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1
1
Review of The Long Night  Open in new Window.
Review by OOT™ Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" Open in new Window.*CakeP*

First of all, happy account anniversary! I'm OOT™ Author Icon, and I'm honored to review your work.

My Thoughts: I dropped by your port for an anniversary review and was delighted to see the number of flash fiction stories you have. I love both reading and writing flash fiction, so I will most definitely make your port a freqent stop. I chose this piece, because I was intrigued by the title and the description. I was not disappointed! I really enjoyed the read.

You did a fantastic job of writing a complete and interesting story using only 300 words. I know from experience how difficult that can be, but you made it seem effortless here. You were able to adequately describe what kind of person Chester is, give a good description of the scene, and provide a conflict and a resolution. I love the way you ended the story, allowing the reader to see Sammy getting his revenge.

*Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen*

My Suggestions: I stumbled over "pulled out a flask of whisky and took a drag". When I hear "take a drag", I think of a cigarette. I even googled "take a drag of whisky" and couldn't find anything on point.

"The impact breaking of both his legs." I believe this would sound better as "the impact breaking both of his legs". Also, since that is not a complete sentence, I suggest you change the period to a comma in the previous sentence and combine the two.

A few paragraphs later, I suggest changing to "The cold wrapped itself around him."

*Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen*


Overall: Thank you for providing this little gem. I enjoyed the read and will definitely be dropping by your port again soon. I hope you have a wonderful WDC anniversary month and continue to share your talent with us!

*Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen* *Bookopen*


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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
2
2
Review of Spring  Open in new Window.
Review by OOT™ Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" Open in new Window.*CakeP*

First of all, happy account anniversary! I'm OOT™ Author Icon, and I'm honored to review your work.

My Thoughts: I dropped by your port for an anniversary review, and I chose this piece, because it was one of the few that had no ratings. I'm glad I did! I loved it! I know from experience how difficult it can be to write a complete and interesting story using 300 words or less, and you did a fantastic job here!

I enjoyed your description of the transition from winter to spring, and it was easy for me to imagine the scene that you described. I expecially loved the twist at the end. Even though I should have realized something was amiss with the mention of the dream involving the arctic hare, it still took me by complete suprise to learn the identity of the main character at the end. I love stories with a twist, and you did a great job here.

*Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl*


My Suggestions: I think the story itself is perfect as-is, but I would suggest you consider changing the story's description to give the reader a hint as to what to expect from the story. I would also suggest you add "nature" as one of the genres.

*Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl*


Overall: Thank you for sharing this little gem! I thoroughly enjoyed the read, and I will definitely be returning to your port soon! I hope you have a wonderful WDC anniversary month and that you continue to share your talent with us. Good luck in the contest!

*Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl*


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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
3
3
Review of Lost Love  Open in new Window.
Review by OOT™ Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (3.5)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" Open in new Window.*CakeP*

First of all, happy account anniversary! I'm OOT™ Author Icon, and I'm honored to review your work.

My Thoughts: I dropped by your port for an anniversary review, and the title of this piece caught my eye. I enjoyed reading it, and I'm sure most of us can relate to the hearbreak and despair that Lisa was feeling. The scene was perfect, and I could easily imagine Lisa sitting on the floor of her bedroom, mourning her lost love. The piece also made me remember being in similar situations a few times in my life.

I really liked the apparent starkness of the bedroom, and I think it was the perfect place for the story to occur. It contributed to the feelings of hopelessness and despair that Lisa was experiencing. You packed a lot of emotion into such a short piece, and even though the piece was extremely short, it was complete and interesting. Good job!

*Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl*


My Suggestions: First, I suggest you change the description to give the reader a hint as what the piece is about. Similarly, I suggest you change the genres to better reflect the piece...maybe "emotional" and "relationship". I also suggest you separate the piece into paragraphs to make an easier and more visually appealing read.

As to content, I suggest you edit to make sure you stay with one tense, in this case, past tense. While most of the story is in past tense, in the middle, you change to present ("She stare's...", "She wonder's" and then return to past tense. (Also, if you were writing the story in present tense, 'stares' and 'wonders' should not have the apostrophes, which are used to show possession).

