something substantial. Now it's celebrities. Either as a record of experience, or just as an article detailing the collapse of sensibilities, this piece needs to be longer.
It is pethaps the case that criticism in any choice of creative careerism is scathing and discouraging as you've mentioned here. The only possible responde to it, is to be as scathing in mental perspective and the work that's produced creatively.
i enjoyed this piece, for the views expressed in it. I suppose it's safe to assume every writer, or anyone dealing with anything creative has to deal with parallels liike the ones you've mentioned here. This story is perhaps more of an article than a story, subjectively.
It's strange how something as simplistically bureaucratic as a restraining order could shift the sentiment of eagerness or longing to be with one's own, could be turned into the behavior exhibited by a stalker. I say this, simply because I initially thought that this was the story of a stalker.
I suppose I did guess the gist of the story early on, but it did provide some enjoyable reading. And that was a good choice to not reveal a lot about the narrator's past in here, it would've taken away a bit from the sympathy a reader would feel for him as a whole. Good work.
The initial idea was fresh - I've heard of people taking drastic steps to get attention and appreciation, but this was surprising enough.
The interactions between the cop and the attention-seeker were cleverely-worded, yet sybtle, which seemed to have a certain charm about it.
The reverse-psychology thing wasn't entirely original, or something I hadn't seen before the end, but it fit with the flow of the story.
good writing, and lots of luck on writing a whole lot more...
I suppose there's some truth to what you've expressed in this poem. We seldom allow ourselves to appreciate the things that are readily available to us, and in plenty. In the same sense, I suppose that's why we find people who enjoy, for instance, classical music, latch on to it so tightly, because things like those are far and few...
I loved the metaphors you've used in this poem, and managing to rhyme it is an added bonus...
Equally disparaging and demented, the narrative seems to teeter on split personality and pure psychosis. I enjoyed the internal dialogue thoroughly, because it adhered to all those elements that are required for this genre of writing, and more importantly, gave credence to the thoughts and actions of the narrator.
A rivetting read, but I really do think you should develop this into something bigger, it definitely has the scope for it... A murder mystery novel, perhaps - just a suggestion...
I enjoyed reading this story immensely - on multiple accounts.
It interested me slightly, that a story about a post-apartheid Africa, still had some essential remnants of apartheid, in displaced, random places. And this idea seems to connect with most third-world, or developing countries in the world; where there is Development in selective, expensive bursts, while the rest of the coiuntry in most cases suffer or are forced into mandatory poverty, ignorance and squalor.
The end to this story was heart-warming and simply touching, to say the least.
Loved it... Lots of luck on writing a whole lot more...
I do like the viewpoints that are expressed here, and the way with which you used aliens to express those views... But perhaps, this would've been more sarcastically funny if this was a short-story; just a thought... This piece has some very strong cynical humor, intentionally or otherwise, which is why I suggested a story fromat for this piece...
This piece gives the reader an inclination of how sick the father in this story's feeling, just by the description. The narrative stays consistently sickening till the very end, very much like the narrator's mind-set in the story, and we almost breathe a sigh of relief at the end of the story...
Good writing, and perhaps one of those things writers, or anyone else delving into anything creative should consider...
Writing's not about how good or otherwise a writer is, it's about the the thought and effort that goes into pure expression... And for reasons that are fairly obvious, perhaps you should expand this piece into an article... It isn't about giving false hopes to writers, it's about encouragement in the face of an indifferent, discouraging world...
I admire the sentiment you've expressed in this piece, lots of luck on writing a whole lot more....
This piece of writing does capture the innocence and infantile wisdom that's as much a part of childhood as insatiable curiosity and an obsessed craving for sweet things.
Not a bad narrative piece for this style of writing, Lots of luck on writing a whole lot more...
This piece has got some really intense, interesting imagery in it, which I suppose cannot be described in vivid detail in poem format... Try writing this like a long monologue, or like describing a scene in a movie - just a suggestion... I'n just not sure if this works as a poem...
The dialogues were well-placed, not to mention reflected the attitude of soldiers brilliantly... What I meant by that - soldiers are trained on the importance of monotonous routines and hierarchies, and then the absurdity of facing the worst inhumane situations thrown in the mix renders them almost entirely emotionless drones. And yet, there might the last sparks/vestiges of humanr concern left. This story seemed to capture that sentiment perfectly... Glad you finally published the novel...
I can't claim to have the answers to most of the questions posted in this piece, nor can I honestly say that I agree with most of the things you've said here - but still, it was well thought out, and to your credit, you have managed to write a fairly-balanced article...
Good work, and lots of luck on writing a whole lot more...
You've created an alternate history, with the change of one single premise... Writers often make a truckload of mistakes with this sort of topic, but you seemed to have covered most of the points, and pinpointed the important the criteria, to make this small " what-if" short story interesting and precise...
If you're interested in this genre of writing, I'd suggest reading Making History by Stephen Fry...
Equally despondent, world-weary and wise, this poem seems to skip through a multitude of emotions and deep inner-thoughts; as rapidly as the description of a panic attack, or a schizophrenic fit... Excellent work...
Lots of luck on writing a whole lot more...
Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/ronjsquared
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.09 seconds at 10:44pm on Nov 21, 2024 via server WEBX1.
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
