This poem was suspenseful and sensual, and yet it felt like a cool night that brings freedom. I love all the feelings you combined in this poem. The way you wound the hot suspense was lovely, in the middle I read it out loud, slowly. It felt awesome!
This poem is so good! It's so beautiful and reminded me that together us humans can form marvelous things. Alone, I often feel useless, powerless to form anything worth anyone's time. But with the help of others like me, we could create beautiful things worth someone's time. Thank you for writing this beautiful reminder that we're all worth something!
I really enjoyed this poem! I love how it begins with that euphoria that comes with observing simple things, finding beauty in the plain and ordinary. And of course, that sensation is heightened when you fall in love. There is that joy of falling in love, and that deep tingling of knowing how wrong it is.
Although I'm not religious, I really liked this poem. It sounded nice and had a lot of very deep meaning. Although it mentioned "God" and "Eden" I feel that this poem could be aimed to help and inspire anyone, regardless of religious beliefs. Because we are all human beings together, we do need to come together as collective beings.
This was fun to read, I love going to public places to write. Coffee shops, parks, malls, anywhere works. This is what it feels like. I see someone and right away have a story for them, even though it's probably a tale far from reality. Being around strangers is so inspirational!
I loved how through all the tragedy, they came together to be thankful on Thanksgiving. I also like how the sad events were combined with normal preparations for a holiday meal: "Toss the salad. Her youngest boy was a social outcast." It's definitely a drama!
This poem is so cute! I would love reading this to my future children. It's so cool that even though this is a children's poem it rhymes so well, it'd get the littles used to the feel of poetry and inspire them to become poets. I can imagine illustrations for this poem would be super adorable!
This was beautiful to read! I loved all the different examples of love you included, a loving hug between grandmother and grandson, a mother's love for her child, the birth of your first child; they were all amazing! This inspired me to stop stewing over old loves and look for the new love. Perhaps I'll go buy myself a dozen roses.
This poem was written so professionally! I really enjoyed it. The theme is great, and every word flowed to create an amazing rhythm. It makes sense that you received an honorable mention, this poem is so good! I look forwards to reading more of your work.
I really enjoyed the part of this novel you have done! I would love to buy this book after it's published. During the prologue, I liked how intensely you managed to express the feelings of fear and courage. One thing I noticed that I thought was strange was this: "Their faces were pale as snow behind their helmets." That quote seemed to suggest every soldier was white, which seemed strange. I would expect to see people of all ethnicities in a huge army.
There were some nice metaphors in here, my favorite being "It felt as though a lumberjack had taken a sledgehammer to his head." It's so creative!
Overall, I thought this was well written and I can't wait until it's finished!
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