Regarding these 2 sentences, "A moderate sized bed sat in the middle of the room, taking up most of the space. It had burgundy bedding on it, with one lone pillow that had lost its case awhile ago.", I think there are a number of ways you could combine them to make the piece seem a little less explanatory. Maybe something like, "A burgundy covered, moderate sized bed with a lone, caseless pillow took up most of the room."

*Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl*


Overall: Thank you for sharing this emotional, relatable piece. I enjoyed the read, and I look forward to checking out more of your work. I hope you have a wonderful WDC anniversary month and continue to share your talent with us!

*Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl*


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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
4
4
Review of "You Need Help"  Open in new Window.
Review by OOT™ Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" Open in new Window.*CakeP*

First of all, happy account anniversary! I'm OOT™ Author Icon, and I'm honored to review your work.

My Thoughts: I dropped by your port for an anniversary review, and I was pleased to come across this flash fiction piece. I love both reading and writing flash fiction, and I know how difficult it can be to write a meaningful story with such a limited word count, especially with a prompt. You did an excellent job here.

I like where you went with the story. First person narrative worked well for the piece, and the narrator's self deprecating humor made me instantly like him and empathize with him. The contrast between the narrator and Gabby made the couple work well together, and I could easily imagine them doing their project as you described.

The story's ending was perfect. Not only was it a satisfying closure for the piece, but it also enforced the message that each of us has our own talents and place on a team. Gabby needed the narrator's help as much as he needed hers, and only the team effort got them an A on the project. Great job!

*Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl*


My Suggestions: The story is written in past tense, but in the third paragraph, you switched back and forth between past and present tense. I suggest that you edit that paragraph to make it all past tense. "Gabby and I looked..." "She was tall, thin, always dressed..." The next sentence is present tense and should be edited as well.

*Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl*


Overall: Thank you for sharing this little gem. I thoroughly enjoyed the read, and I will definitely be returning to your port to check out more of your work. I hope you have a wonderful anniversary month and continue to share your talent with us!

*Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl*


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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
5
5
Review of ILeena Nottingham  Open in new Window.
Review by OOT™ Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (3.5)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" Open in new Window.*CakeP*

First of all, happy account anniversary! I'm OOT™ Author Icon, and I'm honored to review your work.

My Thoughts: I dropped by your port for an anniversary review, and I chose this piece, because it was written for the Sinister Stories Contest, and I'm a big fan of sinister stories. I did find it a bit odd that the description mentioned February 2018, but the story appears to have been written in February, 2023. Anyway...

I can't imagine how dreadful it would be for a mirror to say such horrible things and even follow poor ILeena around. I think the story could be interpreted in a few different ways, and after I finished reading, I began to wonder if poor ILeena might have been so down on herself that she was hallucinating and just imagining the mirror was talking to her and insulting her.

I like the way you ended the story on such a positive note. While the ending wasn't what I expected when thinking about a sinister story, I think it worked well and left me with a hopeful feeling instead of one of despair that I was anticipating.

*Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl*


My Suggestions: The beginning of the story was a little confusing as the first paragraph was written in first person, but the next paragraph (and remainder of the story) was written in third person. And in the second paragraph, it appears that ILeena is thinking, but her thoughts are not in italics or quotation marks to differentiate the thoughts.

There are several instances in which you used the word "that" twice in the same sentence, and one of them should be omitted.

I think the story would flow more smoothly if you switched the places of the third from last paragraph with the second from last paragraph. In the third from last paragraph, you speak of strength, possibilities and faith. Then, in the next paragraph, you go back to speaking of loneliness and failure. In the final paragraph, you speak of faith and victory. It sort of felt like ILeena finally had hope only to go right back to feeling hopeless and then having hope again.



*Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl*


Overall: I enjoyed reading the story overall, and I look forward to checking out more of your work. I hope you have a wonderful WDC anniversary month and keep writing and sharing your talent with us.

*Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl*


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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
6
6
Review by OOT™ Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (3.5)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" Open in new Window.*CakeP*

First of all, happy account anniversary! I'm OOT™ Author Icon, and I'm honored to review your work.

My Thoughts: I dropped by your port for an anniversary review and came across this eerie little story. I see in the story's description that this really happened to you. I cannot imagine how terrifying that must have been! I don't know how you managed to remain in the house after that chilling experience. I would have likely hightailed it out of there.

I wonder if the door to your grandparent's room was always open and if your grandmother was still alive at the time. This story left a lot of unanswered questions, and I will go into more detail below.

*Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl*


My Suggestions: I suggest that you expand this piece to add more detail and engage the reader more and even build the suspense. How old were you when this happened? What kind of relationship did you have with your grandfather? Did this happen soon after your grandfather's death? Did anyone else in your family experience a similar occurrence?

*Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl*


Overall: I enjoyed reading this chilling piece, and I'd like to learn of any similar experiences you have had. I hope you have a wonderful WDC anniversary month, and I look forward to reading more of your work!

*Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl*


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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
7
7
Review of Tower of Guilt  Open in new Window.
Review by OOT™ Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" Open in new Window.*CakeP*

First of all, happy account anniversary! I'm OOT™ Author Icon, and I'm honored to review your work.

My Thoughts: I dropped by your port for an anniversary review, and I was excited to see the number of flash fiction pieces you have. I love both reading and writing flash fiction, and I know how difficult it can be to tell a complete and interesting story in 300 words or less. You did a good job here, but I think I would have enjoyed the story more without the first paragraph.

The first paragraph was like a prologue. You talk about "her" and I can only assume you mean Jenny. She was running and "it" felt like a poker in her chest and caused her excruciating pain, but we never learn what "it" is. Instead, the next paragraph takes us to a different scene with Jenny and Tom going into a basement. The door slams shut behind them, and Tom slips and falls to his death. Then Jenny makes for the door, and the story ends. So why did the story begin with a female running with "it" causing her great physical pain, but we never learn what "it" is or how she came to be running or what she was running from?

I think the first paragraph would be a great prologue to a longer story where you eventually circle back and tell the reader how "she" (again, I assume Jenny) came to be running and what "it" was that caused her such great pain. But I don't think it works in such a short piece.

Overall: Thank you for sharing this interesting story. I did enjoy the first paragraph and then the remainder of the story; I just don't think they worked together. I will definitely visit your port again soon and check out some more of your flash fiction. I hope you have a fantastic WDC anniversary month and continue to share your talent with us!

*Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl*


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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
8
8
Review by OOT™ Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" Open in new Window.*CakeP*

First of all, happy account anniversary! I'm OOT™ Author Icon, and I'm honored to review your work.

My Thoughts: This is an unnerving and emotional piece, and I am so sorry you have lingering questions and thoughts that you didn't do enough. It seems like you did everything you possibly could to warn your ex, but she wouldn't give you the chance. And do you know if it would have made a difference even if she would have listened to you? Do you know how she died? I kept thinking it could have been cancer or a heart attack or something similar. And if that be the case, she was likely better off not knowing.

You didn't sense it and do nothing as you said at the end of the piece. You did everyting that you could have done...much more than most people would do. I see that the piece was written almost 3 years ago. I hope that time has helped you realize that there was nothing else you could have done and that you have closure now.

*Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl*


My Suggestions: In the next-to-last sentence of the third paragraph, "know" should be changed to "knew".

I would like to see this piece expanded, because it leaves the reader with a lot of questions. Was the breakup really so bad that she wouldn't speak with you decades later? Most of us make horrible mistakes when we're young and inexperienced, and I commend you for trying to make amends and look out for her. And, as I mentioned before, do you know what caused her death?


*Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl*


Overall: Thank you for sharing this emotional piece. I enjoyed learning of your experience, and I hope you have accepted that you did enough to warn/help her. I hope you have a great WDC anniversary month, and I look forward to seeing you around WDC more!

*Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl*


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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
9
9
Review of Smell the Roses  Open in new Window.
Review by OOT™ Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" Open in new Window.*CakeP*

First of all, happy account anniversary! I'm OOT™ Author Icon, and I'm honored to review your work.

My Thoughts: Wow! I loved this little gem! I know from experience how difficult it can be to write a meaningful story using 300 words or less, but you did brilliantly with this one. You even managed a decent description of the characters, and I could easily imagine the scene in the flower shop.

When I finished the story, I wondered for a moment why George would kill his wife if he loved her so much. And then the significance of Candy's vigorous hand washing hit me. I LOVE stories with a twist, and you did an excellent job with this one!

*Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl*


My Suggestions: I suggest changing the description to tell something about the piece rather than simply stating it's flash fiction. A snippet of what the story is about would likely draw more readers.

In the last sentence of the fourth paragraph, "she like" should be "she liked".


*Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl*


Overall: Thank you for providing this fantastic flash fiction piece. I thoroughly enjoyed the read, and I will most definitely be dropping by your port again soon. I hope you have a wonderful WDC anniversary month and continue to share your talent with us!

*Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl*


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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
10
10
Review of Elsa & Timothy  Open in new Window.
Review by OOT™ Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" Open in new Window.*CakeP*

First of all, happy account anniversary! I'm OOT™ Author Icon, and I'm honored to review your work.

My Thoughts: I was a bit disappointed by the brevity of the piece, but I see from the description that it is just supposed to be a title and a summary of a story based upon a picture. In that regard, it would be really beneficial to see the picture it was based upon.

That being said, I would be interested in reading the story based upon the summary you provide. Timothy seems like an interesting character: a down on his luck guy with marital and financial problems. And I would love to read about the chaos at the circus that brought these two unlikely friends together. I'd also like to know why you chose 1933 for the year of the story and how Timothy was able to transport Elsa back to his home. *Laugh*

*Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl*


My Suggestions: I understand that the picture that prompted the piece probably isn't available now, but I think it would be really helpful if you could add it.

In the last sentence, you say they prove "time without number". I have never heard this expression, and it was sort of a sticking point for me. I don't have a suggestion for a replacement, because I am unsure of the meaning of the phrase.

*Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl*


Overall: I enjoyed reading about this unique idea for a story, and I highly suggest you turn the idea into an actual story. I, for one, would be very interested in reading about the adventures of Elsa and Timothy. I hope you have a fantastic WDC anniversary month and continue to share your talent with us!

*Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl* *Paintbl*


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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
11
11
Review by OOT™ Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" Open in new Window.*CakeP*


First of all, happy account anniversary! I'm OOT™ Author Icon, and I'm honored to review your work.

My Thoughts: I dropped by your port for an anniversary review and was amazed by the number of items you have. After reading this beautiful poem, I will definitely be stopping by to read more! I chose this poem because the title caught my eye, and I ended up loving it!

In just 21 lines, you wrote a poem that engaged all of my senses. I could see the cabin scene, smell and taste the coffee, hear the birds, feel the breeze. The poem actually made me feel the melancholy of leaving a lover behind after a weekend getaway, knowing it would be a year before seeing them again. Fantastic job!!

*Starb*


My Suggestions: I read the poem twice, first to myself and then aloud, and I think it's perfect. The only valid suggestion I can make (and I might find out that you already have when I check out more of your poems) is for you to write more about this couple. I'm intrigued by a couple only getting to see each other once a year, and I'd love to learn more about the relationship.

*Starr*


Overall: Thank you for sharing this lovely poem. I feel a bit intimidated reviewing poetry, because short stories are my forte, but this one left a lasting impression. I love your writing style and look forward to reading more. I hope you have a wonderful WDC anniversary month and continue to share your talent with us!

*Starg*


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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
12
12
Review by OOT™ Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" Open in new Window.*CakeP*


First of all, happy account anniversary! I'm OOT™ Author Icon, and I'm honored to review your work.

My Thoughts: I loved your funny story about grandma losing her dentures when I dropped by your port earlier this month for an anniversary review, so I couldn't resist stopping by for another one before the month ends. I'm so glad I did. I chose this story, because I was intrigued by the description. I just had to know why the big gift box was empty.

You did a fantastic job describing the scene in such a short piece, and I could see the colorful ballons and hear the children giggling. And I could feel Miriam's despair as the party wore on and John hadn't arrived. I loved the emotional ending, and I had tears in my eyes when I finished the story. This is one of the best flash fiction stories I have read.

*Starb*


My Suggestions: As I read, I was thinking there's no way I'll be able to offer any useful suggestions, because this piece is absolutely perfect. But, luckily for me (because I have this as part of my Review Tool *Laugh*), I was able to find something.

In the fourth paragraph of the second part of the story, "it's time to cake the cake" should be "it's time to cut the cake". I know how difficult it can be to spot errors like that in your own writing. You tend to read the story how you expect it to be.

*Starr*


Overall: Thank you for providing another excellent story. It is truly a pleasure reading your work. Even though I'll try to spend the rest of the month doing anniversary reviews for authors I haven't previously reviewed, I will most certainly visit your port again in the near future for another great read. I hope you're enjoying your WDC anniversary month!

*Starg*


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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
13
13
Review of The Questions  Open in new Window.
Review by OOT™ Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" Open in new Window.*CakeP*


First of all, happy account anniversary! I'm OOT™ Author Icon, and I'm honored to review your work.

My Thoughts: I dropped by your port for an anniverary review, and I noticed that most of the items evidence that you were going through a dark time in your life when they were written. I hope things have improved for you since then. That being said, I'm sure many of us can relate to this piece and have asked the same or similar questions. You mentioned being complete by socialization in the poem. I particularly liked that, because it showed me that you were not withdrawing from those around you during that time.

You ended the poem with "Where are my answers?" Have you found your answers yet? I would say that you found them or will find them within yourself. The poem was apparently written during a time that you were confused and on the fence about a lot of things, and I hope you were able to find peace by writing about those feelings. I find writing to be an excellent outlet.

*Starb*


My Suggestions: "Will it go to waist?" should be changed to "Will it go to waste?" Waste is a part of the body above the hips. Waste refers to using something carelessly.

A space needs to be inserted between 10,000 and miles.

*Starr*


Overall: Thank you for sharing this personal piece. I enjoyed reading it and learning a little about you. I noticed that you haven't written anything lately, and I'd love to see new work showing how things are going for you now. I hope you have a wonderful WDC anniversary month, and I look forward to reading more of your work!

*Starg*

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
14
14
Review by OOT™ Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" Open in new Window.*CakeP*


First of all, happy account anniversary! I'm OOT™ Author Icon, and I'm honored to review your work.

My Thoughts: I chose this piece, because it was recently written and didn't have any reviews. I'm glad I did! I enjoyed the read, and I know this piece will stick with me awhile. I believe it could be interpreted in a number of ways. Is this a conversation between a husband and wife or a therapist and a patient? Or is the wife also a therapist?

Is the narrator suffering from DID or Alzheimer's? I'm sure if I read the piece 10 more times, I would come up with 100 more questions. I would love to learn more about the narrator, and I think a follow-up piece or an expansion of this one is definitely in order!

*Starb*


My Suggestions: I think the piece would be an easier read if you used quotation marks, at least to differentiate what "she" says. I few times, I had to re-read a sentence to determine if it was something "she" was saying or part of the narrator's thoughts.

*Starr*


Overall: Thank you for sharing this interesting, thought-provoking piece. I'm sure I'll be returning to read it more as well as checking out the other items in your port. I hope you have a wonderful WDC anniversary month and continue to share your talent with us!

*Starg*


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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
15
15
Review by OOT™ Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" Open in new Window.*CakeP*


First of all, happy account anniversary! I'm OOT™ Author Icon, and I'm honored to review your work.

My Thoughts: I loved this humorous little story! And if it's nonfiction, I can totally relate. As I read, it was almost like you were talking about my husband's antics. You hooked me in with the first sentence, and the ending was perfect. And, yes, I can also relate to throwing it back in his face whenever I happen to win. *Laugh*

My favorite part was the "Mr. Bucket Incident," resulting in your daughter's aversion to anything shaped like a bucket. I was a bit horrified that he bullied his way to victory, but I couldn't stop laughing. Great job!

*Starb*


My Suggestions: This is going to be difficult, because I enjoyed the piece so much and couldn't find anything to critique. Grammar, spelling and punctuation were stellar. The length and content were just right, and the piece held my interest throughout. If I must offer a suggestion for improvement, I suggest you omit (Revised) from the title. I understand why you would initially do that, but it appears that the piece was written quite some time ago, so I think it would be safe to take it off now.

*Starr*

Overall: Thank you for sharing this little gem. I thoroughly enjoyed the read, and I will most definitely be dropping by your port again soon. I hope you have a wonderful WDC anniversary month and continue to share your talent with us. (And I wish you many gaming victories to rub in your hubby's face!)

*Starg*


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16
16
Review of It Is What It Is  Open in new Window.
Review by OOT™ Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" Open in new Window.*CakeP*


First of all, happy account anniversary! I'm OOT™ Author Icon, and I'm honored to review your work.

My Thoughts: I dropped by your port for an anniversary review, and I was thrilled to see that you're a writer of flash fiction! I love both reading and writing it, and I know from experience how difficult it can be to write an interesting story with such a stringent word limit. You made it look effortless!

I assume that the bold words throughout the piece were requried by a prompt, and you did an excellent job of using them in the flow of the story. I could easily picture the scene you described, and, unfortunately, I can relate to Mr. Pottle's procrastination. (And Mr. Pottle is a fantastic name for this particular character!) I loved the story from beginning to end. Great job!

*Starb*


My Suggestions: I suggest you reconsider beginning two different paragraphs with "An hour later". Since the piece is so short, it is more obvious than it would be otherwise. In order to keep your word count, I'd suggest starting the fourth paragraph with "After another hour..." or something similar.

*Starr*


Overall: Thank you for sharing this humorous little story. I thoroughly enjoyed the read, and I look forward to visiting your port again soon to get my flash fiction fix. I hope you have a wonderful WDC anniversary month and continue to share your talent with us!

*Starg*


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17
17
Review by OOT™ Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" Open in new Window.*CakeP*


First of all, happy account anniversary! I'm OOT™ Author Icon, and I'm honored to review your work.

My Thoughts: I chose this story from all of the excellent items in your port because it didn't have any ratings, and I'm glad I did. I really enjoyed the read. I read the note at the bottom of the piece first, and it helped to explain the use of the emoticons throughout. I was also glad you included the prompt, and I like that you chose to write from the perspective of a teacher preparing for the first day of a new school year rather than a student.

I enjoyed your use of dialogue in the story, and it flowed smoothly and held my interest throughout. I was especially impressed that you chose "volleying" as one of your emoticon words, and it worked perfectly. Very creative!

*Starb*


My Suggestions: A couple of times in the story, you asked a question and followed it with "said" instead of "asked". For example, "What are best friends for," she said should be "What are best friends for?" she asked.

In the eleventh paragraph, "them exhaling" should be "then exhaling".

A little later, this sentence confused me. "I don't want to not let her down" I think the word "not" should be omitted from that sentence. Also, since she is speaking with her friend, shouldn't it be "I don't want to let you down"?

*Starr*


Overall: Thank you for sharing this little story. I enjoyed the read and hope you did well in the contest. I also hope you have a fantastic WDC anniversary month and continue to share your talent with us!

*Starg*


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18
18
Review of Start Again  Open in new Window.
Review by OOT™ Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" Open in new Window.*CakeP*


First of all, happy account anniversary! I'm OOT™ Author Icon, and I'm honored to review your work.

My Thoughts: I rarely review poetry, but I noticed this poem was written quite some time ago and had no reviews, so I couldn't resist. I'm so glad I checked it out! I'm sure that most of us can relate to this poem and appreciate the encouraging message you convey. This is my first week back on the site after a break that ended up lasting way too long, and your poem even made me think of that.

*Starb*


My Suggestions: It was a bit of a sticking point for me that the word "isn't" was in all caps. I just couldn't understand why you chose that particular word to emphasize. I would expect to see an emphasis on "start again" instead. And why "isn't" instead of "didn't" which appeared earlier in the poem? Yes, I know I'm overthinking this. lol

*Starr*


Overall: I enjoyed reading this inspirational piece, and I will definitely be dropping by your port again to check out more of your work. I hope you have a wonderful WDC anniversary month and continue to share your talent with us!

*Starg*


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19
19
Review of Glass Pearl  Open in new Window.
Review by OOT™ Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" Open in new Window.*CakeP*


First of all, happy account anniversary! I'm OOT™ Author Icon, and I'm honored to review your work.

My Thoughts: I love flash fiction, and I'm glad I came across this little gem. You have managed to create a complete and interesting story with a very limited word count. And I especially like the unusual subject matter. Great job!

*Starb*


My Suggestions: I would suggest editing the piece to add commas. I noticed a lot of instances where commas should be added to ensure a smoother read. For instance, "A few days later, something strange happened."

*Starr*


Overall: I enjoyed reading about Cynthia the oyster, and I look forward to checking out more of your work in the future. I hope you have a wonderful WDC anniversary month and continue to share your talent with us!

*Starg*


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20
20
Review by OOT™ Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (5.0)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" Open in new Window.*CakeP*


First of all, happy account anniversary! I'm OOT™ Author Icon, and I'm honored to review your work.

My Thoughts: I love reading and writing flash fiction, and you did an excellent job with this little story. You created the scene perfectly, and I know from experience how difficult that is to do with a 300-word limit. I could easily imagine the dentures flying into the punch bowl to the horror and amusement of the wedding guests. Adding the appropriate song was an especially nice touch. Grandma quickly becomes the joke as the joke she overheard becomes forgotten by her blunder. *Laugh*

*Starb*

My Suggestions: You refer to grandma's denture several times in the story. I believe it should be dentures. You do refer to them as dentures in the second paragraph. Despite my best effort, I couldn't find anything else that you should consider changing in this piece. Great job!

*Starr*

Overall: Thank you for sharing this humorous little story. I thoroughly enjoyed the read, and I look forward to checking out more of your work. I hope you have a wonderful WDC anniversary month and continue to share your talent with us!

*Starg*


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21
21
Review of Make It Count  Open in new Window.
Review by OOT™ Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" Open in new Window.*CakeP*


First of all, happy account anniversary! I'm OOT™ Author Icon, and I'm honored to review your work.

My Thoughts: Hello, my WDC friend and storoem creator! I decided to drop by your port for an anniversary review, and the title of this poem caught my eye. Although I'm usually intimidated by reviewing poetry, I know what I like, and I loved this poem!

Although the poem was rather short, I found it to be complete. You made every word count, and the ending was perfect. All too often, we get wrapped up in the mundane tasks of our everyday lives and lose sight of what's really important. This piece is a great reminder that we all need to strive to be the best that we can be, not only for ourselves but also to improve the lives of those around us. Bravo!

*Starb*


My Suggestions: Grammar, spelling and punctuation are flawless, and the poem flowed smoothly even when I read it aloud. I have no suggestions for improvement, as I find the poem to be perfect as-is. I will, however, suggest that you keep writing and sharing your talent with the WDC community!

*Starr*


Overall: Thank you for sharing this beautiful, motivational poem. It was a pleasure to read and review, and I look forward to visiting your port again soon. I hope you have had a wonderful 17th WDC anniversary!

*Starg*


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22
22
Review of Wicked Thoughts  Open in new Window.
Review by OOT™ Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" Open in new Window.*CakeP*


First of all, happy account anniversary! I'm OOT™ Author Icon, and I'm honored to review your work.

My Thoughts: It looks like I've landed in the middle of a series, but I really enjoyed this short story. Mike Midas is an interesting character, and I enjoyed his innuendo. In a very short piece, you managed to give an adequate history of your character and present a conflict as well as a resolution. More importantly, you did it in such a way as to keep me interested throughout and make me anxious to read more about Mike Midas. Great job!

*Starb*


My Suggestions: Grammar, spelling and punctuation were flawless. I did find it a little strange that you mentioned Crystal once without a real introduction or any follow-up, but the note at the end somewhat explained it.

*Starr*


Overall: Thank you for sharing this short story. It was a pleasure to read and review, and I'm on my way to check out "Size Matters" now. I hope you had a wonderful 11th WDC anniversary!

*Starg*


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23
23
Review of In the Clouds  Open in new Window.
Review by OOT™ Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" Open in new Window.*CakeP*


First of all, happy account anniversary! I'm OOT™ Author Icon, and I'm honored to review your work.

My Thoughts: I chose this story, because I'm a big fan of flash fiction, and I rarely see 100 word stories. I know from experience how difficult it can be to write a complete and meaningful story in 300 words or less, but you made it seem effortless. Great job.

I love the plot of this story, and it was easy to imagine the scene that you described. First person narration was a great choice for this piece, and I found myself chuckling as I thought of the poor narrator stuck in the giant marshmallow. The ending was perfect!

*Starb*


My Suggestions: I would suggest editing to get rid of some of the ellipses. One instance is fine, but I found the use of so many in such a short piece distracting.

Also, including the contractions, I noticed 6 instances of the word "had" in a 100 word story. Since you have to make every word count in such a short piece, I would replace some of these with other words.

*Starr*


Overall: Thank you for sharing this short story. It was a pleasure to read and review, and I will definitely be dropping by your port again soon. I hope you had a wonderful 15th WDC anniversary!

*Starg*


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24
24
Review of School Spirit  Open in new Window.
Review by OOT™ Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" Open in new Window.*CakeP*


First of all, happy account anniversary! I'm OOT™ Author Icon, and I'm honored to review your work.

My Thoughts: I love reading and writing flash fiction, and I know from experience how difficult it can be to write a complete and meaningful story in 300 words or less. You made it seem effortless here.

Your story was interesting and original, and I was taken back to the days of high school as I read...homecoming activities, proms, etc. You have a great writing style, and you captured my interest at the beginning of the story and held it throughout. I saw that you have numerous flash fiction stories in your port, and I will definitely be checking out more of them.

*Starb*


My Suggestions: Despite my best efforts, I have no suggestions to make this story better. Grammar, spelling, and punctuation are flawless, and I think the story is perfect as-is.

*Starr*


Overall: Thank you for sharing this terrific short story. It was a pleasure to read and review, and I look forward to visiting your port again soon. I hope you have a wonderful 11th WDC anniversary!

*Starg*


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25
25
Review of The TEACUP  Open in new Window.
Review by OOT™ Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Hi, J.L. O'Dell Author Icon! I'm OOT™ Author Icon and I'm honored to review your work on behalf of "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" Open in new Window..

My Thoughts: I'm back with my third review, and I am happy to say that this is another excellent story. I got so caught up in the read that I couldn't believe it was almost a thousand words! That's definitely a compliment. My eyes were glued to the screen from the first sentence to the last word!

It appears from the bolded sentence at the end that you wrote this piece from a prompt sentence. You did a fantastic job! The story was interesting and original, and it was easy for me to empathize with the young, struggling couple and celebrate their good fortune with them. I almost want to make a trip to Goodwill to see if I can have similar luck! *Laugh*

It was a brilliant idea to make the reunion of the cup and saucer magical. And the fact that the fifty dollars was replaced soon after it was taken makes me think that the couple may be able to get ahead. I found Nick and Wendy to be likable characters, and I was happy with the luck they had as the story progressed.

*Starb**Starb**Starb**Starb**Starb**Starb**Starb**Starb**Starb**Starb**Starb**Starb*


My Suggestions: The comma should be omitted after "was" in the second sentence of the first paragraph.

In the first sentence of the second paragraph, I suggest changing "you would find" to "we would find".

There were a couple of instances where a period should be replaced with a question mark:

"Weird. Isn’t it?"

"Still no ideas about the money?"

*Starr**Starr**Starr**Starr**Starr**Starr**Starr**Starr**Starr**Starr**Starr**Starr*


Overall: If this story was written for a contest, I can't imagine that it didn't win. I loved it! I'm thrilled that you won my package in the auction, because I'm thoroughly enjoying your writing. I'll be back with your fourth review soon.

*Starg**Starg**Starg**Starg**Starg**Starg**Starg**Starg**Starg**Starg**Starg**Starg*


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